Yesterday morning, you might have heard a very low shattering somewhere off in the distance. That was the sound of the hearts of Bachelor Nation collectively crumbling when Peter Kraus was not announced as the next Bachelor, and instead Arie Whatever-The-Fuck-His-Last-Name-Is was confirmed as the new lead. Whether you’re an Arie hater or a fucking weirdo fan, we’ve all got to accept this loss eventually. Personally, I’m still in the denial phase of the grief process. The producers took the Bachelor gig away from Luke to give to Nick, who’s to say they won’t come to their senses and actually give the people what they want this time? But enough about how we feel. How does Peter feel? There were tons of rumors: that Peter wanted to be the Bachelor, that he didn’t want it, that he refused to propose at the end and it created a feud between him and the producers. Well Peter’s speaking out in light of the new announcement, and here’s what he has to say.
In a statement to E! News, Peter’s manager said, “Peter is very happy about the way things turned out and is happy for Arie. He thinks ABC made a great choice.” Ugh. Makes one of us. He continued, “Peter is going to focus on his passion, helping people through fitness and wellness. He is very thankful for the opportunity he was given with The Bachelorette. Things are going to be great for Peter Kraus fitness and his boot camps moving forward.” I mean, he’s not wrong. Before The Bachelorette, Peter was just a hot guy with a fitness business. Now he’s a hot guy America loves with a fitness business and a FabFitFun sponsorship. I hate to say this, but maybe this is good for Peter.
Peter also shared his feelings on the Bachelor franchise in a very emotional Instagram post. It’s long, so you might want to pop an Adderall.
This is basically a hot emotionally unavailable dude’s way of saying “Dream as if you’ll live forever. Live as if you’ll die today.” Also Peter is clearly still in love with Rachel. Ugh, forget The Notebook, Peter and Rachel is clearly the love story of the century. Look what he wrote about her. LOOK AT IT. You’d be hard-pressed to find any guy who would write about his current girlfriend that way, let alone a girl who dumped him on national television. Maybe love is real? IDK. I’m not sobbing, you’re sobbing!
Um. So. Anyway. Yeah. Peter isn’t the next Bachelor, probably never will be, and 2017 is a fiery hellscape. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to search for the will to continue living.
