The Betches’ Bachelorette Guide To The Hamptons

Planning sucks, and bachelorette parties are a ton of work. So we’re taking all the guesswork out of planning a bachelorette party by breaking down top bachelorette destinations. Our guides will tell you where to stay, eat, party, how to get around, and give you a sample itinerary that you can follow. You’re welcome. 

If you’ve ever seen an episode of Summer House, you understand why everyone’s so obsessed with the Hamptons. And even if you haven’t, we’re here to tell you why a Hamptons-style bachelorette is the best idea ever. Long considered to be a bougie playground for Manhattan’s elite, it’s now more accessible to everyone with the same goal in mind these days: getting drunk and having fun. Plus there are clambakes, pool parties, dance-all-night-with-your-feet-in-the-sand ragers, postcard-worthy beaches, cute AF towns, and a million places to wine and dine during your debaucherous celebratory pre-nuptials bash. Honestly, I’d rather be there right now than writing this article, that’s how awesome the Hamptons is. But for first timers, it can be a bit overwhelming considering there are all these different “hamlets,” also known as small villages. Southampton, East Hampton, Bridgehampton, Montauk…if you’re all WTF, have no fear. We’re breaking down everywhere worth visiting in this official Betches’ Bachelorette Guide to the Hamptons.

How To Get There

The Hamptons is never easy to get to per se—unless you’ve got extra cash laying around to hop on a private heli Blade. After that, the next best thing is a car. Comfort, your own tunes, maybe a stocked cooler in the glove compartment (JK we don’t condone that), but the arduous trek to the Hamptons is just less painful in a car. If wheels aren’t plausible—or no one wants to be the DD #fair—then from NYC your options are: the Jitney (there’s free WiFi! and snacks! and hottie businessmen in whimsical loafers!) or the LIRR. The downside to the Jitney can be traffic, especially if you leave late on a summer Friday. Play that one smart and depart during the day/as early as it starts running. The downside to the train is it can be crowded AF (see the above timing explanation), and I once stood the entire way. Not fun. If you do train, you can reach Westhampton (the first stop) in two hours, but Montauk (the end of the line) will run you three, so pack extra booze and pray your car has a bathroom that’s semi-functioning. The Jitney can be two to five hours depending on traffic, and where you’re going, but unlike the LIRR (which only departs from Penn station in Manhattan), there are 18 pickup stops in Manhattan and two airport connections. As for prices, they’re pretty cheap (around $25-35 for the Jitney and $20-30 for the LIRR), so unless you’re coming from out of town and have to buy a plane ticket (sucks for you), this will be the cheapest expense of your trip.

How To Get Around

Uber, and you damn well better put aside a substantial chunk of change for them. Fact: Uber is a rip-off in the Hamptons. They issue a a base fare, then a per minute fare, then a per mile fare, and don’t even think about canceling when you’re wasted and about to fall over in heels trying to find your car, because there are steep fees for that. Our advice? Try to eat, drink, and party in whichever town you’re staying in, and if you’re going to hop around, plan your day in that area. Lastly, look for local car services that offer discounts for larger groups, as well as affordable bachelorette party limos.

Where To Stay

Some of the best deals for bach parties (house wise) can be found on Airbnb because you’ll have a whole house to yourself, you can blast your music as loud as you want (until the cops show up), and it’s honestly just cheaper. But having to moonlight as the front desk, concierge, housekeeping, in-room dining, and bell hop when you’re supposed to be playing pin-the-D-on-things and slamming tequila shots sorta sucks. When you need someone to take care of all the details for you, check out these hotels.

The Surf Lodge: Montauk is arguably where most of the action is in the Hamptons these days, at least for betches on the hunt for pool parties, beach clubs, live music, good food, and booze. The Surf Lodge has it all, but more importantly they exude a laidback, IDGAF mentality that makes people want to check in here and never leave. Think of it as Hawaii, but closer. The rooms and suites are fitted with surfer-themed art, sun-bleached floors, shady hammocks, and private balconies, and the communal areas have all these cool beachy knick-knacks you’ll want to steal, but shouldn’t. There’s also free bike rental, a deck made for imbibing after you rolled up from a swim, and a damn fine restaurant that will be your bach HQ during your stay. Three words: mini lobster rolls.

What made The Surf Lodge famous in the first place was their music program, and you’ll be happy to know that hasn’t slowed down at all. You’ll find concerts going strong every Saturday and Sunday, featuring top-notch talent like John Legend, Lupe Fiasco, St. Lucia, and Lykke Li. And correct us if we’re wrong, but we’re pretty sure there’s no better way to stumble home from a concert inebriated than across the sand to your bedroom door. Add THAT to the list of positives when you book these accommodations for the weekend.

Quogue Club at Hallock House: With only 14 guest rooms (including two cottages), this historic inn feels intimate, classy, and a little less annoying than Montauk. If you’re going the laidback bach route, TQC makes total sense, It’s also a no-brainer if you want to stay closer to Southampton (only 10 miles away), waste less money on lodging (you can find crazy rates here, especially in shoulder seasons), and can’t deal with spending your entire weekend in a car driving to and from The End—that’s local lingo for Montauk. The main foyer is also prime for staging “you can’t sit with us” pics of the bride and her squad…take notice.

And if you’re thinking “why Quogue”, well, this hamlet might not get as much love as the others, but with a close proximity to less-crowded beaches, shopping, restaurants and the North Fork wineries where you’re going to get classy wine drunk have a memorable time with your crew, what more do you really need? Plus, they have a sizable bar and porch made for pregaming (and making new friends) and The Club, their onsite restaurant, is the ideal setting for dinner before you head out for the night.

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Foyer #hamptons

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Gurney’s: What can we say about Gurney’s? If you’re trying to bougie it up on the bach, Gurney’s Montauk Resort & Seawater Spa is where you check in. Sure the prices are steep—kiss your savings adios—but isn’t a slightly blurry Insta at the end of the dock with your baes worthy it? Their more chill sister property, Star Island Resort & Marina, is another option, which includes a new dock-to-dish seasonally focused seafood restaurant, Showfish, and the largest marina in the Hamptons.

The four newly reimagined Beach Cottages at the Montauk Resort can sleep four to eight, feature a private decks overlooking the ocean with epic views, and some have a kitchenette or fireplace. Talk about bach goals. Just try not to pass out on the terrace, k? The beds are much more comfortable. And when you peel yourself out of said bed, you can saunter down to the hottest beach club in Montauk, on their own white sand beach, no less. That’s where the beats are spinning and the bottle service is flowing.

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Let's lounge. Photo | @fashionstylefoodie

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Where To Eat

Calissa: Some Hamptons mainstays will lock the doors when they see a flock of bachelorettes coming—don’t even think about pulling your party bus up to Wölffer Kitchen, for that matter—but Water Mill-based Calissa holds them wide open. In fact, they even offer packages and dinner specials specifically for bachelorette parties. Start with a Prosecco toast for the bride-to-be, followed by unlimited rosé, and a four-course dinner, which includes specialties like Greek mezze platters, chicken souvlaki, and fresh Montauk fish. If you’re still standing after that, round out the night with after-dinner drinks and bottle service in the lounge. Every summer Saturday is Greek Riviera night featuring DJ JStef, so get ready to take all the ouzo shots and dance like you’re living your best Hamptons life.

Silver Lining Diner: What better way to start another day in paradise than at the diner? Silver Lining isn’t your average greasy spoon, either. What used to be the Princess Diner in Southampton (that dates back to 1957), is now a full-fledged gastronomic operation helmed by chef Eric Miller. Think homemade jam and freshly baked bread, a serious Bloody Mary you’re going to be needing several of, mouthwatering eggies (their version of souped-up breakfast sandwiches), Benedicts with crispy crab cakes and smoked salmon, omelets, and an upside-down German pancake with apples and cinnamon that will blow your mind. Old-school diner sundaes are an obvious way to end this (well worth it) food coma experience.

Highway Restaurant & Bar: File this one under classy dinner with the girls. Situated on Montauk Highway in East Hampton, the decor is coastal chic and the seasonally-driven cuisine is just as smart—and delish—as their buzzed-about rep suggests. Live your best life over flutes of champagne and sautéed langoustines, or try one of their globally-influenced dishes like papaya and crab salad (with peanuts, lemongrass, and fresno chili) and pan-roasted salmon with tabbouleh and harissa. Japanese hot spot Shuko also has a pop-up on the premises (Shuko Beach), should you want to be return visitors. That is, if your group behaves well enough the first time.

Tutto il Giorno: With outposts in Sag Harbor and Southhampton, you have two good reasons to visit Tutto, which is Italian for seriously insane food. Okayyyy, it’s not, but it should be. Donna Karan’s daughter owns it, so you know it’s going to be major. The garden is downright dreamy, so wear something cute and try not to stain it when licking your plate clean of Sardinian flat bread, linguine alle vongole, and eggplant parm that tastes just like nonna’s.

Morty’s Oyster Stand: Obviously, any place that has “Morty’s” and “Oyster Stand” in the name is our jam for a low-key lunch or happy hour. Couple that with the fact that there’s some big name talent behind these humble digs, and you have yourself a winner. Hospitality vet Charles Seich of Ferris in NYC and notable chef Sam Talbot took over the former Cyril’s space in Amagansett, and now they’re churning out a menu of sustainably sourced seafood, local produce, and artisanal cocktails. When you’re hungover AF, doesn’t “the best fried chicken” with spicy honey and skinny french fries sound like an instant remedy? Wash that down with Cyril’s famous BBC (Bailey’s Banana Colada) or a Sabrosa (Ilegal Mezcal, watermelon, lime, and cayenne dust) and get back in the saddle—you’ve got moves to make.

Bridgehampton Inn & Restaurant: The legendary Bridgehampton Restaurant is set in a quaint inn dating back to 1795, so you should expect Old Euro charm (think country-style furnishings and multiple fireplaces), along with dinner goals courtesy of new chef Brian Szostak. Begin with drinks at Kyle’s Bar, then head to your table for a spread worthy of a GNO. And if you’re a bach party on a budget, you’re in luck. They have a reasonable prix fixe menu starring some of their greatest hits, although the à la carte items are where it’s at. Crawfish and corn fritters with mango aioli, spiced goat cheese dip with warm chips, and grilled shrimp and scallops with succotash are not to be missed. P.S. group pics in front of the iconic orange door are a given.

Blu Mar: Issa vibe on the patio at this hot spot for brunch and dinner. Surrounded by pop art and those famous Hamptons hydrangeas, you’ll have no trouble settling into the Mediterranean mentality, while pregaming your nuptials over plates of grilled octopus, fluke crudo, smoked salmon rillettes, and wild loup de mer. The club AM Southampton also happens to be right next door, so you won’t have to travel far to keep the night going.

Nick & Toni’s: Many restaurants come and go out East, but Nick & Toni’s has remained one of the hardest tables to get, since 1988. That’s probably because you’re vying for seating alongside celebs like SJP, Gwyneth Paltrow, Brad Pitt, and Rolling Stones God, Mick Jagger. Aside from the VIP vibes, you do it for the ‘gram—and the pasta. Florentine specialty penne alla vecchia bettola, gnocchi with lobster and Calabrian chili, and orecchiette in a broccoli rabe pesto made from garden-fresh veggies grown out back will make your stomach happy—and your seams a little tight, so see below for the workouts you can squeeze in the next day.

Where to Practice Self-Care

Because God knows you’re going to need some throughout this weekend.

Paddle Diva: The Hamptons may be a biking community, but when you’re hungover, falling off a paddleboard into the water is a lot less scary than cracking your head on the cement—or worse, bruising a knee before you bust out that mini skirt later. Paddle Diva has super friendly pros and the paddles can be as advanced or beginner as you want them to be. Plus, it’s a killer workout. Some instructors even bring their dogs out on the water and for that, we’re forever grateful. They’re also nice to bachelorette parties, so we love them. See evidence of that in their package deets.

Gurney’s: Both the Montauk and Star Island locations offer exclusive wellness and lifestyle programming all summer long, including classes from these top studios from around the country: Rumble, FlyBarreCorepowerYoga, OBE Fitness, Y7, Dogpound, the ness, Shadowbox, 305 Fitness and more. Best of luck surviving half of those, however.

Concierge Movement: There’s nothing like a lazy girl workout to sweat out last night’s booze and detox to retox. Enter Concierge Movement, the pilates-meets-yoga studio that literally comes to your door (hotel, glamping grounds, Airbnb, you name it). You can even show up in your jammies if you so desire, and for those of you who are really on the struggle bus, they offer minimal-movement-required stretch sessions. ?

Where To Party

The Surf Lodge: We already waxed poetic about them before, but see the below photo for a visual reference. Show up, black jam out, take all the photos, and do it all over again the next day. Other bars that are must-visits in the Montauk area would be: The Gig Shack, Navy Beach, The Sloppy TunaThe Crow’s NestDuryea’s, and Ruschmeyer’s.

Southhampton Social Club: Bringing it full circle—as in all the way back to that Summer House intro—the cast goes here. A lot. As the swankiest fine dining supper club in Southampton, it solves that whole issue of getting around because you can do drinks, dinner, dancing, and more drinks here. There’s also a classic beer garden out back and a $39 three-course prix fixe dinner on Wednesdays, Thursdays, and Sundays. You’ll most likely bump into celebs, socialites, reality stars, and wannabe influencers in the bathroom, so make sure your phone is charged for pics.

The Stephen Talkhouse: You can’t really do the Hamptons justice without paying your respects to Amagansett anchor, Talkhouse. It just wouldn’t be right. Probably the most well-known spot for live music on the island (and for having beyond famous bands take the stage at random like Coldplay), it’s basically a right of passage for Out East newbies.

Your House: Yes, you read that correctly, party all day or night from your over-the-top rental house with DJ Chef, a nationally recognized culinary entertainer who takes the fun of cooking to a whole new level. He is the only entertainer who simultaneously cooks & DJs for events worldwide, giving you an excuse to trade in crowded bars for an at-home party. Whether you’re looking for entertainment during a pool party, a pregame, or as the main event of the night, he’s got you covered.

Boardy Barn: This is like a backyard version of Coyote Ugly in Hampton Bays, only under a beer-soaked tent. If you’re trying to #SundayFunday like you’re still in college, go here, but also be prepared for long lines, personal space invaders, and to leave without your dignity—or panties?

Hampton Bays/Southampton Itinerary:

Pro Tip: To really take advantage of a Hamptons bender weekend, get your travel out of the way. Thursday night is a good time to make the trip—if your lodging is set up for that night. Otherwise, get on the earliest Jitney (book your tickets ahead of time) or train Friday am.

Day 1:

  1. Drop your bags and head to brunch at Silver Lining Diner, as it will be too early to fully check in. Chug a few mimosas or bloodies, grab your suit, then hit the beach.
  2. Obviously you packed a cooler for #roséallday, so plow through that and when empty, head to lunch at Cowfish or Rumba for fish tacos and Caribbean vibes.
  3. Test your drunken paddle skills on the water, or go shopping in downtown Southampton. Purchases made with a buzz are always the smart ones.
  4. Head back to home base to shower, change, pregame, take more shots, etc.
  5. Make your way to dinner at Tutto il Giorno—say hi to Donna for us.
  6. Hit the Beach Bar in Hampton Bays armed with your bach checklist in hand. Dance until your feet hurt, then try to find your way home at 4am.

Day 2:

  1. Head to party brunch at 75 Main. This all day/all night spot holds center court in Southampton and is always prime turf for tipsy shenanigans with the girls.
  2. Beach it up in the afternoon or go wine tasting. The top spots for vino-centric behavior would be Duck Walk and Channing Daughters.
  3. By all means, squeeze in a nap so you make it out later.
  4. Pregame at your house with DJ Chef
  5. Do dinner at Edgewater, The Club at Hallock House, Union Cantina, or Blu Mar.
  6. End the night at Southampton Social Club or AM Southampton.

Day 3:

  1. Sunday Funday at Boardy Barn.
  2. Go home to pass out, then get your ass home.

Montauk Itinerary:

Pro Tip: Slow and steady wins the race Out East, so schedule plenty of nap time in between day drinking your face off during beach marathons, or you’ll never make it out at night.

Day 1:

  1. Roll deep into the hotel, claim your bed, slam a few rounds at the hotel bar, make your way to the beach.
  2. Lunch at Morty’s, Clam Bar, or Duryea’s, settle in at Hero Beach Club or Gurney’s Beach Club for the afternoon shift.
  3. Go home and try to avoid crawling into bed all sandy, but napping is priority.
  4. Head to Highway Restaurant & Bar, Scarpetta Beach, or Showfish for dinner.
  5. Check out Talkhouse or Surf Lodge for live music and more drinking after.

Day 2:

  1. Brunch at Arbor’s then beach, or beach first, then lunch at Navy Beach.
  2. Do one sightseeing thing (it won’t kill you) and swing by Montauk Lighthouse for a group pic in front of this historic landmark.
  3. Plan a summer camp for quasi adults night at Ruschmeyers, where you can have dinner, then play games in the grass.
  4. Go hard your last night at Surf Lodge, The Sloppy Tuna, Liar’s Saloon, or Memory Motel.

Day 3:

  1. Sunday Funday wherever the bride desires then call it a wrap on the bach-tivities.
  2. ✌️ Montauk!

Images: thesurflodge (3), quogueclub (2), gurneysresorts (2), silverliningdiner, highwayhamptons, bridgehamptoninnandrestaurant, blumarhamptons, nickandtonis, paddlediva, concierge_movement, talkhousehamptons, boardybarn / Instagram

Kelli Acciardo
Kelli Acciardo
Kelli Acciardo is a travel, beauty, and lifestyle writer whose obsessions include: spicy margaritas, 20 different shades of metallic bronze eye shadow, and a great bathrobe. Her work has been featured in Travel + Leisure, PureWow, Brit + Co, Bustle, Marie Claire, Refinery29, InStyle, Brides, Women's Health, and Teen Vogue.