Agatha
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Another day, another incredibly racist policy put forth by the Trump administration.

A huge question is looming on the horizon, and no it’s not “what is the song of the summer?” We know it’s every song on Carly Rae Jepsen's latest album.

Everyone shut up!

In terms of villains, Monsanto is about as evil as a Bachelor contestant constantly asking to “steal him for a minute” throughout the whole show.

Yesterday, the Pentagon released its biennial report on sexual assault in the military and gals, it ain’t good.

There officially 19 candidates trying to win the Democratic nomination for president in 2020, and that shockingly does not even include Joe Biden, who is rumored to be declaring on Thursday.

America's favorite uncle might actually be America's creepy uncle. (It's such a fine line with uncles, isn't it?) Though the former Vice President hasn't officially announced his candidacy he's been winking at it the last few weeks and it's reminding a lot of people of times in the past he's winked at them and made them uncomfortable.

There’s one person in Trump’s inner circle who isn’t given enough credit for just how hard they work and that is, of course, his wife.

Not to be too crude, but the Mueller investigation has ended and it feels like letting out a big sh*t you’ve kept in for 22 months.

Apologies to the Boston Tea Party, but yesterday’s Michael Cohen testimony to the House Oversight Committee is now the day in our nation’s history most associated with scalding hot tea.

By now you’ve probably heard about the Jussie Smollett incident that took place in Chicago a few weeks ago.

America’s first daughter is up to some trouble again.

The hottest club in Washington DC tonight is the State of the Union!

Attention all sh*t-talkers, gather round.

Just as the prophecies foretold, Kamala Harris has declared her bid for a 2020 Presidential run.

While it seems like Donald Trump has been our president longer than Grey's Anatomy has been on air, it's only been three years, which means in one year we will have the incredible opportunity to vote him out of office.

It’s barely one week into 2019 and Trump must’ve had a resolution to shake sh*t up early and often because he’s off to a great start.

While we are all reeling from New Years hangovers and tearing up at the idea of actually committing to Whole 30, there’s a whole crew of people in Washington DC enthusiastically having their first day of work.

Boots.

Once again, Kim Kardashian has proven to be the ultimate influencer.

With the world crumbling around us, it feels more and more comforting to block out all reality and go into la la land.

Every single thing in our lives has turned upside down in the past few years, and 2019 isn’t promising to be any different.

While Rudy Giuliani doesn't understand how a link works, millennial congressional queen, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is giving us the Instagram stories our social-media addicted hearts desire.

Christmas used to be a magical time of year when you’d spend time with family and eat pie for breakfast.

Ladies, it is time to don our traditional mourning smokey eye.

'Twas Robert Frost who wrote “nothing gold can stay” but twas Juul that implemented “nothing mango flavored can stay.” The company, which is responsible for over 75% of all e-cig sales, has taken its flavored pods off the shelves and shut down all of its social media in the U.S.

What are the midterm elections if not another opportunity for our terror in chief to address the nation?

Now that Halloween is over, the truly terrifying holiday approaches: Election Day.

Is Pharrell Williams the chosen one who will stop Trump?

Are you a Friends addict who simply can’t be satiated by the reruns on Netflix?

Another day of his presidency, another day Donald Trump has held a rally.

It is mid-October and I know that the only thing on your mind is if it’s appropriate to be a slutty [insert common household object] for Halloween.

Yesterday President Trump “wrote” an op-ed for USA Today, which I can only assume sent Fox News into a complete Gretchen Weiner mental tailspin.

Well, it's taken nearly a decade but Taylor Swift has finally taken a successful stab at Kanye.

2018 has been nothing short of a horror show in it's entirety and October is the month to celebrate that!

This morning.

Chris Harrison is going to have to retire his go-to Bachelor teaser, “this is the most dramatic moment in Bachelor history” because earlier this week, something happened on Bachelor Vietnam that truly can never be topped.

Brilliance requires a certain amount of insanity, but Elon Musk, never one to back down, really goes above and beyond what’s required. 2018 has been, across the board, a nutso year, but that statement is most true for the man who up until recently, I thought was a car. (Seriously, you can’t just name your kid Elon Musk…) So what has the former PayPal CEO and walking billboard for hair plugs (Google it) been up to this year?

It’s said that everything the Trump administration does is a distraction from something more important going on and this week was no different.

If you smell smoke this morning, no you didn’t leave your straightener on (but, girl, double check) you’re probably just in the vicinity of a lunatic who is burning their Nike sneakers.

Here at The Betches Sup, it’s our job to share with you and break down today’s news.

There is no occurrence on this beautiful shriveling planet that I understand less than Trump having been married three times and based on how many children he’s had plus a Stormy Daniels’ tell-all, having sex at least six times.

Let’s take a break from shocking news to discuss something that makes us all silently shake our head and say “no, duh.” No, I’m not talking about Trump reportedly saying the N-word, though that does apply.

In a dream world, all public figures would be both good and hot (aka Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.) Unfortunately, 2018 is shaping up to be a new level of hell none of us were prepared for.

Since Sacha Baron Cohen’s Who Is America has come out, it’s been a delightful and cringeworthy surprise every episode to see which GOP lawmaker he gets to drop their pants.

Yesterday a very special one-on-one took place and no it wasn’t on The Bachelorette.

Last night in the beautiful flyover state if Ohio, pornographic actress and sexiest member of the resistance, Stormy Daniels was arrested.

With our most patriotic day of the year behind us, it is up to you to save our Democracy.

Yesterday we were granted approximately 15 minutes to celebrate a victorious primary election night for Democrats before it was announced there’d be a third season of The Handmaid’s Tale and the American public would be starring in it.

Donald Trump is forever on the campaign trail, but what he doesn’t know is that he’s already cemented first place as the worst person in the history of the world.