It’s Taco Tuesday—I mean, Valentine’s Day—and while your only valentines are your mom and Team Snapchat, there are a bunch of happy people around you who can’t stop reminding you that they’re in fulfilling relationships. Barf. So what’s a single betch to do on Valentine’s Day? Do you organize Galentine’s Day for you and your besties? How about buy yourself 16 pints of Ben & Jerry’s and cry yourself to sleep? Take a fire Snapchat selfie and caption it “Happy Singles Awareness Day”? NO. Do none of those things, floser.
Remember that Valentine’s Day is just another fucking day of the year, and tomorrow you won’t have to worry about it for 364 more days, so don’t do anything embarrassing that’s going to cause you to do damage control tomorrow. Being single on Valentine’s Day isn’t embarrassing; drunk texting your ex and having to apologize the next day certainly is. So we’ve compiled a handy video on how to celebrate Valentine’s Day when you’re single without losing your dignity. You’re so lucky to have us.
For more love advice buy our book, I Had A Nice Time And Other Lies: How To Find Love And Sh*t Like That.