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Brooke Schofield Deserves Compensation For Surviving The Most Toxic Men Of Our Time

I fear Brooke Schofield has a talent for finding the most major red flag men in the entertainment business. In her defense, it’s not like male reality stars, influencers, comedians, or musicians are known for being stand-up guys and perfect boyfriends. That being said, she has some exes that are truly in their own category of unhinged and evil. I mean, this woman has dealt with pathological lying, gaslighting, getting cheated on, and being called insane nicknames. I think her Cancelled cohost, Tana Mongeau, might need to start vetting everyone she dates.

It’s so frustrating, ’cause Brooke is a hilarious and gorgeous queen, and she deserves someone who will worship the ground she walks on. Sigh. If you’re in the mood to be traumatized, here’s Brooke Schofield’s full dating history and current relationship status.

Brooke Schofield’s Dating History

Harry Jowsey

Harry Jowsey, the villain in 15 dating shows and the world’s leading gaslighter, almost looks like a saint compared to these other boys. Devastatingly, Brooke used to hook up with him. She’s embarrassed by that fact and wanted to keep it private, but of course, Harry “aired [her] the fuck out” on a podcast. During a game of “Fuck Marry Kill,” Harry opted to fuck Brooke “again.” Classy king.

“Let it be known that that was years ago, okay?” Brooke clarified during a 2023 podcast appearance. “That was a different time. And he made me watch the Bee movie every single time. And not one time did he call me by my name.” Oh dear. She giggled and revealed that “Milk” was a part of his nickname for her because her “tits were huge at the time.” And yes, it does somehow get worse… he was saved on her phone as “Harry Jowsey Milk Man.” I-

Clinton Kane

We’re all quite familiar with this chilling tale after obsessing over Brooke’s 14-part TikTok series on Clinton. According to her (because, shockingly, she’s the one I trust in this situation), they dated for about six months during the summer and fall of 2022. But who was Brooke really dating? We’ll never truly know, considering this man lied about his whole family dying, his “Australian” heritage, his childhood, his age, and a whole lot more. Not to mention, he emotionally abused her, cut her off from her friends, and constantly initiated blowout arguments.

Brooke maintains that she was “unmedicated” at the time.

Matt Rife

After enduring Harry and Clinton, you would hope Brooke found herself a decent, kind, normal man. But alas, she stumbled upon none other than Matt Rife, the comedian who got cancelled for telling misogynistic jokes on his (wildly undeserved) Netflix special. “I wouldn’t say he was, like, my ex or anything ’cause it wasn’t like this serious relationship,” Brooke said on Cancelled. ” But like it was more… I wasn’t just hooking up with him. I really liked him.”

He apparently acted like they were in a relationship, but wouldn’t make things official because he was just so “busy.” Brooke admitted, “To anyone with common sense, it’s love bombing. But I had at that point lost all my marbles, so I was obsessed with this guy.” Brooke eventually got added to a group chat of lots of women who were seeing Matt at the same time. “You never wanna be in a group chat with beautiful strange women,” she said. “For a man who doesn’t have time, this man had the most time.”

Beau Mirchoff

Although Brooke hasn’t confirmed this fling or relationship, there are rumors that she’s casually dating Beau Mirchoff, as in the Beau Mirchoff of MTV’s iconic show, Awkward. The influencer and the actor were spotted together backstage at one of her Cancelled live shows.

If this is true, I’m thrilled for her — Beau has to be as step up from Harry, Clinton, and Matt at the very least.

Ilana Frost
Ilana Frost is an entertainment writer at Betches. As a teenage girl in her twenties, she spends her time stanning Olivia Rodrigo, baking cakes for award shows, and refusing to ever leave her Reputation era.