3 Things You Probably Didn’t Know About Ectopic Pregnancies, Like Mine

A little over a month ago I had emergency surgery to treat an ectopic pregnancy. 

It was scary and painful and unexpected and I am still recovering physically and emotionally. I am lucky to live somewhere where, when the doctors realized it was not a simple case of appendicitis and I was already open on the operating table, they did not hesitate to perform the surgery that saved my life. My abdomen was already full of blood, and my fallopian tube on that side—which had to be surgically removed—was ruptured due to the expanding embryo. I was about five and a half weeks pregnant at the time (I know specifically, down to the day, since I’m an IVF patient). If it had been possible to preserve the pregnancy somehow, I would have done it happily, but science hasn’t found that path yet. 

Some questions I ask myself: Was it an abortion, since an implanted, fertilized embryo was removed from my body? Was it a miscarriage, since it could never have grown to term, no matter what anyone did? Does it matter? To me, it doesn’t, since the outcome would always be the same, and I have absolutely no issue referring to it as an abortion. An ectopic pregnancy is never viable, and I was already bleeding internally when I went into surgery. To the rest of the world in a post-Roe v. Wade society, that seems to be a very important question. Whatever you want to call the operation that was performed on me, it saved my life. I just wanted to take a minute to remind people of that, especially the Supreme Court and certain Oklahoma senators who ask why exceptions to trigger law abortion bans have to include treatment for ectopic pregnancies. (Because they lead to death. That’s why. Without care, you die.)

I was genuinely surprised by the way my ectopic pregnancy unfolded, and by the things I found out after—from how common they really are, to signs that you should go to the hospital.

It’s Not As Rare As You Think

According to the American Pregnancy Association, the rate of ectopic pregnancies is 1 in 50, or roughly 1 to 2%. To me, that doesn’t sound that rare at all, even though it is still classified as a rare diagnosis. I felt this on a physical level when I came into the emergency room and it still took over 12 hours to get me into surgery, and even then it was for what was assumed to be appendicitis, not an ectopic pregnancy. There is a genuine misconception that it’s such an uncommon diagnosis that it probably isn’t happening to you. 

Here’s another kicker: it’s slightly more common in IVF patients, so I was already at a higher risk. There are other risk factors I didn’t have, but even having one seems like enough of a reason to consider it more seriously early on. I think a part of me was also a bit in denial, and I kept hoping the doctor would tell me I could go home. It’s a good thing I didn’t.

It’s The Leading Cause Of Maternal Death In the First Trimester

If an embryo implants anywhere but the uterus, it isn’t a viable pregnancy and requires medical treatment. In cases like mine where the ectopic pregnancy is in the fallopian tube and the tube has ruptured, surgery is necessary. I don’t need my fallopian tubes as much now that I’ve moved from IUI (intrauterine insemination) to IVF (in vitro fertilization), because the embryo will be implanted directly by a doctor as opposed to a fertilized egg traveling down my tubes. That’s my silver lining: one less tube, one less potential problem! 

Ectopic pregnancies can be diagnosed at different stages, and not all need emergency surgery like mine, but they are the leading cause of maternal death in the first trimester. That’s a scary statistic. They do happen, and when they do, they’re dangerous—even if they are caught early on and can be treated without surgery.

Getting A Diagnosis Can Be Confusing

I wasn’t bleeding, as far as I could tell. I wouldn’t find out about the internal bleeding until later.  My stomach felt distended and uncomfortable, but bloating is common in early pregnancy. I’ve always had digestive issues, so the G.I. symptoms and pressure weren’t all that uncommon, either. I think the real moment when I should have started feeling more alarmed was when I had intense pain and extreme pressure in my lower abdomen on one side. 

I remember a moment where I was on my hands and knees on the bathroom floor. When I stood up, my legs shook uncontrollably and I had to try not to pass out. I went to the emergency room shortly after that; it was probably in those minutes that my tube ruptured fully. For the next 12 hours or so, some of the sharpest pain subsided, but there was a consistent throbbing, sick feeling in my stomach. It still took hours and hours to diagnose. So my advice would be to seek help immediately if you have pain like mine, and to ask the doctor early on if an ectopic pregnancy could be possible. I assumed that because I’d told the treating doctor in the emergency room that I was pregnant, they’d take the possibility into account, but sometimes (always, as someone with a uterus seeking care) you do have to push harder. Don’t dismiss it, or wait to see if it gets better, and ask to talk to the ob-gyn on call if you can’t see your own. The sooner treatment can be given, the better.

When I woke up from what I thought was an emergency appendectomy to a doctor telling me I’d actually been treated for an ectopic pregnancy, I was devastated. But I also knew that I was alive, that my fertility treatment didn’t depend on my fallopian tubes, and that I could probably try IVF again. In all the time spent trying to get pregnant, an ectopic pregnancy wasn’t an outcome I expected—and I thought I was prepared for all the worst possibilities: failed embryo transfers, miscarriages, complications, the works. But this one I didn’t see coming.

It’s important to realize ectopic pregnancy happens more than you’d think, and when it does, it can be life-threatening. I’m lucky to be healing well from that day. Every day I feel stronger. It’s a weird sensation, to feel lucky after having gone through what I did, but I received the care I needed in time. That’s a miracle in itself in this country right now.

Images: Sergey Filimonov /Stocksy.com

What I Wish I’d Known Before Starting Fertility Treatments

This November, my wife and I checked off a depressing anniversary: one year of trying for a baby. As two halves of a same-sex marriage, both of us women, we’ve been in doctor’s offices for the past year undergoing IUI, or intrauterine insemination. A year might not sound like a long time in that sense, but in terms of money and effort and knowing we’ve had perfectly timed attempts again and again, it feels like an eternity. When we first started this process, technically there was no “infertility” diagnosis; we were just a same-sex couple who always knew we’d at least need assistance in acquiring sperm, if nothing else, or so we thought. But it’s become more complicated than that.

The procedure of IUI is performed in a doctor’s office. The short story of what happens is that when your body is ready for ovulation, which can mean medications for days before that to stimulate the ovaries, an injection is performed that prompts ovulation and you release one or more eggs depending on how many have grown to maturity (typically one, but sometimes more on medication). About a day after that injection is given, a doctor uses a speculum to open the cervix and a catheter (flexible, tubey thing) to insert the sperm directly into the uterus, not just into the vagina. So fun! The goal is for those sperm to swim up into the Fallopian tube, meet the egg, and then for the fertilized egg to descend, implant in the uterus and grow. We are using donor sperm purchased through a sperm bank, which is pricey and can be hard to acquire (our donor has a waitlist that took us months to get on), so we decided to basically get straight into a fertility center to make sure we had professional, medical support as we tried to conceive. 

It’s hard to talk about this process for a variety of reasons; mostly, because it hasn’t worked yet, but also because trying to have a baby is incredibly personal no matter how you go about it. It’s intimate and important whether you’re at home or in a doctor’s office. Also, most stories of infertility are told at the end, after success has been achieved. I want to share from the middle, the dead center of the mess, still trying to navigate through the storm. We’re not at the finish line yet and I don’t know how long it’ll take or what method will finally get us to the other side, where we get to become parents. I’ve stopped trying to guess. But this isn’t a situation that is valid only once you’ve achieved the goal. We’re in the hard part, and that’s an important perspective to be standing in. We are in crying-on-the-couch, going-through-it mode. We always knew we would need some help getting pregnant since we’re both women and lack “access to sperm,” as our doctor hilariously put it, but we were not prepared for the length of time it’s taken, the ups and downs of the process along the way, and how much of the unknown we would face that I had absolutely no concept of before we started.

The Doctors Know A Lot, But Not Everything

Even with two uteruses, great doctors, and good odds, every case is different and the treatments aren’t foolproof. There is a lot of guesswork involved about how your body will respond to certain treatments and hormones and it doesn’t always happen the way you, or your doctor, expect. Even with drugs, and ultrasounds, and doctors we trust, we’ve had round after round of failed intrauterine inseminations. And the worst part is that, most of the time, the exact reason why is unknown. It could be the egg, or an insufficient uterine lining, or something else entirely. The egg could have been fertilized but failed to implant, or the egg and sperm could have failed to fertilize at all. Even when you know the exact day of ovulation, the size of the follicle down to the millimeter, or the precise thickness of the uterine lining, the reason it still doesn’t work isn’t always clear. It can take time and a lot of effort to create the perfectly balanced cocktail of medications, timing, and internal environment to make things work, and there are more factors than I ever realized.

The Roller Coaster Your Month Will Become

It’s not just the infamous TWW that’s difficult, which is the two-week waiting period after insemination is performed when you’re waiting to get, or miss, your period. There are doctor’s visits to check your follicles to make sure they’re maturing at the right rate, evaluate uterine lining levels, and did I mention every single one of those visits involves a vaginal ultrasound? None of this is happening in those cute abdominal ultrasounds like in the movies where they squeal and giggle because the gel is too cold. It’s way too early on for abdominal ultrasounds, which means every single appointment, there’s a probe inserted vaginally. The doctors are good at it, but even so, it’s like having a Pap smear three times a week. Most people don’t even mention that part in the struggle to get pregnant, which is a testament to the fucking strength of people with uteruses. It’s such a hard process already that being subjected to invasive vaginal examinations day in and day out just becomes part of the gig. But I’ll tell you about it, because I’m not tough, and I love to complain. And it’s not just uncomfortable and inconvenient: it’s an upheaval of your whole day-to-day life. I kind of just thought we’d live normally, come in on the day of insemination, and then get pregnant and move on. And for some people I’m sure that’s true, but not for us. There are consults and tests, and meds that work and meds that don’t, and then appointments and procedures, and more tests. Each little piece of news, good or bad, can derail your day, or week, or month. 

Expect The Unexpected

If someone had told me that after a year of attempts, we’d be moving on to other even more expensive, invasive methods because no one was pregnant yet, I would have cackled. Two healthy women, both under the age of 30 when we started, using high-quality donor sperm. It seemed like we’d get pregnant in the first few rounds. Then, we didn’t, and half a year had somehow passed by. We had another unwelcome surprise when blood tests and ultrasounds diagnosed me with PCOS, which stands for polycystic ovary syndrome, and can manifest in different ways but for me tends to result in my body ovulating on a very irregular schedule, or not at all, which means I need more help getting pregnant and probably would even if I were in a straight relationship. We always knew we’d need sperm, but to need this much medical help in trying to conceive is unexpected. And those are big picture surprises. Smaller picture, there have also been roadblocks. One medication resulted in me developing between four and six mature follicles, which is so many my cycle was nearly canceled. Another medication resulted in me having an ideal uterine lining measurement for pregnancy, but no follicles ready to release a mature egg, so back to square one we went, reversing all the gains made in my uterus in the process. Every person with a uterus is different, and while I may be especially tricky, I have been consistently and genuinely surprised by how difficult it’s been to wrangle my cycle and my body. Coming into this with an admittedly casual mindset, adjusting to the big picture reality as well as riding the smaller waves, has been intense. 

The Most Difficult Part Isn’t The Money, Although That Part Does Suck

You know the quote, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results? That sums up going through infertility treatments. It’s the biggest leap of faith out there. You are trying to make something out of basically nothing, or at the very least, out of microscopic body parts you can’t even see, and then hoping it sticks. You are trying to create actual life over and over again. And when it doesn’t work, that loss is felt like just that: a loss. You technically can’t lose something you never had, but that carved-out feeling of pain is still there as the future you’re trying so hard to move toward just takes another step away from you. The more times you try, the harder it is, because you start having to deal with problems you could easily avoid if you were already pregnant. Just shipping donor sperm to our clinic alone costs hundreds of dollars. Ordering new medications for another attempt. Trying to calculate how much sperm is left, how many more vials we’ll need, trying not to panic at how many we’ve gone through already just in the process of trying, with nothing to show for it until someone is pregnant. There’s no moving on to the next step of our lives until we can surmount this one. If we were already pregnant, we could start thinking about buying baby stuff and telling our families and moving on to the fun parts. Instead, every negative test is like a step backward. It means another try, another month—at least—of money and time and procedures. Yet, we do it. We try again and again. And I’m proud every time. It’s brave to try again where you’ve just failed. If I’d known how long this would take and how complicated it’s been, I might have been afraid to try at all. A lot of the adjustment has just been accepting that I don’t know when it’s going to happen or when it’s going to work. There is some comfort in knowing we’re doing the best we can.

My wife said the other day that you cling on to the good stories, the ones you hear about where couples get pregnant the first try or early on, and you push the bad ones away and just hope your story will be one of the easy ones. I’ve lost faith many times this year and there have been times it felt like I was free-falling into an abyss. What I’ve tried to remember is that we are not on the edge of a cliff. We’re on a bridge. We’re taking steps to get to the other side. That’s sometimes all you can do.

Image: Sergey Filimonov /Stocksy.com

Why Paris Hilton Is Coming Under Fire For Talking About IVF

Infertility is a problem many people struggle with, and although it is often considered only a woman’s condition, both men and women can contribute to it. While the topic has long been considered hush-hush, in recent years, conversations about fertility struggles are becoming more normalized, with even celebrities opening up about their difficulties. Typically, you’d expect that when a celebrity publicly discusses issues related to infertility, they would be met with an outpouring of support. Not so for Paris Hilton, whose recent comments about her decision to undergo IVF are causing outrage.

On a recent episode of a podcast called The Trend Reporter With MaraHilton opened up about her decision to start a family, remarking that she and her boyfriend Carter Reum had decided to try IVF. She explained that her friend Kim Kardashian was the one who recommended IVF in the first place, saying that before Kardashian’s recommendation, “I didn’t even know anything about it.”

The CDC reports that 1 to 2 percent of all U.S. births annually happen via IVF, and according to WebMD, only about 5% of couples with infertility seek out IVF, so Hilton’s decision to speak publicly about her decision to undergo the process is significant. Although infertility is a fairly common struggle that couples go through, with about 1 in 8 couples having trouble getting pregnant or sustaining a pregnancy, the stigma of it persists, and women may be on the receiving end of the worst of that stigma. According to a 2019 survey conducted by Modern Fertility, about 1 in 5 women reported that they experienced discrimination or prejudice because of their infertility, which led to them feeling guilt and shame. In addition, 59% of the women who participated in the survey felt that women who are infertile are unfairly treated.

So while Hilton being open about her decision to undergo IVF is commendable and can help lessen the stigma for other women and couples going through the same process, her reasons for going that route are coming under fire. Hilton explains on the podcast, “We wanna have twins first, and then I don’t know, like either 3 or 4 children.” When host Mara Schiavocampo asks if she’s considered surrogacy, because it’s kind of hard to plan twins, Hilton reveals, “we have been doing the IVF so I can pick twins if I like.” Later on, when Schiavocampo asks Hilton what made her decide to undergo IVF, Hilton explains, “I think it’s just something that most women should do just to have, and then you can pick if you want boys or girls … I want to have twins that are a boy and a girl, so the only way to 100% get that is by making it happen that way.”

Hilton’s comments quickly earned backlash and were called “insensitive”. First, there’s the casual remark that every woman should just undergo IVF just to be able to have the option of it, which completely leaves out the fact that for many people, IVF is prohibitively expensive. The average IVF cycle can cost anywhere from $12,000 to $17,000 before medication and not including genetic testing, and it may or may not be covered by insurance. Furthermore, it usually requires more than one round. Most people are not Paris Hilton with net worths of $300 million, and doing IVF is a huge financial undertaking.

And that’s saying nothing of the intense emotional and physical side-effects. Felice Gersh, M.D., an award-winning OB/GYN and founder/director of the Integrative Medical Group of Irvine, in Irvine, CA and the author of PCOS SOS Fertility Fast Track, tells Betches that with IVF, there is a risk of “tubal pregnancy and hyperstimulation of ovaries leading to very enlarged ovaries and illness from too much estrogen produced.” This is on top of “all the issues of any pregnancy”, plus the risks of any procedures, such as infections and bleeding. Most common? The “risk of failure and disappointment and emotional toll is great,” she says.

There’s also the fact that having twins, even through IVF, is risky for both the mother and babies. According to the Fertility Institute, IVF multiple birth risks include the babies being born preterm (almost 60% of twins and 90% of triplets are delivered preterm), which can in turn result in low birth weight and increased risk of long-term issues such as cerebral palsy, vision loss, and hearing loss. There are also serious risks to the mother; complications such as gestational diabetes and preeclampsia are more common in twin pregnancies. (Kim Kardashian suffered from preeclampsia during her pregnancies, which is why she ultimately decided to use a surrogate after the birth of her second child). Twin pregnancy is also associated with greater life-threatening maternal complications. Also, age is one of the most common risk factors for high-risk pregnancies, with women over 35 being at greater risk. Hilton is 39. The point is, having twins through IVF at any age should not be taken lightly. Dr. Gersh emphasizes that undergoing IVF with the express purpose of having twins “should never be the goal, as multiple gestational increase risks to the mom and babies.”

And while Dr. Gersh says that “male and female factors for infertility are the usual reasons” for choosing IVF, couples sometimes go this route “to choose gender due to sex linked disease.” Gender selection can happen during IVF if parents choose to have their embryos screened for genetic abnormalities. During that process, the doctors can also look at the sex of the embryo, at which point, parents can choose the embryo. Chrissy Teigen did this when she was pregnant with her daughter Luna. She subsequently was criticized for choosing her child’s sex, forcing her to explain that it was only one part of the process, writing on Twitter, “I think I made a mistake in thinking people understood the process better than they do.” Dr. Gersh says that choosing the sex “would be a personal decision between all concerned” and “is not an issue in the vast majority of cases.”

That said, there are couples who specifically undergo IVF so they can choose the sex of their baby, a practice which is controversial, and Hilton’s comments seem to imply that she may fall into the latter camp.

Shannon M. Clark, MD, MMS, FACOG and creator of the Instagram accounts @babiesafter35, responded to Hilton’s comments in a number of IGTV videos. She asserts, “The idea of being able to ‘pick twins if I like’ is not only incorrect, it’s dangerous and it’s irresponsible to put out there as a choice that anyone could have—because it’s not a choice that anyone could have.” She adds, “IVF is not available to everyone, and twins are a high-risk pregnancy.”

That said, we do not know precisely Hilton’s reasons for undergoing IVF, and given that she is 39 years old, she may very well have been struggling with infertility. Gender selection may have been a plus side of, but not the entire reason for, undergoing IVF. Still, the way she expressed it was flippant, and that could potentially have adverse consequences (though I kind of doubt anyone is seriously looking to Paris Hilton for family planning advice). We may never know exactly why Hilton is undergoing IVF unless she tells us, and the backlash to these comments might make her less inclined  to open up any further. Her comments were out-of-touch and IVF is not feasible for everyone (for a multitude of reasons), and just because Hilton did not seem to experience serious side-effects does not mean it is an easy process. That said, there is a way to correct and provide context for her statements without coming for her personally, and unless we are told otherwise, we should give her the benefit of the doubt in assuming that she made the best decision for herself and her family under the guidance of medical professionals.

Images: Andrea Raffin / Shutterstock.com;

IVF Is Hard AF & I’m Glad Amy Schumer Isn’t Afraid To Say It

Amy Schumer recently posted about her experience with IVF and freezing her eggs. Spoilers: it f*cking blows. I did the same process in November when I froze my eggs—when you freeze your eggs, you’re undergoing the same hormone injection process as IVF—and it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to go through (and that’s coming from a stage IV cancer patient). And it was only two weeks! There is such a stigma around women and anything to do with children already. If you have trouble conceiving, there’s something wrong with you. If you don’t want kids, you suck. If you can’t breastfeed, the way you raise your child, etc, etc, etc. Women are constantly getting sh*t on in the fertility department for absolutely everything. Maybe it’s because of this that women, especially famous women, just don’t talk about IVF very often. In fact, a bunch of celebrities now hide their pregnancies and children just to get some privacy away from all of society’s opinions, and I don’t even blame them.

But look. IVF or egg freezing is really, really hard. And it’s hard when you’re a nobody and it’s hard when you’re Amy Schumer. Which is why I was honestly really glad when Amy posted this super real photo:

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I’m a week into IVF and feeling really run down and emotional. If anyone went through it and if you have any advice or wouldn’t mind sharing your experience with me please do. My number is in my bio. We are freezing my eggs and figuring out what to do to give Gene a sibling. ❤️

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That bruising on either side of her stomach are from the daily injections to get your ovaries bigger than grapefruits (SERIOUSLY) to release a ton of eggs at once. Amy wrote that she’s “feeling really run down and emotional” and is only a week into her injections. Girl, been there.

For the record, the injections are insanely brutal. I ended up with three daily injections that I couldn’t do myself, so I went to the clinic every single day. At first, it’s like, “Yeah it sucks getting shots every day”, but then you go about your business and it’s NBD. But then things change—and quickly. By day three, you’re starting to bloat, you’re super emotional, and your sensitivity increases. And then it just landslides. What’s worse than getting three injections a day, you ask? Doing it when your skin feels raw and every needle feels like a white-hot electric nerve. You’re also getting an invasive ultrasound with what feels like a f*cking dildo and blood work almost every day. And even better? One of the injections burns like the fire of a thousand suns straight into your soul. F*CK Menopur, guys.

I looked four months pregnant, I was so sick I couldn’t get off the couch, I could barely eat, and everything in my whole body hurt. The hormones also make you feel insane. It feels like torture, and then you just go back every day for more. By Day 10, I was too fainty and lightheaded and sick to drive, so I had a friend take me every day. My veins receded from all the blood draws. On day 11, they did the ultrasound and barely touched my giant grapefruit ovary, and I still started sobbing hysterically because it hurt so bad (I was that sensitive). On day 12, I told the doctor that I was going to kill myself or her or both of us if she didn’t trigger me (an injection that releases your eggs so that they can harvest them) that day. Day 13, a celebrity I love (that I’m not going to out for being at the fertility office) saw me essentially throwing a tantrum like a toddler before my injections, but thank GOD that was my last day.

And the worst part? No one warns you about this part of it. Probably because they don’t want to scare you. It’s similar with my cancer treatment. The oncologist told me that the meds work and I won’t be that sick from chemo. Has she ever done it? No? Then you don’t get to say that. (And btw, I’m totally sick from chemo and they can’t give me any more meds, hi.)

Bottom line, it’s important that we talk about this and that women who go through this process understand that it sucks for all of us and you’re not alone. That’s why it’s really cool and important to see someone like Amy Schumer be so vulnerable and admit how hard it is. It really did break me, even though the process takes a relatively short amount of time. I also learned that it’s a really good thing I’m just a writer and not like, someone with government secrets, because I assure you, I would crack immediately at the slightest discomfort.

More celebrities being honest and upfront about the difficulties women go through when trying to conceive helps all of us feel less alone. Being a woman is really hard and can suck in a lot of ways, but it’s comforting in a weird way to know that even the rich and famous have these same issues.

Good luck with your egg harvest, Amy! And once again, F*CK Menopur.

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🥚

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Images: DFree / Shutterstock.com; amyschumer / Instagram

5 Common Misconceptions About Fertility

Let’s face it. Infertility is just one of those things in life that sneaks up on you, and you may not know until you’re trying to get pregnant. Once you realize you’re part of more than 6 million women whom it affects, it can feel completely overwhelming. The great thing is we live in an era of the best possible fertility treatments available. Family balancing, economic factors, and delay in childbearing have all lead to the increased demand in assisted reproductive technologies, but how much do you really know about them? For starters, more than 7 million women have utilized infertility services. Since information about fertility treatments isn’t typically discussed outside of the doctor’s office, let’s set the record straight on some common misconceptions about fertility.

1. You Don’t Need To Worry About Fertility Until You’re Ready To Get Pregnant

Just because your biological clock isn’t ticking yet doesn’t mean you shouldn’t consider where your fertility stands. Approximately 12% of women in the US have impaired fertility. After you turn 30 (!!!) your egg quality decreases, so it’s better to start fertility treatment with the best quality eggs—meaning when you still have a good selection available. If you’re thinking about becoming pregnant in the future, but your biological clock isn’t ticking quite loudly enough yet, freezing your eggs is a helpful option to “stop the clock,” so to speak.

This option isn’t just for those between the ages of 35 and 40. If you’re younger but focused on your career, traveling, or something other than starting a family, having the option to potentially conceive later can give you some peace of mind.

And when you are finally ready, be sure to visit a fertility doctor for an assessment. In addition to conducting an initial assessment of your ovarian reserve, they can teach you how to get your best chance of properly conceiving.

2. You’re Too Young (Or Old) To Consider Fertility Treatments

 

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Boom.

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Tired Hollywood movie plots tend to make it appear as though infertility will only hit once you turn 35, but that’s not the case. A woman is actually defined as facing infertility if she is not able to get pregnant after one year of well-timed intercourse (if you’re under 35) and 6 months of well-timed intercourse (if you’re over 35). If you’re under 35 and can get pregnant but have experienced multiple miscarriages, this is also considered to be a cause of infertility.

If you’re younger, your odds are higher that you’ll be successful with fertility treatments. If you’re over the age of 35, your chances of getting pregnant decreases, but a fertility doctor can work with you to see what your best options are for fertility treatments.

3. You’re Guaranteed To Conceive If You Use In Vitro Fertilization (IVF)

While using IVF doesn’t come with any guarantee you’ll become pregnant, it does increase your chances of conceiving, especially if you’ve been trying. Ultimately, your success rate is determined by your age.

If you’re 35 or younger, a single IVF treatment can increase your odds of conceiving to 50-60 percent. The use of next-generation sequencing in the screening of embryos for transfer has also led to shorter duration of time to successful pregnancies. For context, your chances of conceiving naturally during any cycle is less than 25 percent. And if you’re dealing with infertility, you may have less than a 5 percent chance of becoming pregnant. Generally speaking, about two-thirds of women treated for infertility end up having successful pregnancies.

4. You’ll Have Twins Or Triplets If You Use Fertility Treatments

No, you probably won’t end up as an Octomom. Though your chances of getting pregnant with more than one child increases with fertility treatments, not everyone experiences this. All in all, your risk of developing twins is less than 2 percent, and there are ways to control it—like choosing to have just one embryo transferred during IVF. Intrauterine insemination (IUI) can also inform how high your risk is of having multiples, since it allows your fertility doctor to predict the number of mature eggs that your body will ovulate.

5. IVF Is The Only Option

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We all are. . . Up to 25% OFF select Mother’s Day Gifts today!

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IVF is actually not the first choice when it comes to fertility treatment. If you can conceive naturally, that’s your best bet, but if you’re facing fertility issues and you’re younger than 38, your fertility doctor will go the IUI route (usually a minimum of 3 cycles). You’ll have lower chances of conceiving with an IUI cycle compared to IVF, but it is less invasive and most young women who have fertility issues do end up becoming pregnant with this treatment. If you don’t conceive within three cycles, your fertility doctor will typically recommend trying IVF as the next option.

By no means is this list exhaustive of the questions you may have about infertility. Even if there’s a chance you may want children later in life, ask your fertility doctor so you can have all your information straight from the source. They can help you make a decision about whether it will be maybe-baby in the future and create an action plan to get there.

Dr. Ho is a board-certified OB/GYN and board-certified in Reproductive Endocrinology and Infertility. Dr. Ho has over 30 years of experience and is very proficient in treating patients of all backgrounds but specializes in treating patients of Asian descent. He has assisted elite clientele, including authoritative government officials and high-end celebrities in Vietnam.

Images: Dr. Ho; scary mommy (2) / Instagram