5 Etiquette Rules You Need To Know Before Registering For Your Wedding

When it comes to planning a wedding, practically every step of the way is overwhelming. When’s the last time you actually put something in the literal mail? Do you even know where to buy stamps? You can’t even decide what to order for lunch, let alone what kind of meal to serve at dinner. At least registering for your wedding is super easy, because you’re used to asking people to buy you stuff.

Right? Wrong.

Like posing for a candid photo, registering for your wedding is something that is probably way more difficult than it needs to be if you don’t think about what you need to do ahead of time. Here are a few tips for making the whole process much easier.

1. Register ASAP

I know we’re all used to ordering sh*t off of Amazon Prime and having it arrive like, five minutes later, but registering for your wedding is one thing you really shouldn’t procrastinate. It might sound like a hardo move, but you can actually register pretty soon after you get engaged, especially if friends or family members want to get you a gift for some of the earlier celebrations in the neverending spectacle that will become your wedding.

2. Know The Rules Of Etiquette

Even though you can’t procrastinate, your guests actually can. According to like, old school wedding etiquette, wedding guests can gift give up to a year after the wedding, so it’s a good idea to leave your registry up past the “I do.” Ask your Lilly Pulitzer-wearing aunt.

Another etiquette-related issue: you’re not really supposed to straight-up ask people to buy you things. It’s technically a faux pas to put your registry on your wedding invitation. Instead, you can put your wedding website on a details card that you include in your invitation suite, and you can include your registry information there. If someone else is throwing you a bridal shower, they can include registry information on the invite, no problem. (P.S., I worked at a wedding stationery company, I promise I’m not just pulling this out of my ass.)

3. You Can Actually Ask For People To Pay For Random Stuff

Remember the bride who went viral for asking everyone to contribute $1,500 to her wedding budget? She wasn’t that far off. Okay, just kidding. She was f*cking insane.

But actually, you can ask your guests to contribute to your honeymoon, savings for something like IVF (if you’re like, trying to have kids on purpose) or a lifetime supply of avocados. Yup, people actually do that. Two out of three couples who register on Zola have some sort of cash contribution set up, and a lot of those are designated for a specific thing.

4. But Like, Don’t Forget The Classic Things

Your wedding registry isn’t your Instagram feed, so you don’t have to try to impress everyone by making it interesting. Really. You can just put normal stuff that you want on there, and it’ll be way easier for everyone involved. Don’t forget traditional items you’ll probably need in your new life as an actual married adult, like sh*t for your kitchen… which, yes, you can ask for in aesthetically pleasing colors.

Until death do us part, the most popular registry gift is always going to be the KitchenAid stand mixer. It’s so classic, and couples today are registering for ‘trendy’ colors like copper, millennial pink and sky blue,” said Zola wedding expert Jennifer Spector. “Specialty kitchen gadgets are also having a moment right now; millennial couples are loving appliances like the Instant Pot, airfryers, and sous vides.”

5. Basically, Just Give Everyone A Ton Of Options

You won’t look really spoiled if you ask for a bunch of stuff on your wedding registry, especially if you keep a variety of price points. Remember that the guests attending your wedding will likely be people who know you very well and want to splurge on an amazing gift, but there will also be people who may not want to drop a ton of money on you, like your coworker who is kind of only there because she has to be. Guests would much rather have a myriad of options so they can feel like they’re truly giving you something that is appropriate for the relationship you share, but also like they’re spending money on something that they like, too.

Images: Giphy (3)

Hannah Chambers
Hannah Chambers
Hannah Chambers is one of those people whose entire personality consists of Real Housewives references, taking pictures of her dog, and drinking out of an obnoxiously large water bottle. You can find her work in Cosmopolitan, Bustle,, and more. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter @hanchambers