Have you ever wanted to match your antacids with your dinner outfit? Well, Tums has officially solved this problem for you — whether you asked for it or not. In collaboration with artist Nik Bentel, the designer behind the viral Pasta Bag, the heartburn relief brand has launched The TUMS Bag. This limited edition purse directly mimics a Chewy Bites bottle. (In an unofficial office survey, majority of Betches agree that we pop chewy bites like candy!)
If you’re worried capitalism has gone too far, think again. What’s better than a designer bag that shouts to the world: “I’m a hot girl with IBS.” Nothing, I tell you, nothing! This year, the food-themed aesthetic — from pickle girls to blueberry milk nails — was a big hit. So why not add over-the-counter medication accessories that pair perfectly with the uncontrollable indigestion?
When my bag arrived at my doorstep, I was impressed to find it came with a dust bag, a staple for high-end luxury products (I mean, you’d hope so for $200). And tucked inside its blue suede interior was an actual bottle of chewy bites. The attention to detail!!! As an IBS girlie myself, I can’t think of a better accessory for a dinner date.
So, if you need the perfect statement piece for your holiday party or want a date conversation starter that isn’t “Um, what do you do for work?” look no further. Scared of its potential? Here’s how to style it to get the attention it deserves.
Let Its Colors Pop
There’s no excuse that it doesn’t match with anything you own when it has almost every goddamn primary color. I wore a semi-sheer dress that was primarily blue with accents of red and green, then threw a chartreuse leather jacket over it so people would bask in my glow of eclectic taste. Feel free to copy my maximalist take or let the statement piece shine with a simple fit.
Embrace The Silver Trend
Silver is the trend in 2024. The chrome hard shell will match all your newly purchased accessories. (Haha, isn’t fast fashion fun?!) In the worst case, the shiny exterior can double as a mirror so you can check your teeth after dinner.
Play With The Straps And Chains
Yes, that subhead was an innuendo because nothing screams SEX like Irritable Bowel Syndrome. But stay focused! The bag comes with two ways to wear it. The shorter metal chain lets you wear it as a clutch, while the longer chromed leather strap gives it more versatility. I kept the chain on the bag to provide an added texture while wearing it cross-body.
Eat A Big Meal
When repping heartburn relief, you’ve gotta push your tummy to the limit. Order the spiciest dish on the menu! Join a traveling improv troupe despite your crippling stage fright! Call your mom and ask her to list how you’ve disappointed her — in detail! Those stress burps aren’t going to trigger themselves.