Bridgerton Boy Starter Pack: You Don’t Want A Boyfriend, You Want A Bridgerton

I want to personally thank my girl, Shonda Rhimes, for bringing back the true yearners of the world via the Bridgerton brothers. Why would we settle for the Chuck Basses and Bigs when we can have one of the lover boys Violet Bridgerton blessed us with? (She’s obviously a master at parenting simps.) I mean, after three seasons of Bridgerton, I think it’s safe to say that we collectively don’t just want boyfriends — we want Bridgertons.

And for good reason, too. Who else is going to say things like, “Do you think that there is a corner of this Earth that you could travel to far away enough to free me from this torment?” Or do what Colin did in the carriage? Not a Salvatore brother, I’ll tell you that much.

But there’s an art in capturing a Bridgerton brother — I mean, *the heart of* a Bridgerton brother. Ok, I know that the Bridgertons don’t actually exist, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t men just like that out there. I know dating is very bleak out there, but all hope is not lost. You just need to keep a mental checklist so you know what to look out for. Here is the Bridgerton Boyfriend Starter Pack.

Image Credit: Netflix

An Awful Haircut That, Once Fixed, Will Reveal A Stud

Whenever it’s not someone’s main season, they have the goofiest haircut imaginable. But as soon as it’s time for the love story to shine, the sideburns are gone, the hair is grown out, and it’s coiffed ever so perfectly. So you might want to do some Insta stalking to see if they had a major transformation recently.

A Mischievous Mother Whose Husband Was The Love Of Her Life

Typically, a nosey mother on a man sounds like the worst possible situation, but when they’re meddling for the sake of making sure their son finds true love? We’ll allow it. I mean, think about where any of the Bridgerton siblings would be without Violet’s dabbling.

Either Your Worst Enemy Or Your Best Friend

Whether you’re into an enemies-to-lovers trope or something more along the lines of friends-to-lovers, the basic rule here is to find someone you have really intense feelings for. But you want to be careful about the enemies-to-lovers thing — you don’t want to go for someone you legitimately hate or vice-versa. You just want someone who gets under your skin in a way no one else can.

Someone Who Has Had A Slutty Phase

I hate to say it, but any relationship that’s worked out on Bridgerton has been after the man in the equation has loved and lost and also spent considerable time in a brothel. I know, I know! The double standards are atrocious, but hey, I’m not telling you not to have a slutty phase. I’m just saying if you’re looking to recreate the mirror scene, you’re going to want someone who’s been around the block.

Rich AF

I’m sorry, but part of the Bridgerton charm is that those boys are very well-off. A man telling you any of the things Anthony Bridgerton has said without a sizable bank account is just scientifically not as hot. I’m not not looking for a man in finance, trust fund, etc.