Turning 28 means a handful of things — not being the youngest person in the room anymore. The transitional mayhem of your Saturn Return. Accidentally flipping your camera to front-facing and suddenly panicking, “Should I get Botox?!”
That third question has become especially preoccupying for me. I’m the type of person who has spent countless pathetic nights alone in my studio apartment, zooming in 300x on Kaia Gerber’s face, trying to decipher what I would need to do to slope my nose like a bunny hill, or give my cheekbones their own zip code.
Even as an elder Gen Z, I find myself replacing Google with TikTok whenever a question (or hyperfixation) arises. And once the algorithm senses even a whisper of a new interest, suddenly your entire FYP is co-opted by Keto influencers and lawn mowing ASMR. For the young and injectable-curious, turning to the Tok for answers is the new norm — we get inundated with terms like “baby Botox” and “facial balancing” and legitimately wonder if we need to get a “liquid nose job” or a lip flip in hopes of reaching our full aesthetic potential.
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You can’t believe everything you see on the internet (unless you’re a boomer sending your kids AI-generated Instagram Reels of cats playing ice hockey), so lucky for me, I was able to connect with the team at Botox and Juvéderm to get certified and reliable info for us injectable virgins. I was set up with Dr. David Shafer, a double-certified and internationally recognized plastic surgeon, to personally answer my many questions and give me my first treatment. I immediately recognized his name from the popular NYCBitchesWithTaste reddit, where he’s often cited as a trusted choice for liposuction, breast implants, and lip filler. Plus, if you watched season 1 of Love Thy Nader, he’s featured treating the supermodel sisters. Me, a lowly civilian in the same clinic as the next-gen Kardashians?! Christmas came early.
Ready to pop your Botox cherry? Think twice before asking for “baby Botox.”
As someone who will willingly spend $78 on a “holy grail” 6oz contour stick on the off-chance that its properties make me even .03% prettier, I would have started getting Botox when I was 13 if I had the means.
If you’re Botox-curious, you might be tempted by the adorably innocent moniker “baby Botox.” It has the same “I’m just a girl” appeal as “junior publicist” or “alcove studio.” But is it actually worth your money just so that you can relish being a few years further from death than the almond moms sitting next to you in the waiting room?
“The concept of [baby Botox] is a lower dose, with patients thinking this will give a more natural result,” explained Dr. Shafer. “However, this is misguided. Treating just one area or underdosing can throw off the balance of the muscles.”
Plus, the smaller dosage means the effects don’t last as long, which might make you feel disappointed by what you paid for.
Okay, it sounds like Baby Botox is a myth. So is “preventative Botox” even real? Am I even real?
Call off the fake news police! According to Dr. Shafer, while “baby Botox” may not be the best idea, preventative Botox is “definitely real.” While there’s no golden age that he specifically recommends for treatment, you can confidently sit your perky little ass in the chair knowing that today’s investments pay dividends for tomorrow’s glass skin.
“Over time, dynamic lines turn into permanent static lines that are visible even at rest. By treating early with BOTOX® Cosmetic, there is a preventive effect that delays and reduces the formation of the static lines,” Dr. Shafer confirmed.
Father Time waits for no man — if you’re noticing the appearance of temporary lines when you raise your eyebrows in shock at RHOSLC plot twist or furrow them at an unconscionably passive-aggressive Slack message, you’re ready to become a Botox baddie.
How do I help my face reach its hottest potential? And don’t say a salmon sperm facial.
It’s comical to me that some people are so afraid of Botox and filler because they’re worried they are going to look puffy or janky, as if a syringe even grazing their skin is going to turn them into a washed-up Bravolebrity. In reality, your provider will speak with you about your specific goals and build up to the results you want over time.
For increased “facial harmony” (AKA why your fave influencer somehow still looks like a Victoria’s Secret model in her glam-free 5 a.m. pilates routine), injectables like Juvéderm are the secret. I’m all about religious gua sha use, but unfortunately, we’re fooling ourselves if we keep pretending a $7 hunk of jade from Amazon is going to get us the snatched jawline of our dreams.
Now for the million-dollar question: Does Botox hurt?
Image Credit: Getty Images
Due to my relatively low pain tolerance (my laser hair removal appointments feel like they could be a deleted scene from the Saw franchise), I went into my appointment with Dr. Shafer mentally prepared to cry and horrifically embarrass myself on 5th Avenue.
It was definitely a sharp pinch, and my eyes teared up at one point, but it wasn’t unmanageable or enough to make me dread going back.
Were the results everything you dreamed?
One of my old coworkers had told me that Botox “makes your skin go up a tax bracket,” which feels like an apt description. No one outright noticed that I had been in the chair, but a friend commented that my skin looked perfect, and immediately had an “I’ll have what she’s having” moment after I shared that I had upgraded from Trader Joe’s Retinol to the green activator from The Susbtance.
Will you be back for more?
Dr. Shafer recommends that you re-up every quarter, but without a husband’s Amex Platinum to wield, I won’t be nearly that frequent a flyer.
