Drink Smarter Not Harder With These Hangover-Free, Skinny Cocktails

Name one thing better than a sunny day, good company, and a perfectly crafted cocktail, I’ll wait. Now, name one thing worse than a hangover. And I’m not talking about a cutesy little headache that is instantly washed away with the hair of the dog. I’m talking about a full-body crisis that makes you reconsider your purpose on earth and stay in bed for 24 to 48 hours. If you have no idea what I’m talking about, then you’re either a) God’s favorite or b) under 30, but either way, sugary, high-calorie cocktails are simply not the vibe, especially in this economy.

Baby (it’s me, I’m baby) needs drinks that are delicious, efficient, and not going to make my life flash before my eyes the next time I fill out that survey at the doctor’s office with one too many questions about my recreational alcohol consumption. Don’t get me wrong, when I’m south of the border, anything goes. But for a casual Tuesday, I like my cocktails the way I like my McDonald’s French fries: skinny. Here’s a list of skinny cocktail recipes that won’t give you a hangover, for your next at-home happy hour.

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Hydrating Skinny Margarita

practical magic margarita scene

I wish I could take credit for this genius recipe, but it came to me like a mirage in the desert heat during Coachella. When I was told about a skinny marg, but with an electrolyte drink, I looked at the bartender like he’d asked me to run a marathon. Lo and behold, this was my favorite drink of the weekend.

⭐︎ 1.5 oz silver tequila (go for 21 Seeds Cucumber Jalapeño for extra kick)

⭐︎ 5 oz Electrolit cucumber lime flavor (make sure this is chilled ahead of time)

⭐︎ 1 0z lime juice

⭐︎ Tajin for rim

Skinny Espresso Martini

mary cosby espresso martini

The key to any martini is a chilled glass, so go ahead and wet your glass, stick it in the freezer, and let science do its work now! If you are a coffee head who prefers flavor over sweetness, this is the easy, three-step, hydrating Espresso Martini for you. The LMNT Chocolate Salt adds flavor and electrolytes for hangover mitigation.

⭐︎ 2 oz vodka (make sure this has been chilling for days, pls)

⭐︎ 1.5 oz of Trader Joe’s Instant Cold Brew Coffee, prepared

⭐︎ A teeny tiny splash of Trader Joe’s Brown Sugar Non-Dairy Oat Creamer

⭐︎ 1 pack of LMNT Chocolate Salt

Ranch Water

a simple favor cocktail

This ain’t Texas, but there ain’t no reason you can’t have a ranch water on a sunny day wherever TF you live. This drink is fab because while it’s heavy on the tequila, it’s also heavy on drinking a glass of water, which I forget to do half the time anyway. Yes, you should probs splurge for the Topo Chico for the full vibes, but I won’t hold you to it.

⭐︎ 3 oz. silver tequila

⭐︎ 1.5 oz lime juice (or more, to taste, if you’re like me)

⭐︎ 1 can of carbonated mineral water

Skinny Paloma

SATC Carrie cocktail

This Paloma recipe is healthy and a hangover fighter for multiple reasons. Firstly, the fibers in the grapefruit pulp (versus strained grapefruit juice) will help your stomach process the alcohol more slowly, provide more nutrients, and add a slushy texture! You can get grapefruit pulp in-store or chop and freeze a few yourself. Secondly, the ginger extract will work as an anti-inflammatory, AKA the chill pill your body needs while processing your delicious cocktail. Mix all ingredients together in a blender and drink with a straw!

⭐︎ 1.5 oz. silver tequila

⭐︎ 2 oz lime juice

⭐︎ 4 oz. Pamplemousse La Croix

⭐︎ 2 oz. frozen grapefruit pulp

⭐︎ A few drops of ginger root extract, to taste

Girly Summer Shandy

titanic drinking scenes

Shoutout to Big Beer for finally realizing low-calorie beers don’t have to be inferior. Technically, this recipe will work with any of your favorite summery, cal-friendly options, but I highly recommend Girl Beer (the Hurray’s one). It’s a brand I came across while killing time by hunting for samples in the grocery store that comes in multiple yummy but not overpowering flavors.

⭐︎ 6 oz. Pineapple Yuzu Girl Beer (or whatever flavor floats your boat)

⭐︎ 3 oz. lemon juice

⭐︎ 3 oz. water