Fired Up For Aries Season: Weekly Horoscopes March 22-26

Happy astrological new year! This is our first full week in Aries season, meaning we are all embracing Aries’ fun, flirty energy. Spring has sprung, people are being vaccinated, and we’re all ready to take on the post-COVID world. Except we’re not actually post-COVID yet, so please Aries season responsibly. I’m pretty sure the virus doesn’t even know what astrology is. Rude.


Welcome to your seaso—aaaand you’re already out the door. The sun is out, your fire energy is up, and you are blazing new trails every time you step out the door. Not that it’s a competition, but you can’t help but feel like your season is the best. Also, in Aries season, everything is a competition. Keep up.


This year’s Aries season is taking place in your house of introspection, giving you some much needed confidence in your inner voice. This month, instead of second-guessing every single thing you do, listen to your intuition and see where it takes you. Also, no need to be so rude to yourself all the time. You’re kind of amazing.


Leaving your baggage behind and running naked into the woods (metaphorically)? Yes, please! With Aries’ fire under you, now is the time for new growth and forward movement. And we can’t really do that if we’re stuck texting “wyd” to the same three f*ckboys over and over again, now can we? Just saying…


Buckle up, buttercup, because this month Aries season is taking you full-throttle. Now is the perfect time to dive into professional projects, as you’ll have the energy and drive to see it through to the end. Not to mention it’s finally warm enough to chug iced cold brew again. That’ll probably be a huge factor.


When the fire of Aries combines with the fire of Leo, you might end up feeling like you’re about to explode. Don’t be surprised if you find yourself feeling a little restless this week, especially on days when the weather says “day drinking” but the CDC says no. Don’t worry, Leo, the world will open up soon enough and you’ll be able to show off all the outfits no one has seen yet because quarantine.


Hot-headed Aries might inflame some latent emotions for you this week, Virgo, so get ready to ride the emotional roller coaster. Don’t be surprised if you find yourself feeling more sensitive or emotional as we enter the Aries phase of your chart. Translation: definitely hide your phone before any and all alcohol consumption.


I mean… does anyone love spring more than you? Pretty sure that’s a no. Aries’ heat is giving you spring fever, so don’t be surprised if you start nursing a new crush. Or fifty. Love is in the air, and you can’t stop breathing it all in. Through your double medical-grade masks, of course.


The time to stop procrastinating… is now. Not five minutes from now. Not even five seconds from now. Now. Aries season is giving you the boost you need to clean your closet/do your taxes/organize your junk drawer/whatever other thing you’ve been avoiding since we all thought quarantine would be a two-week thing. It’s time.


Aries season has your romantic life sizzling, so hopefully you haven’t ditched your winter boo to get ready for Vaccine Summer just yet. Light a candle, slip into something more comfortable, and let your downstairs neighbor know you’re going to be building some furniture late Friday night, so they won’t be alarmed if they hear some banging…


Spring cleaning? We don’t need to tell you twice. Aries season has you ready to take Windex to every surface and get to work, so why stop yourself? Set aside some time this week to go absolutely nuts with a Swiffer on your apartment. And as an added bonus, your housemates will definitely owe you one.


Slowing down during Aries season? Well, you do always like to do the opposite of everyone else. While the other signs are putting their foot on the gas, Aries season is actually a great time for you to pull back and focus on the things that are most important to you. First order of business: figuring out what those things even are.


Your season is over (boo) and it’s time for new beginnings. Who are you in this new phase of your life? What is your life’s purpose? What aspects of your life from last year are you ready to leave behind? And don’t say COVID. That’s kind of a given.

Images: Mark Decile / Unsplash; Giphy (12)

Alise Morales
Alise Morales
Alise Morales is a comedy writer and performer. She is the writer of the Betches Sup Newsletter and co-host of the Betches Sup Podcast.