5 Childhood Crushes Who Turned Out To Be Complete Trash

Cancel culture is by far the best thing to come out of the last decade. Sure, in some cases it can be hurtful and uncalled for, but so is polishing off an entire box of wine over the course of 72 hours. What’s your point? I, for one, am living for cancel culture, and not just because it speaks to the blackest, pettiest parts of my heart (though that is certainly a plus). There’s something to be said for holding people accountable for their actions, for holding a mirror up to all of their wrongs and saying “you know why, YOU KNOW WHY.” And in the past decade, no one has been called out more for their bullsh*t than powerful men, especially in Hollywood. Canceling sexy, powerful men (aside from being a sexual fetish of mine) feels like a long time coming and a necessary part of moving forward as a society. My vote has always been to isolate the men in an underground bunker and only let them out for breeding purposes or until they’ve learned to behave themselves, but my therapist calls this plan “troubling” and “something to discuss in our next session.” For now, I suppose, I’ll just have to settle for tarnishing their reputations and banishing their names and negative energy from the mainstream media. Sighs.

So, as we approach a new year and a new decade, let’s take a look at all of the men we need to cancel forever and finally leave behind (to hopefully eat sh*t and die):

James Franco

James Franco

Talk about a 10 year challenge. No one has aged less well than James Franco. I’m not gonna lie, but back in the day I was a huge fan of Franco’s, and that had everything to do with his role as tortured (but sexy) knight in the romantic drama Tristian & Isolde. But little did I know that while I was swooning over hot beach sex and painful British accents, our boy James was out here allegedly manipulating and sexually exploiting the struggling, young actresses of LA. This is why we can’t have nice things, James!! 

Back in 2018, and in the wake of #MeToo, several women from James’ acting school, Studio 4, came forward and alleged that this highly esteemed “school” was actually just an elaborate ploy to take advantage of young women. Furthermore, the $300 highly sought after “classes” taught at his “school” allegedly involved women disrobing in front of James and his pals. Hmm. This feels less like honing one’s craft and more like a page out of Harvey Weinstein’s playbook, but okay. Recently, two of the five women who came forward filed a lawsuit against James and I’m really hoping they take him for everything he’s worth. I always say, there’s no better way to start a new year than by watching a man be financially ruined. Cheers!

Nate Parker

Nate Parker

I was today years old when I found out that Nate Parker, actor and former man of my dreams, is actually a flaming piece of sh*t. For those of you who don’t know, Nate Parker rose to fame after his role in The Great Debaters and, more recently, The Birth of a Nation. But I know him from Beyond the Lights, an OSCAR WORTHY movie, about hip-hop artist Noni who doesn’t want to be anyone’s music video hoe, she just wants to get back to making real music, and the sexy but sensitive cop who helps her find herself. So, as I’m sitting here WEEPING at the scene where Nate Parker whispers “I see you” to Noni, I find out that in real life Nate Parker has a very dark and troubling past that involves allegedly sexually assaulting a woman in college. 

While attending Penn State in the late 1990s, Parker and his wrestling buddy were accused, and actually tried in a court of law, of raping a female student. Parker was found not guilty while his pal was found guilty, only to have his conviction overturned. With all the hype surrounding Parker’s new movie, The Birth of a Nation, the case has come back into the spotlight with renewed interest, and the information surrounding the case is… troubling to say the least. The victim alleged that she was too drunk to consent to sex, and that after she accused Parker and his friend of rape, she was harassed on campus by Parker and his friends so much so that she “feared for her life.” I’m not going to get into the full story here, but if you’d like to read more about the case (and you absolutely should) then this Vulture article is a great read. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m just going to go quietly weep for Noni and her monster of a prince charming.

Brad Pitt

Brad Pitt

First of all, I’d just like to say that I was never a fan of Brad’s. Not only do I think his acting is subpar (I said what I said!), but it goes against every bone of my deeply feminist body to support a philanderer like him. I have to save that kind of compassion and forgiveness for my own romantic relationships with cheating assholes, obviously. That said, he is good-looking, and in the last 10 years he has done nothing but further sully his own reputation so, congratulations Brad, you made my hit list. Bravo. 

I think by now we all remember the infamous plane incident of 2016 that resulted in Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie getting a divorce after nearly 12 years together and Brad being investigated by the FBI for child abuse. But just in case you need a refresher, in 2016 Brad allegedly got into a drunken fight with Angelina (he was drunk; she was not) on the family’s private plane on the way home from France. An anonymous person then reported Brad to Los Angeles DCFS and claimed that Brad “attacked” their 15-year-old son Maddox during said fight. Apparently, Maddox jumped into the fight to verbally defend his mom when Brad “lunged at the boy.” Brad has vehemently denied hitting his son, though he does admit to being drunk and yelling at people. Since the incident, Brad has undergone a stint in rehab while Angelina has pushed for full custody of their kids in the divorce. Yikes. And to think I thought his low as a human being was when he copied his girlfriend Gwyneth’s haircut that one time, but it’s good to know I can still be proven wrong. 

Ed Westwick

Ed westwick

Chuck Bass is the reason I, a grown-ass woman in her late 20s, still consistently match with 23-year-olds in polo shirts on Hinge. So, it shocked me to find out that the man who plays a borderline sociopathic asshole who likes to intimidate and force himself upon unsuspecting women was allegedly, in real life, a borderline sociopathic asshole who likes to intimidate and force himself upon unsuspecting women. What is that saying about art imitating life? In 2018, actress Katrina Cohen came forward on Facebook and alleged that Westwick had raped her in 2015. In the Facebook post she says that the reason she didn’t come forward until after #MeToo was because she was persuaded into believing she was somehow complicit in her attack and that making accusations against the actor would kill her own career. No charges were ever filed due to “insufficient evidence” but the accusation itself is upsetting and troubling and reason enough for all of us to stop incorporating a whispered “I’m Chuck Bass” into foreplay (or is that just me?). Hey, Ed? You can go Chuck yourself now, mmkay?

Chris Soules

Chris Soules

Remember when the Bachelor was actually America’s most eligible man and not just a flaming piece of garbage masquerading as a very attractive human man? No? Me either. Chris Soules was the Bachelor back in 2014 but his most recent claim to fame is that he accidentally ran someone over—and killed him!—as a result of drinking and driving. Wow, do we think Becca Tilley is feeling blessed that she never received that final rose, or what? Chris, always the gentleman, took responsibility for his actions by evading charges at all costs. At one point his lawyers even claimed that the law he violated (leaving the scene of a hit and run) was actually unconstitutional because it, like, got him in trouble. Look, this is a thing I say when my barista f*cks up my order and puts three pumps instead of two pumps into my peppermint mocha, and in that instance, is totally valid. When it’s not valid? Manslaughter. Here’s hoping that in the new year he’s properly banished back to the Iowa cornfield from whence he crawled out of. 

Sadly, I’m sure there are many more Hollywood hotties who could have made this list, but truthfully I’m afraid if I include any more I’ll slip into another rage blackout and accidentally burn this entire world to the ground. Anyway, can’t wait to see what the new decade brings! Hopefully it’s a continuance of believing women and holding men accountable for their disgusting, damaging, and just, like, really illegal behavior. Cheers to the new year!!

Images: Shutterstock.com (5)

You Probably Forgot About Lindsay Lohan’s Iconic Sex List

It’s been a big year for Lindsay Lohan. She opened her beach clubs in Mykonos and Rhodes, and is supposed to be getting a new reality show sometime soon. I’m not sure whether I love her or hate her at this point, but I’m still fascinated no matter what. For the past few months, she’s basically just been hanging out in Mykonos, posing for pictures with famous people and randos that come to her club. Her mom came to visit, as did my favorite Trump child, Tiffany. But a few days ago, I saw a photo that really made me feel nostalgic. Lindsay was hanging out with Nico Tortorella, one of the names on Lindsay’s infamous “f*ck list.”

#nicotortorella #lindsaylohan #iconic

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If you don’t know about the f*ck list, prepare to have your mind blown. Back in 2014, Lindsay was staying at the Beverly Hilton Hotel with her friends. For reasons unknown, Lindsay filled out a literal Scattergories playing cards with 36 names of people, all of whom it’s assumed she slept with at some point. There are a few names that have always remained blurred out in the photos, but there’s still a ton of material here. Let’s walk down memory list, and check in on some of the greatest hits of Lindsay Lohan’s f*ck list.

Nico Tortorella

Nico Tortorella (who uses neutral pronouns) definitely isn’t the most famous person on the list, but they’re one of the most interesting. Also, they’re probably one of the few that she actually keeps in touch with. This is just a guess, but I’m pretty sure Zac Efron isn’t texting LiLo on the reg. Nico has been in lots of random TV shows and movies, but they’re best known for playing Josh on Younger. Nico is married to Bethany Meyers, and they’re both queer and hot and very into expressing themselves. Lindsay and Nico have been friends since at least 2011, and he even proposed to her as a joke one time. Glad they’re still friends—Lindsay needs some people in her life who aren’t Russian oligarchs.

us. them. @bethanycmeyers @magnushastings #magnushastings #gayface #truecolorsfund #affordableart #givingback #LGBTQIA #queerart #art #photography #magnushastingsphotography #queer #queervisibiity #strengthinnumbers

A post shared by nicotortorella (@nicotortorella) on

Jamie Dornan

I gotta say, Lindsay really got in early on this one. Way back in 2006, she and Jamie were rumored to have a fling, but it didn’t really lead anywhere. That was the same year that Jamie had his first movie role, and it was a full nine years before Fifty Shades of Grey came out. I’m pretty sure this means that Jamie Dornan owes his entire career to Lindsay Lohan? Maybe I just need to sleep with Lindsay too, and then my life will stop being a mess.

Justin Timberlake

I must admit, I had truly forgotten about this one. It’s wild to think back to a time when Lindsay Lohan and Justin Timberlake would have been at the same parties. It’s a little unclear exactly when and how this happened, but there is one plausible theory. In 2009, they were allegedly at the same club in New York, and then later Lindsay tweeted (then deleted) “where’s jb cheater?” Speculation is that “jb” could be Jessica Biel, and I’m just thoroughly confused. There’s a 99% chance JT has Lindsay’s number blocked.

Ashton Kutcher & Wilmer Valderrama

Hooking up with both of the hot guys from That ’70s Show is really a classic LiLo move. It’s a known fact that Lindsay dated Wilmer way back in 2004, when she was just 18 years old. Lindsay most likely got with Ashton in 2006, shortly before he started dating Demi Moore. That truly feels like a lifetime ago. Do we think Wilmer was mad at Ashton for sleeping with Lindsay? Bless this mess.

Orlando Bloom

The only known connection between Lindsay and Orlando is that they were both robbed by the Bling Ring. Wow, I really miss 2000s Hollywood. They were both robbed in the summer of 2009, and Lindsay was the last victim before they were arrested. At the time, Orlando was living with Miranda Kerr, but maybe he and Lindsay bonded over their lost stuff? Idk, they also could’ve had sex at literally any other time within the last 15 years. Fun fact: Orlando is a Buddhist, so I feel like he might vibe well with Lindsay’s spiritual energy.

Riley S/Riley G

One of the most random, not famous inclusions on Lindsay’s list is also a personal favorite of mine. The evidence points to this being Riley Giles, a snowboarder who Lindsay met in 2007 in rehab. They apparently dated for a while, and then Riley did some tell-all interviews after they broke up. Cute, I’m sure she appreciated it. Riley said that Lindsay “quit coke and got hooked on sex with me,” and I just threw up in my mouth a little. He called her a “nymphomaniac,” and said they escaped rehab and went to a mountain cabin, where they went at it “like rabbits.” Okay, I hate Riley.

Stavros Niarchos III

Ah yes, Stavros. He’s the heir to a massive shipping fortune, and naturally that’s always made him desirable boyfriend material. In the mid-2000s, he was dating Paris Hilton, and Lindsay allegedly tried to move in on Paris’ territory. It was always rumored that this was the reason Lindsay and Paris stopped being friends, even though Lindsay claimed that’s false. More recently, Stavros has been seeing Dasha Zhukova, which makes a lot of sense. Dasha is a Russian businesswoman who was previously married to Roman Abramovich, a Russian oligarch who’s worth $11 billion. Dasha is clearly good at following the money, and I applaud her. She and Stavros both have private Instagrams with less than 1,000 followers, which is a total power move.

All The Rest

There are a lot more famous names on the f*ck list, so we could be here for days. Highlights include Zac Efron (Lindsay spelled both his first and last name wrong), Joaquin Phoenix, Adam Levine, Heath Ledger, James Franco, and Benicio del Toro. Someday, I really hope Lindsay writes a book in which she explains each and every one of these encounters, but that would probably result in approximately 10,000 lawsuits. I’m also very curious to know who’s been added to the list since 2014, because I bet there are some really interesting artistic choices. Thanks for all the great memories Lindsay, please never change.

Images: @trackers88 / Instagram; @nicotortorella / Instagram; Giphy (2)

10 People Who Are Officially Cancelled in 2018

We’re not even a full week into February yet, and honestly, 2018 isn’t doing a stellar job at convincing anyone it plans to save us from the 365 days of hellfire that was 2017. A few good things actually did come out of 2017 though, like the #MeToo and Time’s Up movements. However, these movements wouldn’t be around in the first place if certain people didn’t act like total effing scumbags. There are seriously too many people to list, and I don’t have the time for that otherwise we’d be here all day, so here’s a shortlist to remind you who’s officially over and cancelled as we head into this new year reclaiming our time.

1. Harvey Weinstein

Do I really need to explain this one? The description for Time’s Up literally says it was formed in response to the “Weinstein Effect.” When you have your own “effect” named after you, it’s pretty safe to say you’re a monster of epic proportions and deserve to be cancelled indefinitely.

2. James Franco

Oh, James. Sometimes when a dude sorta looks like a creep, and talks like a creep, and smiles like a creep…he turns out to be a creep. Any professor who offers an instructional class on how to act in sex scenes should probably raise some red flags. Plus, we hear he’s allegedly a head pusher, and that is cool under absolutely no circumstance. The gag reflex is a delicate thing, and I will choose where I move my head when I damn well please. Next.

3. Matt Damon

Matt Damon is a classic case of “if you just kept your mouth shut, you wouldn’t be in this mess.” Honestly, if I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard that, I’d have enough money to buy more vodka and bring that problem full circle again. Damon tried to differentiate the “spectrum” of sexual assault, because apparently it’s important to keep it straight that whipping your dick out and rubbing one out to an unwilling audience is not the same thing as grabbing a handful of ass without consent. Both are disgusting, but it’s a different disgusting. Thank you for clearing that up, Matthew. He also said he was hoping more attention could be given to men who have not been accused of sexual misconduct in order to…IDK clear the reputation of men everywhere? The last thing we need is more attention on powerful men. Like, at all. How d’ya like them apples?

4. Louis C.K.

Speaking of unsolicited jerking off, we now turn to Louis C.K., a comedian whose jokes about non-consensual assault and masturbation actually turned out to be true. Wow, a man who tells the truth – in any other scenario he’d be given a pat on the back and a gold medal. But this is not one of those impressive displays of honesty, and even though he issued a half-assed apology, he and his overexposed fire crotch are still DOA. *Friends theme song clap*

5. Kevin Spacey

Did you forget about Mr. Spacey? That might be because he was literally erased from existence following the many accusations against him for forcing himself on young men – most notably one who was underage at the time. Then he tried to make it all ok by being like “but wait, I’ve been gay this whole time! Pls respect my bravery for coming out in this trying time.” Absolutely not. Being gay is not an excuse for anything other than choosing exclusively Whitney Houston songs at karaoke. Not only is Spacey himself cancelled, but he also fucked up the final season of House of Cards, and that is a crime against Netflix and humanity. President Robin Wright, please save us from this mess.

6. Quentin Tarantino

File this one under “shoulda seen it coming.” While allegations against Tarantino have not been of the sexual misconduct nature, they certainly fall in line with a powerful man abusing his position and personally inflicting or putting women in harm’s way. Uma Thurman spoke to the NY Times about the abuse she endured on the set of Kill Bill, including Tarantino spitting in her face and choking her with a chain to coax a more convincing acting performance, and purposefully endangering her by insisting she perform a stunt in a dangerous car that led to her crashing and permanently damaging her neck and knees. If karma serves him right, I have a feeling a bunch of women are about to metaphorically go all Kill Bill on his ass.

7. Ed Westwick

One word. Eight letters. Say it and you’re officially done. Predator. It really cuts deep when the subject of most of your teenage sexual fantasies turns out to be yet another link in the chain. Remember when Chuck Bass forced himself on Jenny Humphrey? Well you know what they say about art imitating life. You know you love me, XOXO Gossip Betch.

8. Arie Luyendyk Jr.

Alright so, Arie hasn’t actually done anything terrible (yet) so don’t freak out and condemn him. I’m just saying we should cancel him because like…have you been paying attention to this season of The Bachelor? He’s honestly pretty creepy and gross when he “flirts” while trying to kiss each and every girl’s entire face in one gulp, so I’m not counting him out on the “Time might be Up” list just yet. Don’t @ me. Just accept that he’s not Peter a slimy dude who broke up with his long term girlfriend to be the elderly Bachelor and join in my judgment if you know what’s good for you.

9. A Shit-ton Of Directors And Producers

One Tree Hill? Run by a sexual harasser. Creator of Mad Men? Misconduct allegations. Roman Polanski, James Toback, Brett Ratner, even the head of Disney Animation? You guessed it. IDK what it is about men who already get to boss people around as a job needing a little extra fix, but I can safely say I’m never setting foot near a film set because those things are clearly booby traps full of douchebags waiting to assault you at every turn. No thanks. You can go shave your back now.

10. Donald Trump

While he hasn’t been officially cancelled yet, what is the hold up, people?! The fact that the President of the United States has been accused of sexual assault by 19 different women, and reportedly paid off a porn star after he had an affair with her right after his wife gave birth. This should matter. Why does nothing matter?! Never did I think I would root so hard for evidence that our government colluded with Russia, but I’m afraid that might be our only hope. When the day comes that the country starts paying attention to removing predators from positions of political power, I’ll have a Pussy Hat and a Time’s Up pin waiting with your name on it.

The Biggest Snubs & Surprises From The Oscar 2018 Nominations

This morning, Hollywood woke up early to congratulate itself on another great year, and by that we mean the Oscar nominations were announced. It’s not a very surprising list this year, with most of the favorites from other awards shows showing up in force, but there are a few interesting choices to analyze. The actual Oscars are in March this year because of the Olympics, so you might actually have time to see a few of the movies, imagine that!

Surprise: Greta Gerwig

Let’s hear it for the LADIES!!! Greta Gerwig landed a nomination for directing Lady Bird, becoming just the fifth woman EVER to be nominated in this category. Lady Bird is amazing and Greta is very deserving, so this is only really a surprise because the Academy usually prefers, um, white dudes. Four for you Greta, you go Greta.

Snub: James Franco

After the super shocking revelation this month that James Franco is a fucking creep, it was unclear whether the voting period was late enough to stop him from getting an Oscar nomination for The Disaster Artist. He may have won the Golden Globe, but when it comes to the Oscars he’s officially canceled. Bye!!!

Surprise: ‘Darkest Hour’

Gary Oldman (aka Sirius Black) has been winning every major award for his performance as Winston Churchill, but Darkest Hour got a surprising invite to the Best Picture party. If you’re trying to watch all the nominated movies, sorry but you’re going to have to sit through two hours of World War II shit. We don’t make the rules here.

Snub: Tiffany Haddish

Tiffany Haddish was the surprise breakout star of the summer in Girls Trip, and she generated some modest awards buzz, but the Academy decided to go with five less surprising choices. Apparently even the best delivery of lines like “BOOTY HOLE” don’t win you an Oscar, go figure.

Surprise: Netflix

Netflix’s original movie Mudbound made a big splash, landing four nominations, including Supporting Actress for Mary J. Blige. Yeah, that’s right, Mary J. Blige can act, and you can witness it for yourself on Netflix without even leaving your bed. Rachel Morrison also became the first woman ever (!!!) to be nominated for Best Cinematography, so she deserves to get wasted on a Tuesday.

Snub-ish: Actors of Color

Remember a few years ago when the Academy failed to nominate any non-white actor for two fucking years in a row? Well, things have gotten a little better, but not good enough. This year, four out of 20 acting nominees are black, and the rest are white AF. We love Meryl Streep, but come on.

Surprise: ‘Get Out’

Get Out came away with four nominations, all in major categories: Best Picture, Actor, Director, and Original Screenplay. It deserved recognition, but still surprising that the Academy actually embraced a horror movie centered around black people that came out in February. Also let this sink in: two years ago, Jordan Peele was known as “the short one from Key & Peele.” Now he’s a double Oscar nominee.

Snub: ‘Fifty Shades Darker’

It’s just not fair at this point. What do Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey have to do to get a little respect around here? For the second movie in a row, they’ve been completely ignored by the Oscars. They have one more movie coming out next month, so we’ll keep our fingers crossed for a Best Picture nomination next year.

Surprise: ‘Beauty And The Beast’

Yeah I know it was only nominated for Costume Design and Production Design, but didn’t this movie come out at least three years ago? What year is it? Who am I?

Read the full list of nominees below.

Best picture
Call Me By Your Name
Darkest Hour
Dunkirk
Get Out
Lady Bird
Phantom Thread
The Post
The Shape Of Water
Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

Directing
Christopher Nolan (Dunkirk)
Jordan Peele (Get Out)
Greta Gerwig (Lady Bird)
Paul Thomas Anderson (Phantom Thread)
Guillermo Del Toro (The Shape Of Water)

Actress in a leading role
Sally Hawkins (The Shape Of Water)
Frances McDormand (Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri)
Margot Robbie (I, Tonya)
Saoirse Ronan (Lady Bird)
Meryl Streep (The Post)

Actor in a leading role
Timothée Chalamet (Call Me By Your Name)
Daniel Day-Lewis (Phantom Thread)
Daniel Kaluuya (Get Out)
Gary Oldman (Darkest Hour)
Denzel Washington (Roman J. Israel, Esq.)

Writing (original screenplay)
The Big Sick
Get Out
Lady Bird
The Shape Of Water
Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

Writing (adapted screenplay)
Call Me By Your Name
The Disaster Artist
Logan
Molly’s Game
Mudbound

Animated feature film
The Boss Baby
The Breadwinner
Coco
Ferdinand
Loving Vincent

Music (original song)
“Mighty River” (Mudbound)
“Mystery of Love” (Call Me By Your Name)
“Remember Me” (Coco)
“Stand Up for Something” (Marshall)
“This is Me” (The Greatest Showman)

Documentary (feature)
Abacus: Small Enough To Jail
Faces Places
Icarus
Last Men In Aleppo
Strong Island

Documentary (short subject)
Edith + Eddie
Heaven Is A Traffic Jam On The 405
Heroin(e)
Knife Skills
Traffic Stop
Foreign language film
A Fantastic Woman
The Insult
Loveless
On Body And Soul
The Square

Actor in a supporting role
Willem Dafoe (The Florida Project)
Woody Harrelson (Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri)
Richard Jenkins (The Shape Of Water)
Christopher Plummer (All The Money In The World)
Sam Rockwell (Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri)

Actress in a supporting role
Mary J. Blige (Mudbound)
Allison Janney (I, Tonya)
Lesley Manville (Phantom Thread)
Laurie Metcalf (Lady Bird)
Octavia Spencer (The Shape Of Water)

Makeup and hairstyling
Darkest Hour
Victoria & Abdul
Wonder
Film editing
Baby Driver
Dunkirk
I, Tonya
The Shape Of Water
Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

Visual effects
Blade Runner 2049
Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2
Kong: Skull Island
Star Wars: The Last Jedi
War For The Planet Of The Apes

Music (original score)
Dunkirk
Phantom Thread
The Shape Of Water
Star Wars: The Last Jedi
Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri

Short film (live action)
DeKalb Elementary
The Eleven O’Clock
My Nephew Emmett
The Silent Child
Watu Wote/All Of Us

Short film (animated)
Dear Basketball
Garden Party
Lou
Negative Space
Revolting Rhymes

Sound mixing
Baby Driver
Blade Runner 2049
Dunkirk
The Shape Of Water
Star Wars: The Last Jedi

Sound editing
Baby Driver
Blade Runner 2049
Dunkirk
The Shape Of Water
Star Wars: The Last Jedi

Costume design
Beauty And The Beast
Darkest Hour
Phantom Thread
The Shape Of Water
Victoria & Abdul
Cinematography
Blade Runner 2049
Darkest Hour
Dunkirk
Mudbound
The Shape Of Water

Production design
Beauty And The Beast
Blade Runner 2049
Darkest Hour
Dunkirk
The Shape Of Water

Turns Out James Franco Is Both Annoying And Creepy

It’s a new day in Hollywood, which means there are new accusations against a powerful Hollywood man. And surprise surprise, betches, that man is James Franco, someone who’s made me make this face:

For 10 years now. Following the Golden Globes, five women came forward being like, “SNATCH THAT TIME’S UP PIN OFF THIS ASSHOLE’S LAPEL, because he does not deserve to be wearing it.”

Franco, who’s like built a reputation on being sooo busy, found time to run an acting school called Studio 4 that had a class, amongst others, called Sex Scene Master Class. You’re allowed to pause, give that a huge side eye, and now continue reading. He allegedly abused his power dynamic as teacher by telling girls to take off their tops and would get angry when they wouldn’t. One woman who starred opposite him in a film claimed he majorly crossed the line when he removed her protective plastic genital shield during an orgy scene where he was simulating oral sex on her. So it sounds like Franco is exactly what he looks like? A creep.

Of course he is denying everything because that’s par for course with these types of ghoulish men. Stephen Colbert and Seth Meyers both were like, point blank, “are you a creep?” And he had the audacity to say he wasn’t, but if he was, he’d take responsibility for it. Biiiittcchhhh.

We all remember when he slid into a 17-year-old’s DMs on Instagram, asking her how old she was and where her hotel room was? When she was like, “honey I literally just got my drivers license, back off,” he did not back off and continued to digitally hover on her ‘gram. He obvs got caught doing that because he wasn’t slick enough to be doing any of this in the DMs and when he was called out, he claimed that “social media is tricky.” Honey, social media might be tricky, but being a pedophile isn’t,

So flush your Freaks & Geeks DVDs down the toilet, because we’re done with Franco. You can get your Busy Phillips fix from her Instagram stories. Or like, keep the DVDS, but have a frank converation with yourself about how worshipping the men in shows like this gives them the power to abuse for many years after the show is cancelled. Franco has lived up to his movie’s name and is truly a disaster artist. Bye.

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