Between all the breakups (RIP Katy Perry and Orlando Bloom) and Oscar winners accused of sexual assault (hi, Casey Affleck), celeb gossip has been pretty fucking depressing lately. Then the beef between Nicki “Self-Proclaimed Queen of Rap” Minaj and Remy “Who TF Is That?” Ma reared its scandalous head again, and we finally have something worth talking about. Buckle up, because the Minaj-Ma feud goes back an actual, literal decade.
Let’s start with who tf Remy Ma is, because she hasn’t been relevant in mainstream culture since the days of Blackberries and worrying about Britney Spears. Reminisce Mackie, aka Remy Ma, is a rapper and member of the Bronx-based rap crew Terror Squad. I know that all is meaningless to you, so I’ll put it this way. Remember when Fat Joe came out with that song “Lean Back” and it was played at everyone’s bar mitzvah? She was the girl who did the second verse. There ya go.
Anywho, Remy and Nicki’s stars were on the rise around the same time in the early 2000s. Remy had been nominated for a Grammy and won BET’s award for Best Female Hip-Hop Artist in 2005—but her career hit a roadblock when she got sent to fucking prison in 2007 for shooting some chick in the stomach. Basically, don’t piss off Remy Ma.
Nicki is either brave or kinda dumb, though, because she proceeded to do exactly that. In 2007, before Remy got shipped off, Nicki released the freestyle “Dirty Money.” She never confirmed whether or not it was a diss track directed at Remy, but it includes the line “tell that bitch with the crown to run it like Chris Brown” over a Terror Squad beat. We don’t know anything about rap, but even we can figure out who Nicki was talking about.
Remy apparently confronted Nicki at a release party, which isn’t exactly starting down a path to friendship. There were also a bunch of rumors that the two were dating, which probably made things even more awk. But before things escalated further, Remy spent the next six years living out Orange Is the New Black and watching her competition get super famous and probably carving a tally of the days until she could finally fire back into her jail cell wall.
The shade fest started soon after, with Remy Ma releasing a song with Fat Joe and my future husband, Ty Dolla $ign, called “Money Showers” in which she rapped, “Bitch claiming she the queen, what? Not hardly / Who the fuck gave you your crown, bitch? Steve Harvey?”
So here’s where shit pops off: On February 23, 2017, Nicki Minaj showed up on Gucci Mane’s latest track, “Make Love,” with a verse directed at some unnamed lady rapper who definitely, absolutely isn’t Remy Ma. JK! Nicki obviously meant Remy. Two days later, Remy Ma released “shETHER,” an entire fucking song dedicated to taking down Nicki.
— Remy Ma (@RealRemyMa) February 25, 2017
Allow me to break it down for you. Before you even listen to the song, the cover is a dismembered, bloody Barbie. A Barbie, if you’ll remember, has been Nicki’s entire persona since, like, ever. But in case that was too subtle, the track opens with an audio clip of Nicki yelling “Free Remy.” Remy then goes on to make fun of Nicki’s ridiculous fashion choices and repeat the phrase “fuck Nicki Minaj” a bunch to really drive the point home. She even goes in on Nicki’s ass, which is sacred territory for most of America. Basically, Remy is afraid of no betch.
Nicki’s response was to Instagram an article about the low sales of Remy’s last album. Clearly, she recognized this as the weak move it was, because she quickly took the post down. Nicki then Instagrammed a video of Beyoncé singing about how great of a rapper Nicki is—which like, as amazing as Beyoncé is, is still a LAME AS FUCK COMEBACK.
So far it’s been 7 full days since “shETHER” dropped, and STILL no diss track or any real acknowledgment from Nicki.
Anyone who was alive during the infamous Drake/Meek Mill beef of 2015 (so like, all of us) knows that when it comes to rap beefs, time is of the essence. The longer you wait to release your clap back, the lower your chances of winning this beef are. You would think that the person who dated Meek Mill during this very beef would know this better than anyone, so it’s not clear what exactly Nicki’s plan is. At this point it seems like she’s going to play the quiet game and just take this giant L, and honestly, we’re disappointed.
Nicki’s big comeback so far has been favoriting approximately a bajillion negative tweets about Remy from other Twitter users. Celebrities: they’re just as petty as us!