Beyonce

I used to believe Us Weekly when they tried to convince me stars were “just like us.” I mean, can you blame me?

If you felt a random pain directly in your heart for no reason today, it may be due to an egregious act of blasphemy committed against Her Holiness The Queen Beyoncé.

If you ever went on a group trip to any major city in middle school, there’s a decent chance you spent an hour or two at Madame Tussauds wax museum.

Unless you’re a homeschooled jungle freak with no access to the Internet, you know that last week Beyonce announced the names of our new saviors her newborn twins as Sir & Rumi Carter respectively.

Last week, JAY-Z (he wants us to capitalize it now lol) put out a new album that you probably haven’t listened to because you’re not the kind of girl who pays for Tidal when you already have Spotify.

Our worlds summers came to a screeching halt when it became apparent that Bachelor in Paradise was probably canceled for the season, but like the patron saint she is, Beyoncé has come to rescue us all from a life of mundanity.

From the moment Blue Ivy Carter was born, we knew it was only a matter of time before she took over the world.