Ah, autumn. Drink in that crisp air and try not to choke on all the smog that follows. Cliché as it is, fall is truly That Girl when it comes to seasons. It feels like we’ve gotten permission to really give into that impulse to “cozy-fy” our life in the most basic of ways. And now that we’re Grown Ass Women, instead of crying with our dad at the kitchen table over times tables we can spend our hard earned moolah on pumpkin-spiced drinks, seasonally related activities, and collecting an absurd amount of throw pillows. I’m giving you permission to let your festive freak fly and you can get started with these very appropriate activities. Happy Fall!
- Buy a new notebook to write all your goals in that you will immediately forget about after October 4th.
- Wander around HomeGoods and shop for fall scented candles until you become overstimulated by the sounds and smells and have to leave.
- Stop by Michael’s for some craft supplies which will live in your hall closet until November 2025.
- Go apple picking and get eaten alive by mutant “Ankle Biter” mosquitoes.
- Stay in to watch Practical Magic and immediately fall asleep six minutes in.
- Head to Target for fall-centric decor and decide Joanna Gaines is charging way too much money for a candlestick you can DIY. (You of course, do not DIY said candlestick.)
- Forget to take a Lactaid pre Pumpkin Cream Cold Brew and shit your pants in Nordstrom Rack.
- Invite your neighbor over to make Apple Cider Spiked Margaritas. Realize neighbor is the same person in the building singing the Hamilton soundtrack at 2 am.
- Break out all your sweaters from the compression containers underneath your bed. Find out quickly that it’s too fucking hot for a cable knit poly-blend and have to repack entire compression container.
- Roast a chicken a la Ina. Get too stoned watching Gilmore Girls and nearly burn house down.
