As I’m sure you’re aware by now, there’s a new Taylor Swift album! Announced just 16 hours before its release, folklore comes less than a year after Taylor’s last album, and it’s a major departure from her recent music. She wrote and recorded the album entirely in quarantine, which officially makes me feel like the least productive person on the planet. Oh well.
The album is actually pretty great, and it’s the perfect soundtrack to what is definitely the saddest summer in recent memory. Taylor Swift stans are already picking apart the hidden meanings in every little lyric, but I don’t have the attention span (or the desire) to do that, so instead, I picked out the lyrics that will make the best Instagram captions for all your summer 2020 posts.
I’m Doing Good, I’m On Some New Sh*t
Song: “the 1”
This is the very first line of the album (the song is “the 1”), and right away, Taylor lets us know she’s not f*cking around. Idk exactly what being “on some new sh*t” means for Taylor, but it’s an instant classic caption. This works for any photo where you want to convey that you’re a queen, like a beach pic or a rooftop shot. This summer might be lame, but you can still remind everyone how hot you are and rake in the likes on Instagram.
“I’m doing good I’m on some new shit” – me, on the same exact shit I was on before
— Betches (@betchesluvthis) July 24, 2020
You Know The Greatest Films Of All Time Were Never Made
Song: “the 1”
Wow, a second banger of a caption, and we’re still on the first verse of “the 1”. This lyric stuck out to be because it’s basically the 2o20 version of “you are a cinema, I could watch you forever.” If you didn’t have a Facebook album with that as the title, you’re too young to be reading this. This is definitely a caption for an annoyingly cute photo of you and your S.O., which I will begrudgingly double tap.
When You Are Young They Assume You Know Nothing
Song: “cardigan”
I’m still deciding how I feel about “cardigan,” but this lyric is perfect for any photo that makes you look smart. Reading a book, posing with a book, just wearing glasses, you get the idea. I wouldn’t personally use this caption, but I went to college with about 500 people who definitely would.
There Goes The Maddest Woman This Town Has Ever Seen
Song: “the last great american dynasty”
The title “the last great american dynasty” sounds like a Lana Del Rey knock-off, but I digress. This lyric is a fun general vibe that could basically go with any picture of you. It’s kind of like a modern update of “well-behaved women seldom make history,” meaning it’s only a matter of time before your middle school English teacher has it printed on a bookmark.
I Think I’ve Seen This Film Before, And I Didn’t Like The Ending
Song: “exile”
I mean, talk about a 2020 mood. This year feels like a combination of 2016, 1918 (I imagine), and every sh*tty year in between. This second film-themed option feels appropriate for any post that’s generally about 2020 being awful, which is like, most posts these days. Also, Bon Iver is perfect, so “exile” is automatically one of my favorite songs on the album.
I Want You To Know I’m A Mirrorball
Song: “mirrorball”
The actual song “mirrorball” is pretty depressing, but when it comes to Instagram captions, the mental image of a shiny disco ball is too good to pass up. Sadly, going out photos aren’t really a thing right now, but if you’re doing fun makeup for any reason, or wearing something sparkly, this is a solid option.
August Sipped Away Like A Bottle Of Wine
Song: “august”
August is somehow only a week away (what is time?), so file this one away to use in a month. July went by way too fast, and next month will probably be the same. This will be THE caption for any posts complaining about how another lame month has already come and gone. Summer 2020 is basically just a blur at this point, but at least Taylor found a creative way to say it.
This Is Me Trying
Song: “this is me trying”
Whomst among us cannot relate to this?? Both in quarantimes and like, always, “this is me trying” is basically my response to anyone asking me for anything. Especially in 2020, this is an ideal caption for a photo where you did the bare minimum (but still look hot). Think pajama pics, no makeup selfies, or bragging that you finally washed your hair. You’re doing amazing, sweetie.
when my boss says I need to give 50% more effort pic.twitter.com/WuIpijDyAN
— Betches (@betchesluvthis) July 24, 2020
Gave Me The Blues And Then Purple Pink Skies
Song: “invisible string”
If you’re posting any kind of sunset pic, this is IT. This lyric from “invisible string” strikes the perfect balance between sad girl summer vibes and just sounding vaguely pretty, so it kind of goes with anything. Everyone loves a caption that goes with the color scheme of the photo.
It’s Obvious That Wanting Me Dead Has Really Brought You Two Together
Song: “mad woman”
There’s a rumor that this lyric from “mad woman” is about Kim and Kanye, which like, maybe. But speculation aside, this is the perfect caption if you have an ex who still follows you that you absolutely hate. He knows what he did! Or even if you’re perpetually single and the whole dramatic ex scenario is just in your imagination, it’s still kind of a fun and mysterious caption idea.
when you tell a Karen she can’t get a haircut for three months pic.twitter.com/3pn1KDl5ua
— Betches (@betchesluvthis) July 24, 2020
Happy listening, and happy captioning! This is probably the nicest article I’ve ever written about Taylor Swift, so if you have thoughts on these caption ideas, please feel free to not slide into my DMs. It’s not that deep.
Images: Tinseltown / Shutterstock.com