So, you know how sometimes you’re curled up with a glass of wine and a good book, and suddenly you’re transported into a world where every glance is loaded with tension and every touch is electric? Well, diving into these steamy romance novels might be doing more for you than just giving you butterflies. In a recent TIME article, Myisha Battle, sex & dating coach and author of This is Supposed to Be Fun, wrote about a client who turned to the Bridgerton book series to reignite her sexuality. Through this coaching session, the certified clinical sexologist discovered the ~health benefits~ of reading smut. Let’s break down why your favorite spicy reads are basically self-care in paperback form.
Rev Up That Desire Engine
Let’s talk about “responsive desire.” Sounds fancy, but it’s really just the mind getting into the game before the body catches up. “For many people, sexual desire doesn’t arise spontaneously from within, but rather needs specific contexts or interactions to emerge,” sexologist and relationship expert Jenn Gunsaullus, PhD, tells Betches. “In long-term relationships, it’s common for at least one partner to experience sexual interest that is only triggered by external stimuli, emotional connection, or particular situations.”
Battle writes that unlike spontaneous desire (you know, when you’re just randomly in the mood out of nowhere), responsive desire needs a little coaxing. And guess what? Your go-to romance novel is the perfect warm-up. By getting lost in stories where the tension is so thick you could cut it with a knife, you’re mentally setting the stage for your own sexual arousal. So, if you’re finding your sex drive hitting the snooze button more often than not, maybe it’s time to let a werewolf-vampire love triangle stir things up.
Escape the Boring AF Reality
Let’s be real — life can get repetitive, and not always in a good way. That’s where romance novels come in. According to Battle, they’re your ticket out of the daily grind and into a world where every moment is charged with passion, longing, and (let’s be honest) some pretty epic makeout sessions. When your day-to-day feels like a snooze fest, these books can reignite that spark by whisking you away to a place where love stories are dramatic, messy, and oh-so-addictive.
Safe Spaces for Sexy Thoughts
Here’s a little secret: your brain loves exploring fantasies in a safe and controlled way. And according to Battle, romance novels create the perfect mental playground for this. They’re like a guilt-free way to explore your desires without the awkwardness of real-life scenarios. Whether you’re into brooding dukes or star-crossed lovers, these stories give you a judgment-free zone to figure out what really gets your engine going. Plus, it’s way safer than diving into the wild world of internet searches (trust me, don’t go there).
Finally, Diverse Stories We Actually Care About
Romance novels have had a glow-up, and it’s about damn time. Battle points out that the genre is now packed with diverse voices, featuring stories that reflect the lives of people from all walks of life. We’re talking about books that don’t just show love through a heteronormative, white lens, but bring in the rich experiences of LGBTQIA+ communities, people of color, and those with disabilities. Finding characters that look like you or share your experiences? That’s what we call peak relatability. And let’s be honest, it hits different when the love story on the page actually reflects your reality.
Discover Your Inner Romance Expert
Reading romance isn’t just about getting lost in someone else’s love life — it’s also a low-key way to figure out your own. Battle notes that these stories can be mirrors, reflecting back to you what you actually want in your own relationships. By living vicariously through fictional characters, you might just uncover what kind of love story you’re craving IRL. Maybe you’re into the slow burn or perhaps you’re all about the whirlwind romance — either way, these books help you get to know yourself better.
“I’ve observed with some of my female clients who struggle with sexual expression that romance novels can provide the permission and courage needed to be more sexual and passionate with their partners,” Dr. Gunsaullus says.
All the Feels, No Strings Attached
One of the best things about romance novels is that they’re emotional rollercoasters you can step off whenever you want. Battle highlights how these books let you dive deep into intense feelings — love, lust, heartbreak, and joy — without the real-world consequences. You get to experience all the highs and lows of a love story, but once you close the book, you’re back in your own world, no strings attached. It’s the emotional workout you didn’t know you needed.
The next time someone gives you side-eye for reading your “trashy” romance novel, just hit them with the facts. These spicy reads are doing wonders for your mind, body, and soul. So, whether you’re a fan of historical bodice-rippers or contemporary rom-coms, know that you’re indulging in a “guilty pleasure” you shouldn’t feel guilty about at all — it’s actually good for you.
“As long as you’re not using romance novels to escape from your life or neglect your priorities, including your partner, romance novels can offer sexual benefits for people in relationships,” Dr. Gunsaullus says. Now, excuse me while I dive back into my own fictional love affair.
