We give gifts for so many different occasions: birthdays, giving birth, getting married — but how often do you see people celebrating some of the more intimate milestones in life?
Do you remember in No Strings Attached when Ashton Kutcher’s character brings Natalie Portman’s character a balloon after they hook up for the first time? I think we need to bring that energy into our lives more often. I actually have a good amount of friends that waited until marriage to have sex — and aside from congratulating them on their weddings, sometimes I really just wanted to give them a big hug and a gift basket of everything I wish I had when I had sex for the first time.
Having sex for the first time can be so daunting, especially if you’re older than the age when the average person is losing their virginity (17!!). Sometimes, because you waited longer than the average person, the pressure can feel greater. For all my friends that have waited, a sex basket has been a really great way to make them feel a little better “prepared” to begin their sex lives.
Well, I say we normalize giving our friends sex baskets when they’re married — whether or not they’re losing their virginity. And I know, I know, at bachelorette parties we give lingerie and sometimes even a cheeky dildo, but for our really good friends (the ones we love and adore and wish the best sex lives on), I say we can take it a step further and give them everything they need to get it on in the best way.
Now the idea might seem a little weird to you, but I truly believe sex baskets are what’s missing from our society. Imagine if Rory had gifted Lane a sex basket as a wedding gift. She might have had sex she actually enjoyed and maybe, just maybe, she wouldn’t have gotten pregnant with twins and had to give up all her hopes and dreams.
I know we all love our friends but don’t think you have to give them every single one of these gifts. Mixing and matching a few of these are more than enough for the perfect starter-kit to great sex.
Lube
Even if you give your friend absolutely nothing else on this list, you need this one thing. Lube is the ultimate tool for a better sex life. You’re better off going with a silicone-based lube rather than a water-based lube because it’ll last longer, it’s non-irritating, and works well with condoms.
Couples Toy
You don’t have to get super freaky with it, but throwing in a couple’s toy for beginners can be a fun way for a couple to learn about playing together without too much pressure. Something low stakes like a cock ring can be exciting and pleasurable for both parties.
Vibrator
You won’t know what you like until you find out for yourself. Getting a solo sex toy for your friend will encourage solo exploration and give them an opportunity to learn more about their sexual likes or dislikes. Getting to know your body better helps you have better sex — and I swear by this mantra.
Massage Oil
We put so much emphasis on the sex that we forget to encourage foreplay. Massage oil is the perfect gift to add to your sex basket. It’ll encourage couples to touch each other more outside of just sex and just add a sexy scenario for them to build off of. Anything that builds intimacy will make for better sex.
Beginner’s BDSM Kit
Okay, not everyone is into kinky sex — and that’s okay! But that doesn’t mean you can’t give your friend the option to explore what they may like. Now, I’m not saying to go crazy and give them nipple clamps or a gag. But gifting fuzzy handcuffs, maybe a tiny paddle, or even a silk blindfold can help them find out if they might like sex a little less vanilla.
Sex Game
The best way to guarantee a great sex life is to make sure communication about sex is happening. That’s why I always like to include some sort of conversation-based sex game into my sex baskets.
