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Why 'RHOP' Stacey And TJ's Relationship Is... Not My Favorite

I’m grateful for a lot of things this holiday season, but one of the very top is that The Real Housewives of Potomac is watchable again. This season isn’t drama-free by any means (Karen is dealing with her pending DUI case, Gizelle is recovering from the loss of her father and Mia is deep in the trenches with Gordon and Inc). But, it is back to the fun shade that made us Google “Where is Potomac?” eight seasons ago. One brilliant new addition is Bravo rookie, Stacey Rusch, who “isn’t the airhead she pretends to be,” to use Gizelle’s words. Stacey is bubbly, she’s different, and she definitely can’t dance. But what she lacks in swag, she makes up for with the skill she uses to disarm the other ladies as she politely clocks their tea. One element of the Stacey equation that is not giving, however, is her Erkel-inspired love interest, Thomas Anthony Jones. TJ and Stacey are in a situationship that I can only describe as “friends with no benefits” and, um, it’s far from my favorite thing about her. I’m asking all the hard questions to break down Stacey and TJ’s relationship, including if Stacey and TJ are still together.

Stacey And TJ’s Relationship

Are Stacey and TJ still together?

stacey rusch
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Stacey confirmed to Bravo that she and TJ are still an item as of November 2024. It seems he is now officially her boyfriend.

Are Stacey and TJ having sex?

The Real Housewives of Potomac Stacey
Image Credit: Getty Images

According to TJ’s rules set out in his season 9 RHOP debut, they won’t have sex until they’re married. Listen, I know you shouldn’t yuck anyone’s yum, and I have to respect TJ’s personal decisions regarding his faith, but the fact that Stacey is a grown-ass woman with a child in the middle of a divorce makes celibacy at this stage in her life a wee bit confusing. In fact, she herself doesn’t seem totally sold on the premise, which is the real problem here. Stacey is just stepping back into the dating pool, the time when she should be living it up more than ever, and the guy she’s interested in refuses to touch her (like have we even ever seen them hold hands let alone get a little frisky??).

Actually, everything about TJ is more serious than fun, like how Stacey needs to pay attention to him at the dinner table at all times, or it’s somehow disrespectful. (Sidenote: I hate when men call their girlfriends “man,” “bro,” or anything of the like considering the stunning correlation between guys that whine like that and still demand submissive traditional norms in their household). In order for Stacey and TJ to graduate to the next step of their relationship, which let’s face it is tied to sexual compatibility, she’d have to dive into another marriage, something she’s said that she’s not sure she’ll ever do again. On his end, TJ didn’t make a compelling case to the rest of the crew at Karen’s Love Lagoon. that once they do go there it’ll be worth the wait.

Stacey is a bit of a type A queen (takes one to know one) and the last thing she needs after getting out of a lengthy relationship that clearly didn’t work for her is a whole set of instant rules from a brand-new guy. Rules that happen to come with very little reward. Shouldn’t her next steps in the world of dating be more How Stella Got Her Groove Back than Why Did I Get Married? Seriously, Stacey girl, what are you getting out of this? TJ’s not pleased with her behavior at parties when she’s working the room like the social butterfly she is nor pleasing her when they’re home alone. Their “dates” have mostly been lifting weights at the gym, hanging out in her kitchen, and Stacey taking TJ to cool events so, I’m sorry, what in the world is she getting out of this arrangement??

TJ is in LA half the time, admittedly doing whatever he wants when he’s out of her sight. Even though Stacey is a grown and sexy lady with her own life to live, TJ has promised to lose interest if she decides to entertain another man who could bring something else to the table she may want to experience. Basically, Stacey was being held to the wifey standard before she even got the girlfriend treatment, and I am not here for it. Maybe now that they’re official, things have fallen together in the privacy of Stacey’s gorgeous home she earned with her QVC bucks. But I need Thomas Anthony Jones and his black mesh muscle shirt to prove it at the reunion.

Marissa Dow
MARISSA is a trending news writer at Betches. She's more than just another pop-culture-addicted-east-coaster-turned-LA-transplant...she's also an upcoming television writer and aspiring Real Housewife (whichever comes first). Live, laugh, balegdah.