Tom Schwartz

Hi friends!

Season 7 of Vanderpump Rules airs Monday at 9pm, an event I’ve been anticipating with a fervor my boyfriend some have described as “chilling.” I can’t help it.

Any hot betch knows that having perfect hair is crucial.

Just this week, I was thinking how sad I am that Vanderpump Rules is in its off season. (Yes, I have a rich and full life, don’t @ me.) Then, as if answering my prayers, Kristen Doute ‘Grammed something last night that required—nay, DEMANDED—my attention.

The most staged thing about Vanderpump Rules is how they expect us to believe that the cast members can plan these lavish vacations and weddings on a server’s budget.

This article required a lot of deep-diving into old Vanderpump Rules (ya welcome).

It’s no secret that sobriety plays a small role in Vanderpump Rules.