Rachel
Varina

Formerly one of the HBICs at Total Sorority Move (RIP), Rachel Varina has a long history of writing about things that make her parents ashamed. She's an avid lover of holding grudges, sitting down, and buffalo chicken dip. Currently, she lives in Tampa, Florida, but did not feed her husband to tigers. And even though she's married (with a *gasp* baby), she doesn't suck. Promise. PROMISE! Follow her on Instagram and Twitter (@rachelvarina) so she gets more followers than that influencer her husband dated in high school.

Stuff I Wrote

Best Early Amazon Prime Day Deals To Shop Before The Sale Even Officially Starts

By Rachel Varina

If you're not early, you're late.

The Rise Of The Miscarriage Announcement

By Rachel Varina

A former co-worker posted about her pregnancy loss a week before I started trying to get pregnant.

WTF Does TTC Mean? Here’s Your Full Glossary Of 'Trying to Conceive' Acronyms

By Rachel Varina

So you’ve decided to start trying for a baby.

The Best "Trying to Conceive" Products That *Actually* Work

By Rachel Varina

Deciding to have kids is one of the biggest decisions someone can make outside of like, getting bangs.

The Best Bandage Dresses That *Won't* Give You 2013 Whiplash

By Rachel Varina

Resistance is futile.

Chic Nighties That Don't Look Like Your Grandma's (Unless Granny Is A Hottie?)

By Rachel Varina

Unless you're actively starring in a Werther’s Original commercial or hosting tea for your quilting circle, there's really no reason to be wearing a nightgown that looks like it survived the Great Depression.

What Giving Birth Actually Feels Like, According to 100 Real Moms

By Rachel Varina

There are plenty of things people love to glamorize about pregnancy and childbirth.

New Study Validates That Moms Are Not Okay (And Haven’t Been for a While)

By Rachel Varina

This report made me laugh so hard I peed a little.

The Only Father's Day Gift Guide You Need For Every Type Of Dad

By Rachel Varina

Don't Venmo him $50 with a thumbs-up emoji.

Trying To Get Pregnant On Ozempic? Here’s What The Group Chats (And Experts) Say

By Rachel Varina

Hear from moms-to-be on GLP-1s while TTC.

I'm Sorry To Say, Kegels Aren't The Miracle Vag Exercise We Were Led To Believe

By Rachel Varina

If you’ve given birth — or honestly, just existed anywhere near the internet — you’ve probably been told to “do your Kegels.” They’re pitched as a fix for everything: bladder leaks, better orgasms, postpartum healing, prolapse.

Summer Deals You Need To Snatch Up From The Nordstrom Half-Yearly Sale

By Rachel Varina

The sale is live now and runs through June 1.

'Grey’s Anatomy' Taught Me About Postpartum Preeclampsia — And It Honestly Saved My Life

By Rachel Varina

When I was first diagnosed, I was floored.

Jennifer Lawrence Was Asked How Becoming A Mom Has Changed Her — Here's Her Brutally Honest Answer

By Rachel Varina

Go on, just give her the Oscar already.

The Ultimate Mother's Day Gift Guide For Every Type Of Mom

By Rachel Varina

Let’s be honest: Buying Mother’s Day gifts is kind of a nightmare.

A Realistic Guide to Taking a Family Vacation: What To Pack And How To Stay Sane

By Rachel Varina

Pro Tip: Let the Grandparents Be the Real MVPs

Um, Is The Sleepover Officially Over? Why Some Parents Are Opting Out

By Rachel Varina

It looks like the classic childhood sleepover might be headed for extinction.

Does PR For Motherhood Need A Rebrand?

By Rachel Varina

So, ICYMI… apparently, moms are miserable now.

Spring Cleaning Essentials That’ll Make Your Annual Refresh Suck Less

By Rachel Varina

It’s time to channel your inner Type A.

Still Hung Up On 'A Court Of Thorns And Roses'? You Might Be Fictosexual

By Rachel Varina

If you thought dating in the real world was bad, imagine just opting out entirely and falling in love with a fictional character instead.

This Shit Is Up To 70% Off! The Best Presidents' Day Sales That Are Actually Worth Shopping

By Rachel Varina

Paying full price feels worse than liking someone’s 2015 IG post.

Chrissy Teigen Posted A Bath Pic With Her Kids And It's Turned Into A Full-Blown Moral Debate

By Rachel Varina

Just when you thought the internet had enough to be mad about, a celebrity has managed to spark yet another controversy for merely giving the people what they want: an inside look into their private lives.

Super Bowl Party Essentials For Both The Swifties and The Football Fans

By Rachel Varina

Whether you’re in it for the game, the commercials, or just here to see what Taylor Swift wears in the VIP suite, Super Bowl Sunday is basically a national holiday.

All Of The Best Cyber Monday Deals In One Place — You're Welcome

By Rachel Varina

None of that “5% off if you spend $500” nonsense.

By Rachel Varina

Richard is a beautiful name for a baby girl.

There Is Nothing "Unspoken" About Parents Becoming Grandparents (Yes, I'm Talking About *That* Viral Article)

By Rachel Varina

An open letter to the NYT's viral "The Unspoken Grief of Never Becoming a Grandparent" article.

Oh This? Just 40 Early Black Friday Deals You Can Shop RTFN

By Rachel Varina

The best part about Black Friday shopping?

Here's Everything You'll Forget To Pack For Your Babymoon

By Rachel Varina

Enjoy some mocktails in peace.

Just A Bunch Of White Elephant Gifts That'll Make You The Star Of The Party

By Rachel Varina

Get a gift so coveted that it gets stolen over and over again.

The Best Gifts For (Tired and Overwhelmed) New Parents

By Rachel Varina

These gifts say, “I get what you’re going through."

The Best Secret Santa Gifts For Literally Any Name Your Draw

By Rachel Varina

Warning: everyone will be asking, “Where did you get that?!”

The Best Holiday Gifts Under $50 That Still Seem Hella $$$

By Rachel Varina

Spreading the joy without sacrificing funds you don't have.

Babymoon Tip: Leave Your Partner and Bring Your Best Friend Instead

By Rachel Varina

Highly recommend a long, baby-and-boy-free weekend.

PSA: The Switch Witch Is Out to Ruin Your Kids' Lives

By Rachel Varina

This has Almond Moms all over it.

The Most Iconic (And Last-Minute) Halloween Costumes for Moms

By Rachel Varina

Sit back and sip your (hopefully spiked) PSL.

The Best Baby Deals For October Amazon Prime Day 2024

By Rachel Varina

As a toddler mom with another baby on the way, I’ll be the first to admit that having a kid is expensive.

The Best Book Deals On October Amazon Prime Day to Shop Now

By Rachel Varina

The cozy days of fall are officially here, which means it’s the perfect time to curl up with a good book and ignore the world around you.

The Best October Amazon Prime Day Deals on Internet Famous Products

By Rachel Varina

After months of scrolling and liking, following and FYP-ing, the most wonderful day of the year is here for all of us chronically online folks.

The Best-Selling October Amazon Prime Deals That You'll Love

By Rachel Varina

Let’s cut to the chase, y’all.

Get The Most Outta Your Bump With These Pregnant Halloween Costumes

By Rachel Varina

ICYMI, growing a human being is a pretty big deal.

Is It Postpartum Anxiety Or Just Motherhood? Therapist Answers Common Questions From Anxious Moms

By Rachel Varina

Feeling the squeeze of motherhood anxiety lately?

ATTN: Sisterhood Matters WAY More to Me Than the Intense Pain of Childbirth

By Rachel Varina

Giving birth isn’t just about the birthing partner. (This is a joke.)

If Birth Plans Were Brutally Honest And Uncomfortably Accurate

By Rachel Varina

Elective C-section. Please. Please?

Horror Story! Bride Cancels Wedding After Fiancé Sides With His Sister On Literally ~Everything~

By Rachel Varina

I’m all for wedding drama but this is an emotional train wreck.

Unfortunately, The 'Unschooling' Parenting Trend Isn't A Laissez-Faire Dream For Students

By Rachel Varina

And yes, it’s legal in the U.S.

Couple Sends Savage 'You're Not Invited' Wedding Cards to Folks Who Didn't Make The Cut

By Rachel Varina

We all know weddings are a breeding ground for drama and unexpected twists.

PSA: I'm Literally Begging You To Stop Putting Emojis Over Your Baby's Face

By Rachel Varina

Your emoji-covered baby haunts my dreams.

75 Real Moms Reveal Their Weirdest Pregnancy Cravings (Yes, Even Bleach)

By Rachel Varina

Anyone else have a visceral desire to consume raw shrimp while smelling hand sanitizer?

Olivia Culpo Is Giving "Pick Me Girl" Energy — And No, It's Not Just Because Of The Wedding Dress

By Rachel Varina

The most crucial decision any bride makes surrounding her wedding is — without a doubt — what she’ll wear for her walk down the aisle.

Bride's Boob-Forward Wedding Dress is Going Viral For Two 32F-Sized Reasons

By Rachel Varina

"Feel free to screenshot this for later 😘” is an iconic response.

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