We are three days into 2024 and to say I am changed on a cellular level would be an understatement. And it’s not because I have been working out, eating healthy, or living up to any of my New Year’s resolutions. It’s because I watched the season 4 finale of The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City.
For a while now, RHOSLC has been the little kid sister of all the other franchises. It’s had incredible moments like when a goddamn S.W.A.T. team surrounded a sprinter van in the Beauty Lab and Laser parking lot. *chills* But overall, it hasn’t been a favorite of mine. Then, this year something in the wind had shifted. We were finally past the Jen Shah of it all, which sucked up all the women’s energy. This season it felt like these housewives found their footing. Every single episode hasn’t felt long enough, and I found myself hanging on every single word and subtle side-eye.
When I started seeing rumblings on social media about the finale saying that it “will shock you”, and “craziest finale EVER!!!” — I was skeptical. Because, God love him, but Andy Cohen has said that about seasons past and it ends up being lackluster at best. But this time it felt different. Not since Kristen Doute admitted to sleeping with Jax Taylor in season 2 of Vanderpump Rules, or when it came out during the season 9 reunion of Real Housewives of Atlanta that Phaedra Parks spread that heinous rumor about Kandi Burress, or when the screen went black and we heard the baby crying on Southern Charm, has there been such an episode of television where at every turn I had no fucking clue where it was going.
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Not only do these women deserve their flowers, but so does production. Busting in the room while Heather Gay was on the phone with her informant, having them all assemble on the beach like Avengers, playing a game with the dolls they made at the old-fashioned Mormon brunch, and throwing in thunderclaps wherever and whenever they could, it was top tier. A perfect episode.
Before we head into the explosive reunion episodes, I have questions. A lot of fucking questions.
- Where did Heather Gay get her yellow flowy dress, and will it be hung in the Smithsonian?
- Did Monica Garcia dye her hair blonde as a disguise when she went into Meredith Marks store? (side note, she should never be blonde again)
- When did Tanesha start working with Heather as her hairstylist?
- Did Heather ever confide in Tanesha and was that information used on @RealityVonTease?
- When Heather forgot her card at the store, was that a test to see if Monica would pay for her?
- Did Angie K have FOMO when all the women gathered on the beach to discuss Monica?
- Will Monica ever be back as a housewife (tbh, do we even want that)?
- Is Monica going to give Meredith Marks her clutch back? (assuming that, yes, Monica stole it)
- What treatments did Monica get done at Beauty Lab?
- How nervous was Heather to confront Monica?
- Why didn’t Monica show any remorse?
- Heather and the black eye, I need that whole story immediately
- Why did Heather defend someone who punched her in the face?
- Did producers know that Monica was RealityVonTease?
- Where do Heather and Tanesha stand now that this has all come to light?