At the end of every year, Spotify Wrapped comes out with a list of the songs, artists, and albums that had their users in a chokehold all year long. Similarly, dating app Grindr puts out their Unwrapped results — a yearly survey to see what sex and dating trends their users are most obsessed with. And according to their survey, missionary was the sex position of 2024.
Now, this isn’t something that’s just prominent in the LGBTQ community. Missionary has been a fan fave for as long as… well, as long as people started getting on top of each other. And though to some, in a post-50 Shades era, where “chains and whips excite us” and we’re exploring literal monster smut, it’s shocking that something as “basic” and vanilla as missionary has made its way to the top of the list. But if you’re a sex connoisseur (like I like to consider myself), this news is anything but shocking.
Why Does Everyone Love Missionary?
“Missionary remains one of the most popular sex positions because it’s comfortable, accessible, versatile, and allows for intimacy,” Rhiannon John, sexologist at Bedbible.com tells Betches. “It’s a go-to for many people since it works whether you’re feeling low-energy or full of passion.”
Think about when you had sex for the first time — you were probably doing it in missionary weren’t you? (If you started in doggy, you’re wild.) That’s because it’s usually how we introduce ourselves to sex. I mean consider any sex scene you’ve ever seen in a TV show or movie (and no, we’re not talking about pornos).
“Culturally, media has positioned missionary as the ‘default,’ making it a natural starting point for many people — whether they’re new to sex or beginning a relationship with a new partner,” John says. “Over time, this familiarity can lead to a sense of comfort and connection with the position.”
And speaking from just a purely tactical sense, it’s one of the best ways to get the job done (the job, being you).
“Our bodies also naturally slot together into a missionary position, meaning that there’s no need for enhanced strength or power when thrusting and no need to hold yourself in a single position for an extended period,” Vicki Lyons, sexual wellness expert and chief editor at Bodyjoys tells Betches.
I mean, just think about how stable missionary is: It doesn’t matter if you’re on a sofa, a bed, or any other surface — you’re not going anywhere except probably deeper inside each other.
This means you’re usually in a pretty perfect position to hit your G-spot. Lyons explains that the penis naturally bends slightly in the direction of the G-spot (inside the wall of the vagina, in case you didn’t know), giving you a better chance at getting someone to climax.
Plus, let’s not forget all the grinding that goes on. “The grinding effect will also provide extra sensation to the outside of the vagina, rubbing easily against the clitoris and vulva to create dual sensation,” Lyons says.
But let’s not get confused: Missionary isn’t just great because it’s super convenient or just the logical place to start. Having sex in missionary can be pleasurable AF. The kissing, the eye contact, the closeness — they all come together for a delicious combination of some really great, intimate sex.
“Eye contact enhances the emotional connection and makes for a much more sensual experience,” Lyons says. “It also opens up the avenue to kissing and more intimate sexual acts such as caressing the breasts and nipples.”
And I mean, we all know just how incredibly sexy eye contact can be — especially with a partner you’re extremely attracted to or have strong feelings for.
“When you maintain eye contact during intimate moments, it creates a powerful sense of being seen and understood, amplifying emotional and physical intimacy,” John explains. “It can feel exhilarating because it requires a level of trust and openness, exposing your authentic self in a raw and vulnerable way.”
But if you notice that despite how wonderful, intimate, and just plain awesome missionary is, it’s getting a bit stale because it’s all you and your partner ever do, don’t fret. There are plenty of ways to spice up missionary.
How To Improve Missionary Position
While there are plenty of variations of missionary position, you don’t even have to lift a leg or arm to make the sex even better. Your best bet? Sex toys. Toys are a really great way to take your missionary sex from great to orgasmically delicious.
“Toys like wearable vibrators, where the vibrator sits inside the vagina, with some also having another vibrating arm that sits on the clitoris for double stimulation, can be a great way to spice up the missionary position for both partners,” John says.
But if you want to keep things super simple, John suggests incorporating edging into your next sexy-time session. If you’ve never tried edging, it’s just getting your partner to the point of orgasm, but stopping everything before they go over the edge. By doing this (sometimes even a few times), you’re not only heightening the pleasure but also driving them crazy with desire.
“This may increase the sensation of orgasm when it occurs, as well as extend the duration of sex,” John explains.
And after all that, if missionary still isn’t your thing… you’re probably not doing it right. This is a pro-missionary household and anyone who says otherwise is simply wrong.
