Kourtney Kardashian Is Starting A Beauty Line With A Terrible Name

Keeping Up with the Kardashians is not only the name of a reality TV show, but it’s also a hobby that’s growing to be a bigger pain in the ass by the day. The enigmatic pregnancies have taken a toll on my mental health already—like, Kris, IS KYLIE PREGNANT, YES OR NO?! At this rate, we’ll never fucking know until Kylie instagrams her newborn in a pile of lip kits or something. Meanwhile, in this midst of this insanity, it turns out yet *another* Kardashian is looking to make millions off of us beauty products. Yes, you should start prepping your bank account now.

The newest addition to the cosmetics industry looks like it could very well be the one and only health freak queen, Kourtney. According to TMZ, they’ve “learned” Kourtney has filed some legal docs to trademark the name, “Kourt.” V Inspiring, just like her constant use of one-word answers. Apparently, she filed these under her company’s name, “2DIE4KOURT,” which sounds like it could’ve been her first screen name, but either way, it sounds like a straight-up ~mood~ for an upcoming beauty mogul.

Kourtney Kardashian

The documents are reportedly filed under the “Goods and Services” category, but the exact products are still unknown. Shocking. It doesn’t help that Kourt (yes, we’re on a nickname basis) posted this v mysterious picture on her Insta story, featuring different logos next to a Kylie Cosmetics pen and pad:

So, is she making her own makeup? Maybe a skincare line? Collaborating with King Kylie on some lip kits? Kendall, Khloé, do you have anything you’d like to share with the group? Who fucking knows.

What we *do* know is, it’ll probably be like, some healthy, natural, gluten-free shit to justify buying something that will cost like, 10 times what Colourpop sells it for. I’ll most likely be first in line on the day of this launch, so rest assured I’ll keep you guys posted.