Image Credit: Getty Images

Kate Middleton's Uncle Is A Reality TV Star And He's Ready To Spill The Tea

As someone who has never given a single fuck about the royal family, I, too, fell down the rabbit hole of the internet’s obsession with the Princess of Wale’s whereabouts. After months of speculating, the world is still asking: Is Kate Middleton okay? On March 4, the public received a vague update from Kensington Palace about how she “is unlikely to return to public duties until after Easter” due to a “planned abdominal surgery.” The secrecy behind the surgery has only spurned conspiracies from BBL to divorce rumors. It doesn’t help that King Charles can’t fart without the news cycle getting an update on his health, so what the hell is going on with Kate?! 

When asked what the Prince of Wales thinks about all the conspiracy theories, a spokesman for Prince Williams told People, “His focus is on his work and not on social media.” (Ironically, his job lately has been making memes.) 

In an unexpected turn of events, an uncle who refers to himself as a “bad boy” stepped forward to share an update on Kate’s health. So pour yourself a mug of English Breakfast, and let’s get into this tea. 

Who Is Kate Middleton’s Uncle Gary Goldsmith?

Kate Middleton's Uncle
Image Credit: Getty Images

A contestant on U.K. reality TV show Celebrity Big Brother, Gary Goldsmith is a self-made millionaire (I guess you gotta clarify when you’re related to imperialists). Married four times and infamously photographed with cocaine and a credit card in Ibiza, The Independent referred to him as “Kate Middleton’s playboy uncle.” His renowned villa is named “Maison de Bang Bang” complete with a mural that reads: “It’s Gary’s world, you just live in it.”  

But don’t confuse him as an icon, the guy pleaded guilty to assault against his fourth wife! In his intro video for the reality TV show, he admitted, “winding people up is probably my favorite hobby” and that he’s “an absolute nightmare” to live with. “There’s a reason I’ve had four wives.” Basically, this guy sucks. 

How Is Gary Goldsmith Related To Kate Middleton?

Gary is the youngest brother of Kate’s mom. The 58-year-old is considered the “black sheep” in the family, which only makes his character more intriguing. If this is giving you flashbacks of Megan Markle’s father, you’re not alone in this thought. Apparently, every royal by marriage has to have at least one crazy relative as part of a checks and balances system lol. 

Kate Middleton’s Uncle Comments On Her Health 

@bigbromemes I wonder what he knows? #katemiddleton #ekinsu #celebritybigbrother #foryou #uk #roylefamily ♬ original sound – Big Bro Memes

Fellow contestant on this season of Celebrity Big Brother, Ekin-Su Culculoglu asked Gary point blank: “Where’s Kate?” in an episode which aired on March 6. 

“So because she doesn’t want to talk about it… The last thing I’m going to do is… There is this kind of code of etiquette,” he responded. “If it’s announced, I’ll give you an opinion.”

“I hope she’s okay,” Ekin-Su said in a clear effort to prompt him further. Gary admitted he’d spoken to his sister, Kate’s mom. “She’s getting the best care in the world,” he confirmed. “All the family has done is put the wagons round and look after the family first, before anything else.”

Ekin-Su quickly followed up: “I’ve heard mixed things about Kate and I don’t want to make a comment, but whatever it is, do you want her to come back?”

“She’ll be back, of course she will,” Goldsmith replied. Many following along with the drama on Twitter remain unconvinced that Gary has an active relationship with his niece. In the meantime, I’ll continue to scroll through Kate Middleton conspiracy theories because, while I don’t care about the royal family, I love good gossip. 

Melanie Whyte
Melanie Whyte
Melanie Whyte (she/her) leads the lifestyle and relationship content at Betches. As an amateur New Yorker and professional bisexual, she enjoys writing about the bane of sex and relationships in the city. She is also perpetually in her messy house era despite spending all of her money on Instagram ads.