The Dream Cast Of The Inevitable Scandoval Biopic

Somewhere, Ryan Murphy is hard at work assembling an ensemble cast for this year’s most chilling American Horror Story: The Scandoval biopic. The Bravo-verse affair took over national news at record pace, with coverage from not just TMZ, Just Jared, and New York Post, but literal news outlets including The New York Times, CNN, NBC News, The Wall Street Journal, and The Washington Post. Naturally, the next phase is either an FX 10-part limited series, a big-screen biopic, or (sigh) a Lifetime movie.

While we wait for the official announcement, we’ve taken the liberty to enlist our dream cast for the inevitable project. We encourage the actors below to reach out with availability. 

Jared Leto as Tom Sandoval 

Jared Leto/Tom Sandoval

Florence Pugh as Ariana Madix 


Justine Lupe as Raquel Leviss


Timothée Chalamet as DJ James Kennedy 


Aubrey Plaza as Katie Maloney 


Nick Robinson as Tom Schwartz


Liz Gillies as LaLa Kent 


Megan Fox as Scheana Shay


Olivia Coleman as Lisa Vanderpump 


All photos courtesy of Getty. 


Steph Perlman
Steph Perlman
Steph Perlman is Betches' Entertainment Editor. She's a Kardashian historian, Real Housewives enthusiast, and Pete Davidson apologist.