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This Is Proof We All Got Scammed By Travis And Kylie's 'Breakup'

It’s been two weeks since we found out about Travis Scott and Kylie Jenner’s breakup, but I still haven’t stopped thinking about it. Okay, I stopped thinking about it for a few days, but now I’m back, and I have a major theory about what’s going on here. I won’t pretend to have any insider info here (call me, Kris Jenner!), but I have to get this off my chest. You can choose to believe me or not, but I really think that Travis and Kylie’s breakup might be a publicity stunt. Shocking, I know!

I have a lot of random interests, and one of them happens to be keeping up with the Billboard music charts. The Hot 100 is the main chart for songs in the US, and the new chart comes out every Monday afternoon. So on Monday, I was enjoying my day off of work, when I got a notification that Travis Scott’s song “Highest In The Room” secured a #1 debut on the chart. Hitting #1 at all is a big deal, but debuting at the top of the Hot 100 is pretty rare, so good for Travis.

But seeing Travis Scott do such big chart number got me thinking. Travis is undoubtedly one of the biggest rappers in the world right now, but he hasn’t been releasing new music lately. This year, he’s been featured on a handful of songs, but he’s still mainly been riding high on the massive success of his last album Astroworld. With that in mind, it seems really, um, interesting that Travis would decide to drop his first solo single in over a year just THREE DAYS after news of his very high-profile breakup went public.

Of course, any single Travis Scott releases in 2019 is inevitably going to do well, but this isn’t just any single. There are lines in the song that refer specifically to the circumstances of his relationship issues with Kylie. He had to know that this type of content would be of great interest to the masses, but this is where the timeline gets even more interesting. We have no idea how far in advance the song was written, but Travis announced on September 30th that the song would be dropping on October 4th. That was a full day before TMZ broke the news of the breakup, in the evening of October 1st. DUN DUN DUN.

We also don’t know exactly when Kylie and Travis broke up for real, but Travis announcing the song really makes it seem like he knew when the breakup would be hitting the news. Listening to lyrics like “I’m doin’ a show, I’ll back soon, that ain’t what she wanna hear,” it’s hard to imagine the song making sense if we still thought Travis and Kylie were the happy couple from their Playboy cover just a month ago.

All of this timing would be suspect on its own, but my final straw in buying this whole thing was over the weekend, when a source told E! News that Travis and Kylie are “recovering from their break and are happy to spend time together again.” The source added that a reconciliation is “inevitable,” and that they “just needed some breathing room to work out a few of their issues.” Previously, another source also told ET that Travis and Kylie are “open to getting back together in the future.” Excuse me, Kris Jenner, I’d like a word.

If there’s even an ounce of truth to what these sources are saying, then I’m sorry, but we’ve all been punk’d. We’re supposed to believe that Travis and Kylie had some big breakup barely two weeks ago, and now they’re all good, and ready to be lovey-dovey again? That’s not how relationships work. Add the fact that Travis Scott just magically had a breakup song ready to go, and I’m really not buying it anymore. I’m glad he has another #1 record, and honestly I do really like the song, but it’s all a little too perfect. This has Kris Jenner written all over it, and she’s fooled us too many times before.

Basically, I give Travis and Kylie a few more weeks of doing their own thing, while anonymous sources spew stories of how they’re thinking really hard about whether being together is the right thing for their daughter. Maybe there will be a big public reunion, where Kylie posts a photo of Travis in her Lamborghini or something, or maybe they’ll do things more quietly. Either way, I don’t trust this family as far as I can throw them.

Images: Shutterstock

Dylan Hafer
Dylan Hafer has watched over 1000 episodes of Real Housewives because he has his priorities in order. Follow him on Instagram @dylanhafer and Twitter @thedylanhafer for all the memes you could ever want.