Adios, Leo Season: Weekend Horoscopes Aug. 23-25

Adios, Leo season—bring on the Virgo bitches. We only have a week or so left of August, then it’s on to pumpkin spice September, spooky October, turkey-trotting November, and oh sh*t we need to go holiday shopping December. With Leo season on the outs and the virgin sign making its presence known, the air signs are feeling super powerful and the rest of the signs are benefiting from the change. Here’s what’s in store this weekend, according to the sky.


It’s finally your time to f*cking shine, Virgo. Jazz snaps all around. Whatever you end up doing this weekend, your friends, family, and coworkers (or whoever you’re hanging with) will be super stoked about just being in your company. It’s like, because of the sun, Venus, and Mars all in your sign, everyone just wants to soak up your awesomeness. As a sidenote, Saturday night and Sunday may see you being needed by a close friend or partner who is going through some sh*t, so be prepared to offer a shoulder to cry on and a pizza to stress eat.


Prepare for clarity, Libra. You’ve been dealing with a tough-ish relationship with someone close for a few years, and it seems like this Friday and Saturday will finally present a chance to clear things up. Sunday morning is a great time to eat waffles, drink a lot of coffee, and just think on some deep sh*t, like where you’re going in your career or why you dated Chad in college. Look inward, betch.


Some weird, but welcome sh*t may go down this weekend, Scorpio. People you’ve been close to friendship-wise may turn into more than that, and you need to weigh if that’s a super chill thing or not. Overall, your relationships are facing some changes and upheaval this weekend, so whether you have a crush, have been arguing with a family member, or are majorly shipping someone who used to be just a friend, be on the lookout for those feelings and approach with care.


Confusion is in the air, Sagittarius. It can play to your advantage, though, if you’re sensing a partner needs to talk some sh*t out. Conversation can be super beneficial for clearing things up, and you may find that Saturday lends itself beautifully to open and honest communication.


Time to get in the car and f*cking go, Capricorn. Traveling Friday through Sunday will combine the stars’ promises of a good time with the planets’ promises of a sexy time. Yes, really. Your romance and creative juices are coming together (ew?) so it’s a great weekend to grab your lover, hit the road, and do some weird sh*t you’ve been too afraid to try. Butt stuff? Handcuffs? What-the-f*ck ever, Capricorn. You do you.


Sexy time is in the cards, Aquarius. Your partner is chatty and maybe even a little dramatic on Friday and Saturday, and, because the stars are f*cking weird, that could result in some mind-blowing sex. I mean, sounds great.


Team work makes the dream work, Pisces. Did we all throw up together? Grool. Partners in life and business make for amazing sounding boards this weekend when it comes to your career goals. Don’t be afraid to bounce ideas off of everyone and anyone you think could present some creative solutions.


Jobs suck, Aries, so take the weekend to chill tf out. Just remember that while, yes, doing nothing all day would be hella sweet, your current living situation and ability to eat out whenever you want is kind of dependent on the whole real job and work thing. So take the weekend to relax, go to the spa, or whatever. Rest and reset before Monday because, yes, you do need to work, bitch.


Surprises are in store this weekend, Taurus, especially when it comes to the romantic side of life (or, like, your lack thereof). Take the weekend to get tf off social media and focus on the people and things around you. Plant a tree, walk your doggo (or adopt three more), or visit some cute elderly people. Saturday is a great day to pay it forward.


You’re ready for action, Gemini. That could come in the way of a riveting club outing and evening with the girls or a romantic getaway with your love. Whatever you do, your friends or partners are feeling especially generous toward you, so don’t, like, be afraid to ask them to buy your drinks or mozzarella sticks or whatever.


You’re feeling mysterious af, Cancer. But keeping your emotions close will actually allow you to explore your feelings about literally everything this weekend. Don’t be afraid to hang out at home and cancel plans in order to really hone in on what you want. Once you give yourself some time, Saturday night and Sunday look promising for fun and awesome communication (and probs drinking) with friends.


You’re feeling, like, so fun, Cancer. Be the party planning committee this weekend and round up the usual suspects in terms of friends and family. Including someone who usually feels left out will pay off, too, plus you’ll feel super good about yourself cause you’re just so nice.

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Sarah Nowicki
Sarah Nowicki
Sarah Nowicki aka Betchy Crocker writes about food, fashion, and whatever else she's in the mood to complain about for Betches and like, some other people. She resides in Asheville, NC, where she spends her time judging hipsters and holding on to her Jersey heritage and superiority. Yell at her on Instagram @sarahnowicholson