Wearing lingerie without looking like you’re trying too hard is extremely difficult to achieve, mainly because lingerie at its core is one of the most extra inventions in history. Like, somehow, someone created an industry of getting women to pay a shit ton of money for complicated strands of lace that they wear for a couple of minutes before stripping naked. Whoever realized that they could get people to spend hundreds of dollars on tiny see-through dresses and underwear with the crotch cut out is both a psycho and a genius (funny how those two things often go together). Honestly, I’m not even convinced that lingerie turns men on, because most guys will probably tell you that trying to figure out the clasp on a regular bra is too much to handle, let alone trying to figure out how to release all the straps on a garter belt. I think the point of lingerie is probably to make you feel like Candice Swanepoel for a quick sec and make it so you begin the boning process with a heightened level of confidence. The right lingerie can make you feel yourself so hard that you’ll do all sorts of wild shit in bed, like start in reverse cowgirl or actually complete a full blowjob. However, if you mess up and get the wrong lingerie, you’re going to look like you rooted through J Woww’s closet from the first season of Jersey Shore. The more understated, the better, so here are a few suggestions.
1. Victoria’s Secret XO Lace Teddy
If Lauren Conrad offered a lingerie section on her website, I kind of feel like this would be included. It definitely falls into that whole “less is more” category by being sexy without revealing too much more than a trashy bodysuit from Charlotte Russe would show. Plus, it has a racerback, which is basically a magical design that is super comfortable but also makes your boobs look amazing.
2. Calvin Klein Black Lace Bralette
Calvin Klein’s been making the best underwear essentials for like, ever, so obviously they know how to handle lingerie without being a total fucking hardo. This black lace set is basically a hotter version of the bralettes your normally wear because of its romantic lace and mesh details and discretely padded cups. You can save this one for the bedroom if you want, but honestly this piece is so cute there’s no reason you couldn’t also wear it under a sheer top, making it one of the only lingerie pieces that you’ll absolutely wear on the reg.
3. Out From Under Exploded Fishnets
Wearing lingerie as regular clothing is definitely a trend right now because apparently we’re all really extra and needed to make fishnets and slip dresses a thing again. This is pretty much made with the purpose of having some fishnets stick out over your clothes. I’m still really conflicted on this trend, but I’ll prob end up wearing it in like a week anyway.
4. ASOS Hi-Apex Lace Risky Business Bodysuit
Nothing says “I’m not trying too hard” like ordering your lingerie from ASOS instead of having to get off your ass to go buy it in a store. ASOS has its own brand of Risky Business lingerie and it’s all pretty low-key and not going to cost you $100 for two scraps of lace that they’re calling a bra unlike SOME people (*looks at Agent Provocateur*). Plus, this bodysuit has a high-cut leg, which is soo in right now.
5. Victoria’s Secret Very Sexy Pleated Babydoll
This is the perfect casual kind of lingerie to own, because if your sex life starts going downhill you can always repurpose it as a Halloween costume like Karen from Mean Girls. You might be single AF but you’re also a mouse… duh.