Image Credit: Betches

All The Shit You Need If You're Someone Who Is Always On The Internet

If you’re the type of person who will randomly inject phrases like “What if you just… called Taylor up?” and “Soup girls are the coolest girls in the chicken coop,” or if you find yourself humming along to “Renegade,” in 2024, we understand your version of heaven on earth. It’s a world where your TikTok auto-scrolls for you, where everyone gets your YouTube references from 2007, and Vine is regarded as highly as it should be. The elevator music in heaven is exclusively Glee covers. There’s a giant, white Restoration Hardware Cloud couch that can never get stained, Aperol Spritzes are on tap, candy salads are a full meal, and hundreds of Corgis just want to cuddle.

Our goal is to help make your constant consumption of everything internet-related as perfect as possible because it’s not considered doom scrolling if you’re under a weighted blanket! Here’s everything you need if you’re someone who’s always on the goddamn internet. And make sure to follow Betches’ IG account, @alwayson, to find your people. 

Betches may receive a portion of revenue if you click a link and purchase a product or service. The links are independently placed and do not influence editorial content. Prices are accurate at the time of publication.

TikTok Remote

TikTok Remote Control


Beats Studio Pro Bluetooth Wireless Headphones

Memory Foam Back Pillow

Cushion Lab Extra Dense Lumbar Pillow

Blue Light Glasses

Diff Eyewear Bella Bluelight Glasses

Phone Stand

Lamicall Phone Holder Bed Gooseneck Mount

Alix Earle Light

Newmowa 60 LED High Power Rechargeable Clip Light

Criss Cross Applesauce Desk Chair

PUKAMI Criss Cross Chair

Neck Pillow

napfun Neck Pillow

Stanley Cup Snack Bowl

Stanley Cup Snack Bowl

Weighted Blanket

Cooling Breathable Weighted Blanket

Lightening Charger

Fast Charging Lightning Cable


Sensyne 10'' Ring Light with 50'' Extendable Tripod Stand

Steph Perlman
Steph Perlman
Steph Perlman is Betches' Entertainment Editor. She's a Kardashian historian, Real Housewives enthusiast, and Pete Davidson apologist.