Happy National Princess Day!!! Yes, this is a real thing, as I discovered while procrastinating on social media this morning. But instead of talking about those tired bitches from the Disney films (no offense), I want to focus our attention on real princesses of history. Namely, the ones who really fucked things up for everyone around them!!
As a total pillow princess, I relate so much to these girlies and think that we really have a lot in common. They’re a princess; I’m a writer, and we both have jobs that are kind of outdated and don’t really contribute to the world. But we both look so slay doing it. So, let’s sip tea and celebrate princess day with the biggest princess scandals in recent history.
The Princess and the Affair
Let’s not dally and dive right into a beloved British princess. Oh wait, did you think I was going to talk about Diana immediately? Oh darling, not a chance. I’ve got to warm you up before we reach the fashionista who immortalized bike shorts.
So Princess Margaret was the younger sister of Queen Elizabeth, but this happened right before Lizzie took to the throne. In the 1950s, Margaret was a stunning socialite, famed for her glamorous lifestyle and reputed romances — we could be twins, honestly. Most famous was her romance with Group Captain Peter Townsend, a married RAF officer in the royal household. Ruh roh.
Her father, the king, passed away, and so her big sister Lizzie became Queen. Peter divorced his wife and proposed to Margaret. She was head over heels for him, so of course she’d say yes… right? Well, the government thought he would make an unsuitable husband for the Queen’s 22-year-old sister, and the Archbishop of Canterbury refused the match. Margaret didn’t get the blessing she needed, and instead, she broke things off. In 1960, she married a single man who was gifted the title of the Earl of Snowdon (big sister’s way of showing she approved of this one!). But their divorce in 1978 garnered a lot of criticism again, as this wasn’t very cool back then.
The Princess and the Doctor
We’re going slightly further back in time now, to the late 18th century. This royal tale concerns Caroline Matilda, Princess of Great Britain and Queen of Denmark and Norway. She married her first cousin, King Christian VII of Denmark and Norway when she was just fifteen. He supposedly suffered from a mental illness and was cold to his wife throughout the marriage.
The German physician Johann Friedrich Struensee entered the king’s service in 1769 and soon began a love affair with the lonely Queen. To the extent that many wondered if her second child, Louise Augusta, was actually fathered by the doctor. Eventually, Struensee’s power in court made him enemies, and he was executed. Caroline was divorced and banished, thus making her a mere princess again. Oh, did I mention she was only twenty-one by this point? And she died three years later of scarlet fever — it’s giving Beth in Little Women.
The Princess and the Escape to Europe
A bit of a sadder one, but bear with me, as it ends well!
Princess Soraya was the second wife of the Shah of Iran. In 1958, the Shah of Iran divorced the 25-year-old because she could not give him a child. She was given the option to agree to him taking an additional wife who could produce a male heir (he had a daughter from his first wife), but she chose to “sacrifice her own happiness” and separate from him.
The divorce was public and scandalous, and Soraya was heartbroken. But she went off to Europe and led a glamorous life far from the stifling nature of court. She has a brief career as an actress and even a liaison with an Italian film director. Ugh, I want the kind of romance that gets described as a liaison. She lived in the magical city of Paris until her death in 2001.
The Princess and the American
Let’s head east to the gorgeous country of Thailand. Back in 1972, Princess Ubol Ratana Rajakanya of Thailand gave up her royal titles to marry an American commoner, Peter Ladd Jensen. I love how, in these stories, non-royals are referred to as commoners. It sounds so degrading. That’s going to be my new insult.
The pair met at university, as this Woman in STEM studied at Massachusetts Institute of Technology, graduating with a Bachelor of Science in mathematics. The palace finds out about her new lover, and her parents strongly oppose their relationship. She refused to end it, and the pair got married instead. As a result, she was stripped of her titles. Peter and Ubol Ratana had several kiddos and lived in the US, where she even took the name ‘Mrs. Julie Jensen’ for anonymity.
They divorced after twenty-six years, and then she returned home to Thailand. Despite her lack of royal titles, she was involved in various charities and foundations, including LGBTQ rights and anti-drug work. She then tried to run for Prime Minister, and her brother, the king, was like hell nah!!! Sad.
The Princess Who Chose True Love
It seems to be quite the recurring theme that princesses choose love over royalty. It couldn’t be me, as I happen to look excellent in a tiara — no, really, I do. This time, the selfless lover is Princess Mako of Japan, and it’s the most recent entry on our list!
Princess Mako gave up her royal title to marry a commoner, Kei Komuro. The marriage was delayed and criticized due to financial controversies surrounding Komuro’s family, leading to intense media scrutiny. They finally married in October 2021, and she officially gave up her title. Mako and her husband eventually moved to New York to escape the pressure and drama. Things had gotten so stressful that Mako had been diagnosed with complex post-traumatic stress disorder as a result. Last we heard, she was working as an unpaid volunteer at the Metropolitan Museum of Art, assisting curators within the museum’s Asian art collection. She’s a total art girlie and I love that for her.
The Princess and the Drug Lord
Forget The Princess and the Frog, this is the Disney adaptation I want to watch! As a secret Dutchie, I felt the need to ensure my people were represented in this list of royal scandals. I can’t have the world thinking we’re boring. Considering how direct and rude my people can be, I knew it wouldn’t take long to find a scandal worth mentioning.
Princess Mabel was royalty by marriage, as she married Prince Friso, the son of our beloved Queen Beatrix. For context, her other son, Prince Willem-Alexander, is currently ruling our tiny country.
Before her marriage to Prince Friso, it was revealed that Princess Mabel had a previous relationship with Dutch drug lord Klaas Bruinsma, who was killed in 1991. The drama!!! From dating a drug lord to marrying a prince, how has HBO not snapped this up? While Mabel initially downplayed the extent of the relationship, it was later revealed that she had not been fully honest about her past. This led to a significant scandal in 2003, and as a result, the Dutch government refused to seek parliamentary approval for the marriage, meaning Prince Friso lost his place in the line of succession to the throne when they married. Finally, a man giving up something for love, it’s about time.
The Princess and a Former Member Of The Hitler Youth
Once again, we’re in the Netherlands (the country that has Amsterdam, in case you’re lost). This time, it’s for Princess Beatrix, the mama mentioned in our previous royal tale. I guess she couldn’t give her son too much grief, considering her own marriage drama.
Back in 1966, when everyone was rocking kick-ass eyeliner and quiffs, Princess Beatrix’s marriage to Claus von Amsberg, a German diplomat, caused quite a stir. Claus was a former member of the Hitler Youth, as was required by law at the time, and drafted into the German military during World War II at 18. Like most of Europe, the Netherlands has some painful memories of the war, especially given the German occupation of the country. In particular, Rotterdam was bombed heavily.
Many Dutch citizens protested the wedding, and there were even riots in Amsterdam. The wedding went ahead, and Queen Beatrix even went on to rule without issue, becoming one of the most beloved queens.
The Princess and *Those* Interviews
Last but certainly not least, we can finally turn our attention to the reason you’re here: Princess Diana of Wales. Our gorgeous girlie’s marriage to Prince Charles (now king, I guess) was a tumultuous one, marked by infidelity. Most notable was Charles’ ongoing relationship with Camilla Parker Bowles, who is now his Queen. A particularly scandalous moment was when a phone call between the two lovers was released, where Charles affectionately said he wished he could be Camilla’s tampon to be inside her. Sorry.
But Charles and Diana’s divorce wasn’t even the biggest drama of her life. It was her candid interviews, notably with the BBC in 1995, where she admitted to her own affairs and discussed her struggles with royal life, that really shocked the world. Diana was truly loved by the people, and as a fellow sufferer, I’ve always held so much respect for how she opened the conversation around bulimia. She also did a great deal of charity work across the globe and touched so many lives.
Unfortunately, Diana passed away in 1997 in a car accident in Paris. I guess the final princess controversy is that many speculate that foul play was involved… ALLEGEDLY! DON’T SUE ME, I KNOW NOTHING I SWEAR, YOUR HIGHNESS-
