In case you somehow missed it, pop superstar Taylor Swift just casually released her re-recorded version of her Red album in the name of being honest. The 30-track album of course has the classic songs from the original 2012 album—but also brought out some never-before-heard tracks, and along with that, never-before-heard lyrics. In doing so, she basically gave her fans a Mad Libs level assignment, matching lyrics to moments in Taylor’s life with one J*ke G*llenhaal. The song that has taken over the majority of everyone’s life? “All Too Well (10 Minute Version) (Taylor’s Version) (From the Vault)”. Yes, it is over 10 minutes long, so it may be one of the longest songs with one of the longest song titles.
While Taylor’s relationship with Jake is at the forefront of most of the dialogue, there is a third party who is taking up an almost larger amount of the cultural conversation. They’ve been talked about on-and-off in the past, but this is the first time they seem to also be taking back their narrative, and more importantly, sharing their side of the story. I was beyond honored to sit down with them for their first interview in this exclusive conversation. Sure, Oprah just chatted with Adele, but ladies and gentlemen—enter Taylor Swift’s scarf.
Betches: First off, thank you so much for taking the time to chat with me—I can only imagine the whirlwind of these last few days.
Taylor’s Scarf: You have no idea. I mean, literally last week I had nothing to do. Not only was “All Too Well (10 Minute Version)” not out then, but also global warming has really hurt my career. It’s November and people are barely wearing scarves—it’s a tough business.
B: Ah, I can only imagine. So this really came at the right time for you. What was your involvement with the re-recordings?
TS: I mean… real fans know that while I haven’t been in contact with Taylor in almost 10 years, we’ve definitely emotionally stayed in touch. And it’s funny, people seem to keep saying that Jake Gyllenhaal inspired this entire album but like, hello… It’s me.
B: 100%. Everyone seems to be talking about you, have people reached out about their own scarf stories?
TS: My favorite thing about music is that it brings everyone together. Like, the people who have been reaching out to me, oh my god. Like, I just got this DM from someone who left an infinity scarf that they really liked on a United flight a few years back and even after calling 15 minutes after they got off the plane, they couldn’t find it? Heartbreaking. But they were happy to know that they weren’t alone, cause even Taylor Swift loses scarves.
B: Missing scarves really is a pandemic in its own way. Now, I have to ask, since you were there—what was Taylor and Jake’s relationship like in the moment?
TS: It’s so funny you ask that. Obviously she was there and remembers it all too well, but for me… I had so much going on in 2012. Like, between Kony 2012 and the final Twilight movie coming out, I was super distracted to say the least. So I can’t really recall how they treated each other, but they definitely were obsessed with me, if that answers your question.
B: That sort of doesn’t answer any question I asked. Anyway, in their infamous paparazzi shot, they seem to be carrying a bag from Union Market. Now, as a fan of that grocery store, can you tell us what they bought?
TS: I’m sorry, is this interview about me or them? I took time out of my day to talk with you and you’re asking me about grocery store orders and Twilight.
B: Well, to be fair… you brought up Twilight.
TS: Wow. Okay. You’re truly just like Jake. And I should know because i’ve been on-and-off with his neck for the past few years. I honestly wish Jake and Taylor the best, but I’d really like to focus on my career, my busy season of winter coming up, and my announcement.
B: Oh! What announcement is that?
TS: I am going to be on the next season of Dancing with the Stars! I am both excited and blessed for this new journey, and I’m ready for America and the world to see what this scarf really is capable of.
B: Well, congratulations on that—I’m excited to watch you. Any last words you want to say to the Swifties or anyone?
TS: I’d much rather take this time to show support to the real fan group in my life, the Scarfies. You guys don’t know how much you mean to me, and I love that we are able to reconnect like this. Okay, I have to hang up now, Jake is going out on a coffee run and has to wear me—he’s wearing me around his face now though, for you know, obvious reasons.
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