I like to consider myself a particularly horny girlie. I mean, you don’t become a sex writer by not liking sex. And when you’re single and horny like I am, it can be a deadly combination. So when a holiday like Valentine’s Day comes around, when it feels like everyone but you is having sex, I can totally understand someone in my position feeling… frustrated. So much so, in fact, that they might take to Twitter (we refuse to call it X) to share just how frustrated they are.
And while I haven’t reached the bubbling levels of exasperation it might cause someone to send out an unhinged and horny tweet online, I am so glad that there is a plethora of single and horny people like myself that do. So whether you’re in the same boat as us and want to feel seen, or you’re in a relationship and want to poke fun at our loneliness (oh, fuck you, btw), here are some of the most unhinged and horny tweets we’ve seen in quite some time.
Celebrate Valentine’s Day With The Most Unhinged and Horny Tweets
If you’re single on Valentine’s Day it’s cuz you’re ugly. Don’t ever forget that. If you looked better you would have the person you want
— jake (@huntichon) February 8, 2024
□ single
□ taken
☑ horny for attention— leah ★彡 (@strawb1rrymoon) February 11, 2024
I know a lot of y’all might be single this Valentimes Day, but do NOT fall prey to your horny yearnings, listen to this playlist instead https://t.co/ELGQsiRXmG
— Meech (@MediumSizeMeech) February 11, 2024
Single people scrolling through their tl on Valentine’s day pic.twitter.com/4rfh3mFWDN
— Chandler Bing Parody (@ChandlerBing_12) February 14, 2024
men will turn 30 and still be like “idk what i want :/“ & like u have 5 more years with hair so please figure it out
— gen🥂 (@genmxn) February 13, 2024
happy Valentine’s Day to all the single and fabulous ladies out there <3 pic.twitter.com/BDHVKDCGjG
— hannah (@dumbandfunn) February 14, 2024
happy valentines day to SINGLE PEOPLE ONLY. if ur in a relationship im happy for you but don’t bring that shit near me
— 🏳️⚧️ robin ☀︎ (@theyoyokbridge) February 14, 2024
if we start talking rn we can be in a decorated hotel by tonight
— FREEBANDZ🌟 (@bxbyyhxrii) February 14, 2024
:woozy_face: pic.twitter.com/JaSEJTsyw1
— 𝖇𝖊𝖊𝖗 𝖊𝖑𝖋 ☭ 🅃🄷🄴🅈/🅃🄷🄴🄼 (@crustelf) February 1, 2024
Anyone wanna come over and do this pic.twitter.com/0PxXsXU0xu
— kate bush’s husband (@airbagged) January 20, 2024
im so touched deprived i wouldn’t mind if someone fought me
— gill (@contactabrother) December 13, 2023
