In a move nobody saw coming except all of us, Ben Higgins and Lauren Bushnell have broken up. It’s time to hit up the group chat and collect your wagers, Bachelor Nation. The couple got engaged on March 14, 2016 and has broken up a year and two months later—almost to the day—on May 15, 2017 (a day that will live on in infamy). It’s such an oddly specific date to break up, it’s almost like Ben and Lauren were waiting for something? Like, the stipulations put forth on a signed piece of paper to expire, perhaps? Hmmm…
The couple announced their split to People this afternoon, saying, “It is with heavy hearts that we announce our decision to go our separate ways,” adding, “We feel fortunate for the time we had together, and will remain friends with much love and respect for one another. We wish nothing but the best for each other, and ask for your support and understanding at this time.”
Translation: We’re just glad we can stop pretending to keep up this charade of a relationship. You will never know the real reason we broke up, so please don’t @ us.
However, I don’t think it’s too hard to jump to conclusions
make an educated guess about their breakup. If we learned anything from Ben And Lauren: Happily Ever After? it’s that Lauren was pushing way too hard for that MRS (I’m a pusher, Ben. I’m a pusher). Meanwhile, Ben was growing more and more uncomfortable at the thought of marriage by the day—an odd choice considering he willingly entered a reality show where the ultimate goal is to get engaged. Also if Ben and Lauren’s spin-off was accurate to real life, they spent more time hanging out with Grant, Lace, and the twins than they actually spent together. When you’re voluntarily spending most of your time with two people who think being a twin is a full-time job and cannot boil water on their own, that kind of says a lot about your relationship.
I’d also take a step further and add that Lauren was definitely still not over Ben telling Jojo he loved her on the Fantasy Suites date. I say this because she told People in October, “For a long time, I was really angry for being blindsided. And that resentment and anger affected our relationship much longer than it should have.” Like, girl, get over it. You went on a show where the whole premise is that you’re dating a guy who’s also dating 29 other women. Earth to Matilda! I can imagine every fight Ben and Lauren had ending like:
Lauren: Well at least I didn’t tell some other guy I loved him the night before proposing to you!
Ben: Oh my god, that was one time!
Now that a second season of a shitty reality show spin-off that nobody watched is no longer in the cards for them, it’s tough to say what’s next for Ben and Lauren. Ben could resume his failed political career. Lauren will probably launch an online wedding magazine so she can vicariously live out her dreams of being a bride. But who really knows. I never thought I’d say this, but are Jojo and Jordan the best/most legit Bachelor couple left? Man, 2017 is weird.