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Welcome to Libra Season: Weekly Horoscopes September 23-27

Goodbye Virgo, hello Libra! Not only are we transitioning between astrological seasons, but it’s also the fall equinox, meaning big things for just about every sign. Libra is associated with balance, beauty, and social life, so don’t be surprised if you find yourself turning out looks, staying out later, and networking harder. This season is all about putting yourself out there and reaping the benefits, so yes, you do have permission to call every happy hour a “business opportunity.” You never know what kind of deals can be struck over one to five cocktails!

Aries

Aries and Libra are opposite each other on the Zodiac wheel, meaning there’s going to be a lot of action in your house of relationships starting like, yesterday. Yes, love is in the air, but so is friendship. And frenemy-ship. And basically any other “ship” under the Sun. Now is a good time to resolve any questions around important relationships in your life (For example: “Do I like him or is he just tall?”) so you can go into winter without all the baggage weighing you down.

Taurus

Libra season has you on a self-care kick, and considering Taurus’ whole thing is self-care, you’re basically a human bath bomb right now. Yep, you’re taking bubble baths at 2pm. Yes, you’re wearing yoga pants to work. No, you’re not giving any f*cks. Is putting on a face mask midway through an important meeting unorthodox? Sure. But who ever got anywhere by playing by the rules? Also, it’s not your fault you love yourself enough to know when your skin needs to be hydrated.

Gemini

Well, well, well Gemini, aren’t you fancy? Libra season has you wanting to take in some art and culture like the cosmopolitan bitch you are, so it’s time to dust off that old museum pass and look at some paintings of flowers! You’re starving for new artistic stimulation this week whether it be in the form of checking out a new movie, seeing some local music, or just walking around the park with a vape pen and thinking about what it would be like to live in a painting. At the very least you’ll get some good Instas out of it.

Cancer

Dust off your “future is female” shirt, Cancer, because Libra season has you tapping deep into your feminine energy. (And yes, that goes for any men who might be reading this as well.) Cancer has always had group mom vibes, and Libra season has you leaning even harder into those maternal instincts. Set up a night with your favorite ladies ASAP (preferably on a full Moon and when you’re all on your periods), and don’t be surprised if you have to fight the urge to pack snacks for everyone, just in case they get hungry.

Leo

Not that you’ve been shy in other seasons, but Libra season has you extra social this month. And an extra social Leo is usually just extra. You’re tapping into some seriously community-oriented vibes right now, meaning you can toss any thoughts you had of staying in this week out the window. Actually, you might wanna go ahead and start a group text for a 20 person bottomless mimosa Sunday brunch right now. You’re definitely going to want it.

Virgo

Your season is over, and that’s sad, Virgo, but don’t despair! Now that Libra’s in the spotlight you can focus your intense logical brain on what really matters: making it rain. It’s time to get serious and get ahead in all things financial so that you don’t go into the holiday season trying to give out macaroni crafts as gifts like you’re five. Take a look at your budget now and see where you can scale back. (Hint: Postmates and Uber are always a good place to start.)

Libra

Welcome to your season, betch! It’s time to bask in the glow of a Libra Sun. But before you do, it’s time to take out the trash. Now is the perfect time of year for you to leave the past behind you and let go of the exes, grudges, and f*ckbois that have been holding you back from reaching your true potential. With the Sun in your sign, you have the mental clarity you need to tell all that past negativity to GTFO and be the badass Libra of the future. As an added bonus, finally deleting all those pictures of you and your ex in Italy will free up space on your phone for thirst traps.

Scorpio

Slow your damn roll, Scorpio! Libra season is asking you to wind it the f*ck down and inject your life with some much-needed chill. You’re in search of some serious grounding energy, and nothing says “grounded” like staying at home when your friends are all out doing something fun. Cancel those plans now and enjoy a 100% FOMO-less night of re-watching Fleabag and eating anything in your eyeline. I promise the only thing you’ll miss are picklebacks you didn’t need to be taking anyway.

Sagittarius

You’ve been killing it in your career lately, Sagittarius, but how’s your social life? Non-existent? Yeah, time to fix that. Luckily, super-friendly Libra is here to get you out of your shell and back in the game. Next time you’re invited to an after work event,
go, and not just so you can track down your coworker to go over your project a few more times. Have fun. Seriously. Work will be right where you left it at 9am tomorrow morning, no matter how many times we all wish that wasn’t the case.

Capricorn

Libra season has you leaning into your Slytherin tendencies, making you ambitious as f*ck. The new season is turbo-charging your career, and you’re not letting any opportunities pass you by. If a chance for you to network pops up, you’re taking it. If a situation arises where you can impress your boss, you’re there. Just don’t like, align with any dark wizards to help take over the world or anything. That’s a little much.

Aquarius

The new season has you tapping into your hippie tendencies, meaning you’re all about vibes right now, man. Whether it be treating yourself to a Groupon for reiki, popping into a crystal shop, or yes, reading your horoscopes on Betches.com, you’re actively seeking out a higher plane of consciousness. Just maybe steer clear of the psychedelics during the work week? You’re not at Burning Man.

Pisces

Ow-ow! Libra is chilling in your house of seduction all month, Pisces, so to use a reference from 2006, you’re bringing sexy back. The skirts are shorter. The heels are higher. And your ‘close friends’ insta story is basically a softcore porn site. Don’t be surprised if you have people from all corners sliding into your DMs, and remember the age-old proverb: don’t say yes to anything until you know his credit card number.

Images: Giphy (12)

Alise Morales
Alise Morales
Alise Morales is a comedy writer and performer. She is the writer of the Betches Sup Newsletter and co-host of the Betches Sup Podcast.