Last week we talked about what the girls who go on The Bachelor eat (answer: not very much) and how they exercise to stay so skinny. But that really only covers half of the question, “How are they all so much prettier than me?” Okay, so like, maybe that’s a me problem. But still, what are they all doing with their hair and makeup? Is there hope for any of us to ever look like one of the Laurens competing for Arie’s love, short of getting plastic surgery (and in Arie’s case, a lobotomy)? Read on because I researched the Bachelor contestants’ beauty regimens and found craziest shit these girls do in the name of beauty.
Almost all of the contestants have fake lashes. It’s easier and they look chic af on camera. You can buy the little glue-on ones from the drugstore that you wore for prom and your dance shows in elementary school, but if you want to look Bachelor level hot, you have to go for the eyelash extensions. Rachel Lindsay just bought lashes from Sephora and CVS, and let me tell you, I spent her entire season of The Bachelorette complaining about how much I hated her lashes. They were distracting. This is the difference between slapping on one piece of furry shit to your eyes and having a professional attach individual hairs to your lash line in a carefully curated way. If you’re going to do this, do it right. They’re pricey af, running from $120-$300 based on material, and you get them done about every 3 weeks. But you know, your eyes look done 24/7, you don’t have to put on mascara, and you’re always camera ready.
Somehow even in Paradise weather, all the girls’ makeup is flawless the entire time. They also only have makeup artists on the first day and last day (unless you’re the Bachelor/Bachelorette), so how do they do their makeup so professionally every day in between? None of them ever even have shiny foreheads.
Olivia Caridi, for instance, actually hired a makeup artist to teach her how to do her makeup and contour like a pro before she went on the show. Even more hilarious: she apparently bought white and nude eyeliners to put on while sleeping, just in case the cameras caught her. That, I think, is too much, but if you want your hookup to think you’re as perfect as a Bachelor girl at all times, this is how you do it. Also, stop letting your hookups sleep over. Send them home when you’re done with them. That is just good life advice.
Ashley I. gave up her bootleg Kardashian vibes for Paradise, sticking to foundation, mascara, highlighter, and lip since it’s so hot you sweat it off anyway. At night, though, she’d pull out the full contour. She uses Benefit’s Hoola Matte Bronzer to contour and bakes with Ben Nye Powder. I don’t even know what baking means, so yeah, look it up.
Having perfect skin is essential to looking flawless on TV and IRL, so take care of it. Corinne Olympios, queen of nannies and cheese pasta, stresses the importance of a good moisturizer.
Amanda Stanton gets facials on a regular basis (at The Facial Lounge in Orange County, CA) and doesn’t wear makeup unless she needs to. She also has lash extensions so it’s basically cheating the whole no-makeup thing.
Jojo spends a small fortune on skincare products. She uses: IS Clinical Active Serum, Dr. Dennis Gross Extra Strength Daily Peel Pads, Laura Mercier Illuminating Tinted Moisturizer, and she also does not wear cheap foundation, opting for La Mer Soft Fluid Foundation. I get her point—spend more to have perfect skin and then you don’t have to buy a bunch of stuff to try to cover up your ruined skin afterwards.
Becca Tilley recommends washing your face every night. Groundbreaking, Becca, thank you so much for your insight. You should be a dermatologist. She uses very basic and simple cleanser Cetaphil. Much like her personality.
I still majorly resent Caila for the whole Jared thing and because she was so indecisive and I find that VERY annoying, but she does have beautiful hair. I will give her that one little thing. She does her curls with a 1 1/4″ iron barrel and starts them about halfway through her mane to keep them loose.
JoJo also subscribes to the 1 1/4″ curling iron as the correct iron size, but she makes sure to curl in different directions and “always away” from her face. She then follows up with a dry texture spray. Jojo, you chose the wrong man, but at least your hair looks amazing.
Britt Nilsson, she who sleeps in her makeup, also unsurprisingly never washes her hair, limiting it to only once or twice a week. This helps your hair from losing too much oil and keeps it healthy and shiny. It also preserves your color if you dye your hair. So there are definite perks to being gross. Bust out the dry shampoo, at least.
Now all you need is a casual $40,000 to buy all the outfits they purchase before the show and you’ll look just as desperate for a husband as any of them!