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How To Throw A Virtual Bachelorette Party That Isn't Sad

There’s no way around it: Coronavirus is f*cking things up. Between healthcare, the economy, and mental wellbeing, this sh*t is, as Kelly Kapoor would say, “B-A-N-A-N-A-S.” In addition to all of the terrible things everyday folks are dealing with, couples who had spring and summer (and maybe fall?) weddings planned are having to change the biggest day of their lives. While it’s heartening to see couples making the best out of a god-awful situation with virtual weddings and proposals, it’s okay to admit that for 2020 brides, this majorly blows.

While weddings and showers are huge parts of the “getting married” celebrations, one of the most anticipated events brides are having to postpone or cancel is their bachelorette parties. With travel restrictions and social distancing in place, getting 15 of your best friends together for a weekend of drinking and debauchery seems like something from a distant world. While it might not be ideal, having a virtual bachelorette party is a great solution to an otherwise dumpster fire of a situation. As someone who recently attended one (and had the hangover to prove it), I’m here to break down the whys and hows of having a virtual bachelorette party that doesn’t suck as much as it sounds like it will.

The Perks Of A Virtual Bachelorette Party

I have to admit: There are actual, real-life, non-coronavirus perks to having a virtual bachelorette party. In addition to saving yourself and your friends so much money, you’ll basically have a meeting where everyone is nice to you and gets you drunk. You don’t have to clean up, you don’t have to coordinate travel and meals and the wants of 12 different people, and you won’t deal with the strain of someone bailing last minute, causing you to pick up their part of the Airbnb and hate them forever.

With a virtual bachelorette party, you can invite more friends to hang out in a low-pressure environment, all while still keeping the important aspects of a bachelorette party intact: getting drunk, playing games, and embarrassing the bride. Here’s how to do it in a way that’ll make you say, “Wait, did I actually just have fun on a video chat?”

1. Theme

While the usual “put a whole bunch of penis stuff on every surface of the hotel room” won’t really work here, you can still make the event feel special. Have the MOH and/or bridesmaids pull together a small budget for the party and use that money toward creating a theme. Send the bride and the virtual guests streamers, signs, photo props, wigs—anything simple that can be hung up and seen from others’ screens. In addition to tangible items, ask all of the guests to pick a virtual background of either an embarrassing picture of the bride or her favorite destination to make it seem like everyone’s really all together.

2. Outfits

One of the best ways to get into the party spirit is to dress up. Just because you’re not physically going anywhere, it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t use this as a chance for a bomb Instagram like you would any other bachelorette. Most of the time, the attire goes along with the location, such as cowboy boots in Nashville or sarongs in someplace sunny. Now, however, the sheer act of putting on makeup and a new dress is enough to get excited about. While Amazon has delayed shipping for non-essential items, other wedding-famous retailers, such as Rent The Runway and Adrianna Papell are still fulfilling orders in a timely manner.

“We feel that honoring the bride and bridal party in such a special time in the bride’s life is important,” says Adrianna Papell Director of e-commerce, Caroline Colavita. “Just because we can’t physically be together right now doesn’t mean the bride and her guests don’t deserve to wear something special.” It’s the reason couples are having formal date nights at home and those getting married are still donning their wedding day attire: Getting dressed up makes you feel good. Whether you wear the cocktail gown that’s been sitting in your closet for months or order something new (#StimulateTheEconomy), this is a great excuse to change out of your pajamas for once and see if you still remember how to contour.

3. Favors

Whether it’s personalized koozies to remember the virtual bachelorette party, wine glasses with everyone’s name on them, or just a sh*t-ton of penis straws, favors are a great way to thank the (virtual) guests for coming and make the party feel a little more special and a little more like an in-person bachelorette. In addition to favors for the guests, use part of the budget for a gift to the bride from everyone. Buy her the wedding day robe she’s been eying, an at-home spa kit, or hell, maybe a new vibrator. Whatever it is, just gift her something to make her feel pampered and loved in spite of the circumstances.  

4. Alcohol

While the theme and the outfits and the people are important, let’s be real: alcohol is the most important component of any bachelorette party, but especially a virtual one. With everyone in their own homes, utilizing drinking games is an easy way to loosen everyone up and get guests chatting. Drop off some alcohol at the bride’s house (leave it at the door, duh) or have some delivered for her event. Whether you incorporate shot glasses, funnels, or chambongs is up to you, but waking up the next day just as hungover as you would at any other bachelorette party is the goal (except now you don’t have to worry about passing out at the bar or going home with a rando), so drink responsibly and appropriately. And by that, I mean do the bride proud and at least brown out. 

5. Games

Games, though sometimes mocked, are crucial to any in-person or virtual bachelorette party. Not only do they help break the ice, but they’re a great way to get guests drinking, laughing, and making the bride feel special. Below are a few tried-and-true games that work just as great virtually as they do in person.

Drink Every Time You Say: Whether it’s “bride,” “wedding,” or “coronavirus,” this simple game is a must for literally any social situation. Granted, once you get drunk enough you’ll forget you’re playing, but whatever. It just really kicks things off. Pick a word (or words) and if anyone says it, they have to drink. Call each other out and watch as your friends go from sober to “I’M HAVING THE BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE” like that!

Guess The Panties: Have each guest order a pair of underwear for the bride (ensure they choose the “gift” option so their names aren’t on the packaging). At the party, the bride will pull each pair out and guess who she thinks purchased them for her. If she gets it right, the buyer has to take a drink. If she gets it wrong, she has to take a drink and keep guessing until she gets it correct.

Name The Ex: Before the party, have the bride write down the most scandalous things she’s done with all of her exes (along with the names of who she did them with). Shoot for 10-15 (or at least one for each guest). At the party, read an act to each guest and have her guess which ex she thinks was involved. If she gets it right, the bride drinks, if she gets it wrong, she drinks.

Porn or Polish: One of the most classic bachelorette party games can be played virtually. Have the MOH download the questions and the answers and ask the group one at a time. Each guest has to type whether she thinks the option is the name of a porn film or the name of a nail polish. Once everyone’s answers are submitted, the MOH will tell the answer and will assign everyone who got it wrong to take a drink.

Ask The Groom: Have the MOH email the groom a list of questions to secretly answer. At the party, have the bride guess his answers to the questions. If she gets it right, she gets to tell someone to drink. If she gets it wrong, however, she has to drink.

6. Social That Sh*t

Just because you’re not getting blacked out on Bourbon Street or chugging on the Vegas strip, it doesn’t make your event any less important. Utilize a hashtag just as you would with any other bachelorette to make social media bystanders feel left out included and make sure to have your husband/boyfriend/partner/self-timer take some bomb photos of you in your outfit. Take screenshots of the virtual group, take selfies chugging, and share the love in your stories. With so few events to look forward to, go as extra as humanly possible—trust us, you’ve earned it. With a little bit of flexibility and a whole lot of vodka, your virtual bachelorette party will truly be the night you’ll never remember, just as you always hoped.

Images: Sergii Sobolevskyi / Shutterstock.com; Giphy (2); Rachel Varina

Rachel Varina
Formerly one of the HBICs at Total Sorority Move (RIP), Rachel Varina has a long history of writing about things that make her parents ashamed. She's an avid lover of holding grudges, sitting down, and buffalo chicken dip. Currently, she lives in Tampa, Florida, but did not feed her husband to tigers. And even though she's married (with a *gasp* baby), she doesn't suck. Promise. PROMISE! Follow her on Instagram and Twitter (@rachelvarina) so she gets more followers than that influencer her husband dated in high school.