You’ve probably spent the last week complaining about the new Snapchat update, but you’re definitely not the only one. On Wednesday, Kylie Jenner tweeted that she doesn’t even use Snapchat anymore, and the whole world noticed, apparently. On Thursday, Snapchat’s stock lost over $1.3 billion, and experts are blaming Kylie. Call it a crime scene, because Kylie Jenner killed Snapchat. So yeah, if you’re one of those people who still claims that Kylie Jenner and the rest of the Kardashians don’t actually matter, the stock market would beg to fucking differ.
Kylie tweeted that the new Snapchat update “is so sad,” and also called Snapchat her first love, which I’d make fun of, but honestly, same. I’m not like, trying to have a baby anytime soon, but I’m definitely more committed to my Snapchat streaks than I am to 85% of my interpersonal relationships. My therapist definitely isn’t making enough for putting up with my shit.
If Kylie is really serious about giving up the Snapchat life, it’s going to be a big adjustment for her. She was less active while in her pregnancy lockdown hideaway, but she’s always used her story as a major branding tool. I’ve wasted literal hours of my life watching her do lip kit swatches on her forearm, and it just sucks to think that this might be the end.
sooo does anyone else not open Snapchat anymore? Or is it just me… ugh this is so sad.
— Kylie Jenner (@KylieJenner) February 21, 2018
Kylie was also an avid user of Snapchat filters, particularly the puppy and the deer. Her go-to was basically just staring into the camera while playing the music of whatever rapper she was dating at the time, which is the exact content I most identify with. Snapchat has given the world many important thirst trap moments, but all good things must come to an end.
So now that Kylie Jenner killed Snapchat , you can probably find her hawking her makeup on Insta stories. Oh wait, I forgot we still have Insta stories. Forget all that shit I said before, we’re totally going to be fine. Plus, I’ve already spent too much time and energy worrying about Kylie Jenner this month. Call me if Khloé has her baby, but other than that I’m taking a fucking nap.
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