It would be an understatement to say that I am not impressed by Kyle Richards’ behavior as of late. I used to really like her—she was surprisingly down-to-earth, and I loved her relationship with Lisa Vanderpump and how much fun they would have. But I was super disappointed when she threw LVP under the bus, especially after what was going on with Lisa’s family. Like okay, you might be mad at her for something stupid, but if a friend is going through a major tragedy, you step the f*ck up for them. It really feels like the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills cast is so desperate for drama, they all just gang up on one person (usually the one they’re most jealous of) to bully them for ratings. I hope guys are real proud of yourselves for attacking Denise Richards, an actual celebrity, so people will watch your boring lives.
/rant.
But that’s not why we’re here. We’re here because Kyle Richards is not only spreading lies all over your screens, but all over her Instagram page.
Kyle posted this, which, I have to say, it makes me really annoyed that we’re in the middle of a pandemic and celebrities are traveling all over. Do your part, sit in your huge mansion, and shut the f*ck up about it. If I can quarantine in my 500-square-foot apartment, you can stay home. But even more annoyingly, this picture is full of lies and deceit.
Kyle is pretty fit, you can tell, but when I saw this photo my eyes immediately when to her abs. It looks like she just airbrushed abs onto her body…? Now, there did used to be a thing where celebrities would spray tan abs on themselves, and this looks a lot like that. But something about it is even more unnatural, whether she messed with the contrast and lighting on the image or actually drew it on (from the looks of it, in MS Paint). The part that was the real giveaway that something seems off to me was that her abs seem to be avoiding her bag’s straps! They are completely parallel. That is A SUPER strange coincidence.
While I could give the benefit of the doubt on the abs, what gives it away are the walls. (It’s always the walls.) Now, this pic was taken in a mirror. You can see that she wasn’t holding the phone perfectly straight because the lines of the mirror are crooked. So, because it’s off-kilter, the walls will also be angled. That’s totally fine. HOWEVER, the lines of the walls themselves should always be straight, just at a slight diagonal. Are you following me? The walls themselves will not have any kind of bend to them. If they’re diagonal, they will be a straight diagonal.
BUT THEY ARE NOT, particularly near her stomach (interesting).
You can see the wall on the far left is angled but consistently straight. However, the wall closest to Kyle starts off angled-but-straight, but then is stretched/dipped out near Kyle’s stomach, hip, and thigh. I also circled that weird parallel section of her abs artwork. It looks like her abs and her bag are trying to social distance. Why do celebrities always have weird visual issues only around their stomachs and thighs? Quite the coincidence, wouldn’t you say? Especially because if we look on the other side of Kyle’s stomach, we can see that the rings around the large vase/pot get messed up right there as well. This is a round object. The rings should go around all the way around. Instead, they get completely blurred/smushed under Kyle’s elbow, and the second ring falls down.
Yeah, sorry, I’m not buying it. I don’t get why anyone does this. Also, Kyle is clearly in great shape! Here’s a more realistic stomach post from a few years ago. This one doesn’t look edited to me, doesn’t have airbrushed abs, and looks almost the exact same. You’ll notice that while the walls are angled from another mirror selfie, they are totally straight.
Cannot express this enough: GOODBYE, KYLE.
What do you guys think of Kyle’s airbrushed abs? Do you think it’s a pointless edit too? What are your feelings on Kyle in general? Are you as over watching Kyle on RHOBH as I am? LMK!
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Images: John Tsiavis / Bravo; kylerichards18 / Instagram; Giphy
Congrats Tyler Cameron hive, because the TC drought is finally over. Recently, it was announced that Tyler would be making his return to TV with the new series Barkitecture, and yesterday, we got our first look at the show. From the trailer, we can see that pretty much all the initial Reddit tea about the show turned out to be correct, which checks out because we all know that Reddit is the best source for accurate journalism in 2020. And I have to say, Barkitecture looks just as ridiculous as the initial concept sounded. But also, I’m definitely going to watch it, because I have no life.
As you all probably know by now, the show follows Tyler Cameron and Delia Kenza as they design and build elaborate doghouses for people with a lot of extra money and nice backyards. Ugh, imagine having a yard. In the trailer, we finally get to see what some of these doghouses actually look like, and well, I now feel very poor. Here’s one example, complete with a sliding barn door, two windows, and a full outdoor play area to go along with it. I love the commitment to the farm theme, with a random wagon wheel, a horseshoe, and a stuffed cow and sheep that are definitely too big for a dog to play with. Inside, there are fake bales of hay and little saddles, which, again, I don’t know how the dogs would actually play with those. I think the thing to understand about this whole concept is that these doghouses are definitely just for the owners to flaunt their wealth. I’m pretty sure dogs don’t give a sh*t about the luxury finishes on their barn doors.
So, who are the guests on this show? The previous speculation about the show provided a few guesses, and while Neil Patrick Harris isn’t shown in the trailer, at least one of the guesses was spot-on. As the sleuths of Reddit had previously guessed, Real Housewives star Kyle Richards will be one of the guests on the show, which makes sense because she definitely has enough money to light $30k of it on fire.
The trailer gives us a good look at what Tyler and Delia built for Kyle’s dogs, and no one is surprised. It basically looks like the entryway of Kris Jenner’s house, complete with a black-and-white tile floor and a literal f*cking chandelier. Here’s a screenshot of Kyle Richards fitting comfortably inside the doghouse, while her dog is perched on some kind of couch that looks more expensive than any of my furniture. The dog has a plush wine bottle in its mouth, while Kyle is holding a plush rosé bottle.
So obviously the doghouses on the show are going to be insane, but we already knew that. I’m dying to know how much these projects actually cost—I guess because I’m in the mood to feel bad about myself. Like, these definitely cost more than I make in a year, but it’s fine, I’m fine, everything is fine. Kyle Richards, hope your dogs enjoy their chandelier, it’s what they deserve.
Wait okay, I don’t feel broke enough yet, let’s look at one more. Here’s an ultra-modern take on a doghouse. Take it in, take it all in. Yes, it’s two stories. Yes, there are spherical windows. Yes, those hardwood floors look nicer than anything in my apartment. Yes, it looks like one of the expensive futuristic houses you’d work towards in the LIFE game. Nope, I am NOT MAD about it! I hope this dog is happy, because it’s literally part of the 1%. Must be nice.
The thing I’m still most interested to see is how Tyler does hosting his own show, because I think we forget that until now, we’ve only seen him on TV as a contestant on The Bachelorette. Yeah, everyone loved him, but showing up for a group date every three days and not making an ass of yourself is a lot different than carrying an entire show. I’ve met him, and he was charming AF, so I have a feeling he’ll do a good job. The teaser trailer doesn’t really give us much of a look at Tyler or his vibe with Delia, so I guess we’ll have to wait and see.
We don’t have an exact premiere date for Barkitecture yet, but the trailer says it’s coming in April, so the wait is almost over. Here’s the full teaser trailer for the show, which you already know you’re going to binge the day it comes out:
Images: Presley Ann/WireImage via Getty Images; Quibi / YouTube
This season of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills has been slightly less of a snoozefest more dramatic than seasons past. For nine episodes (and counting) viewers have been following the saga of an adopted dog named Lucy Lucy Apple Juice (I wish I were kidding. Also, why is it not Juicy?) who mysteriously ended up at a shelter. Those who don’t watch the show (how dare you) may have seen references on social media to #puppygate and, most recently, the Goodbye Kyle Challenge and wondered WTF is going on. Because I’m such a good friend, I’m here to break down the dog drama for you and explain why I’m on Team LVP and you should be too.
The Controversy
Dorit explains at the beginning of the season that she adopted a dog from Vanderpump Dogs, an organization founded by, you guessed it, Lisa Vanderpump, aka LVP. Because the dog bit Dorit’s husband and children, she decided to give the dog to a “biz associate” who “fell in love with” Lucy according to a tweet from Dorit on February 27th.
I should’ve . When we contemplated giving Lucy back to VD a biz associate came to our home and Lucy and she fell in love with one another. I believed we were doing the right thing and I called Lisa V to tell her. I wish Lisa had just asked me to bring Lucy back at that point. https://t.co/0C9Rg94Atl
— Dorit Kemsley (@doritkemsley1) February 27, 2019
Seems reasonable enough. However, for reasons that are still unclear, Lucy was taken to a shelter and the shelter contacted LVP after scanning Lucy’s microchip. Teddi claims that she was involved in a plot, orchestrated by LVP and her employees, to expose this on camera and make Dorit look bad, an accusation LVP vehemently denies. Dorit and LVP, who have been friends for years through their husbands, seemed to patch things up at the beginning of this season.
This all changes when Dorit discovers an unflattering article about her and the Lucy situation published on Radar Online. Dorit and the rest of the cast believe that LVP was behind the article and the entire #puppygate storyline. When Kyle goes to LVP’s house to let her know this, things quickly get heated and Kyle is summarily kicked out of LVP’s house. We hear Ken, LVP’s husband, chillingly bellow “GOODBYYYYE KYYYYLE!” off-camera, launching a viral challenge on social media that is currently curing my rosacea. Even Kris Jenner is getting in on the fun. Do I need a hobby? Why yes, yes I do.
LVP’s Role
This is far from the first time that LVP has been accused of manipulating people behind the scenes. As early as season 2, Adrienne Maloof accused LVP of selling stories to Radar Online. Camille has also alleged that her explosive revelation about Taylor Armstrong’s abusive marriage that same season were encouraged by LVP. Brandi Glanville has maintained that LVP manipulated her throughout her stint on the show, instructing Brandi to reveal that Adrienne’s children were carried by a surrogate in season 3, and in season 4 coaxing Brandi to bring magazines alleging trouble in Kyle’s marriage on a cast trip to provoke Kyle. Lisa Rinna has said that it was LVP who was responsible for the entire controversy in season 6 centering on whether Yolanda Hadid really did have Lyme Disease by having Rinna suggest that Yolanda was actually suffering from Munchausen Syndrome instead.
LVP has consistently denied any involvement in these controversies, but the sheer number of these instances and similar fact patterns are, at best, highly suspicious if not totally damning. Even Kyle, her frenemy good friend, has compared being friends with LVP to “playing chess with Bobby Fischer.” Although the owner of Radar Online has said LVP is not a source for the website, it’s hard to believe LVP had nothing to do with the story getting out there.
The Divide
In appearances leading up to this season’s premiere, it’s been clear to viewers that there is a major rift between LVP and the rest of the cast and that the narrative was going to focus on LVP’s alleged misdeeds and her long-awaited comeuppance. But even if LVP is guilty of everything she has been accused of, I find myself still taking her side, something I’m not sure the other ladies or Bravo counted on when crafting the narrative arc this season. We learn early on in the season that LVP’s brother committed suicide just months before shooting began. While grief is not a valid excuse for bad behavior (a concept that Lala on Vanderpump Rules continually fails to grasp this season), it does give LVP more humanity than we’ve seen from her in previous seasons where she has maintained the proverbial stiff upper lip. For the rest of the cast to choose this time in LVP’s life to gang up on her is especially gross. I may have been able to get on board with a takedown on another season, but with all she is going through now the pile-on is backfiring.
It’s also hard to get behind Dorit when she is far from a reliable source. We can’t forget that this isn’t the first dog she adopted from Vanderpump Dogs. I can believe that a first dog didn’t work for her family, but to give up a second dog for the same reason looks a bit more suspicious. Even if we believe her, she was more than familiar with the protocol the second time around (or should have been). I know she didn’t want to pay the $5,000 penalty because she doesn’t have it didn’t read the contract carefully (if at all), but giving the dog to a business associate she can’t completely vouch for, rather than return the dog to the safe place it came from run by a vocal advocate for animal welfare, is convoluted and shady. In other words, totally on brand for her.
What Happens Now?
It’s unclear whether or not LVP will be back for season 10, though her rift with the other ladies makes it unlikely. But what is this show without her? Almost all of the memorable moments on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills are the result of storylines that she (allegedly) orchestrated. Without LVP, what would we be left with—Kyle gallivanting around town with the rest of the gang in an unfortunate hat and/or muumuu and laughing at her own corny jokes? Dorit dressing like an extra on Star Trek and calling it fashion?
While it was a slight improvement to see Teddi get in the mix more this season, she remains boring and unlikeable, especially with her hypocritical inability to hold herself “accountable” until it was clear she was going to be set up this season. And no matter how hard she tries, being on time and working out do not a personality make. Erika hasn’t given us much since at least two seasons ago, and Rinna is at her best when she has a worthy opponent. Denise is a breath of fresh air, but still too new and likely can’t carry a show if her ex-husband needs to be mentioned every episode.
Ironically, some of the realest stories could come from Dorit, but she wouldn’t know authenticity if it was a Gucci jumpsuit ravaged by Gs giving her a rash. With her phony accent and tacky fashion choices meant to flaunt her wealth, her entire persona is a façade, but no one seems to confront her about it on the show. Her husband’s gambling debts are mounting and she was actually reportedly confronted in the Bahamas on a cast trip by someone about the six-figure debt she and her husband owe for her swim line that she promoted endlessly last season. But sure, let’s keep harping on a dog (who is fine, btw) and watching Dorit parade around in at least four loud designer labels at a time and say it’s a show. I guess calling out someone on their questionable finances is only okay on The Real Housewives of Atlanta, but that’s a subject for another article. The point is, until these women get real about the important sh*t going on in their lives, however unflattering, we need someone like LVP to stir the pot and give us something to watch. Otherwise, we’d look like this all season:
Images: Bravo; Giphy; doritkemsley1 / Twitter; twojudgeygirls / Instagram
It just might be the end of an era. Rumors about Lisa Vanderpump leaving Real Housewives of Beverly Hills have been swirling for months, but now it seems like it’s actually happening. On Tuesday, sources told E! News that LVP is really done with the show, and that she’ll be leaving the cast after the upcoming ninth season. If you’ve been watching RHOBH until now, it’s no secret that Lisa has been kind of over it the last couple years, and she definitely doesn’t bring the drama like she used to. Still, it’s a big deal that one of the OGs will reportedly be making her exit, so let’s go over some of the most important points.
For the past few months, the Beverly Hills ladies have been in high gear filming the new season. They’ve been pretty open about posting photos together at filming events, and Lisa Vanderpump has been absent from most of them. She definitely showed up to some things early on, but a production source tells E! that “Lisa has only filmed on a few occasions during the beginning of filming this season, and has been absent the remainder of the time.” Currently, all the ladies (except Denise Richards, who is at home dealing with the wildfires) are in France filming what is presumably their big end of season trip, and Lisa V. is nowhere to be found.
Here’s the French gang, complete with Lisa Rinna in a classic leopard coat, and Erika Jayne in a Fendi puffer coat that I need right now:
Honestly, they all look amazing. I’m excited for this season, even if it’s boring AF like the last one. But in more important (and more shady) Instagram news, Kyle Richards had the absolute best response to a commenter asking about the whereabouts of LVP. Thanks @cbcbravo, you make my life complete.
No doubt the other ladies are all sick of being asked about Lisa Vanderpump leaving Real Housewives, what she is doing, or why she’s not at filming. According to the source, on the few occasions Lisa has shown up to film, “her interactions with the ladies have been solely negative.” Lisa has always been a bit of a princess about things going her way, but she usually has at least one ally, or someone who she can boss around (recently Dorit, formerly Brandi Glanville). It really seems like LVP is on the outs for good this time.
So what does Lisa Vanderpump leaving Real Housewives mean for RHOBH, and especially for Vanderpump Rules? It looks like Lisa will at least be on parts of this season of RHOBH, but it’s unclear whether she’ll remain a full-fledged Housewife, or be demoted to “friend of.” I don’t know how all those contracts work, but I’d imagine part of being a Real Housewife is actually showing up to film the show. I don’t have a law degree, that’s just a guess. In terms of VPR, I’m guessing not that much will change. The new season is already filmed, and also Lisa has way more personal interest in that show’s success. Maybe she’ll make fewer on-camera appearances, but I’m sure she’ll still get in everyone’s business and treat Kristen like dirt. Some things never change.
So for now, we’ll wait for some sort of official confirmation about Lisa Vanderpump’s future on Bravo, but until then, I’m going to rewatch old episodes and reminisce on all the times she tried to act like Brandi wasn’t the devil, or treated her son Max like the hired help. Let’s hope Denise Richards and the other returning ladies are ready to bring the drama this season, or else we’re really in trouble.
Images: @doritkemsley / Instagram; @cbcbravo / Instagram
Is there anything better than a celebrity family? While I love talking sh*t about all celebrities equally, there’s something about an added family dynamic that just makes everything messier, and a lot more fun. Obviously kids deserve privacy and blah blah blah, but everyone on this list is over the age of 18, and therefore fair game to roast. When thinking about my favorite famous families, there are some obvious choices, but there are also some underrated ones that don’t get enough appreciation for the drama they bring into our lives. I ranked the best famous families by messiness, so you’re welcome.
The Hadids
No one really knew or cared about the Hadids until a few years back, but times have changed. Gigi and Bella are both major stars now, and their little brother Anwar is quickly following in their footsteps. Add to that their mom Yolanda’s tenure on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, and there’s plenty to talk about. The main thing to know about Yolanda is that she had Lyme disease for years, and Lisa Rinna accused her of faking it. It was a whole thing, but back to the kids. After years of on and off dating, it looks like Bella is officially back with The Weeknd, which feels correct. Gigi dated Zayn Malik for a long time before breaking up this year, and Anwar is now rumored to be seeing Kendall Jenner, which almost feels like incest? Their dad, Mohamed Hadid, is a real estate developer worth hundreds of millions, and he’s also best friends with Lisa Vanderpump.
The Simpsons
It’s easy to forget how big of a deal Jessica Simpson was in the early 2000s. Her little sister, Ashlee, was also a pretty big deal for a while, with her own reality show and a hit album, until her career was ruined by a lip-syncing scandal on Saturday Night Live. Ah, times were so simple in 2004. Ashlee is now married to Evan Ross (Diana Ross’ son), and they have a new reality show together, which I am very much not watching. But let’s not forget that Jessica was the first Simpson to have a reality show with her husband. Jessica’s reality show with her then-husband Nick Lachey is really wild to revisit now, because Jessica was just so dumb. The best moment is when she is shook by the realization that buffalo wings are not made of buffalo meat (but it’s a very close second to the time she thought Chicken of the Sea was made of chicken). Jessica and Ashlee are the famous ones, but the Simpson family wouldn’t be complete without their dad Joe. If you’re wondering about Joe Simpson, think of him as a prototype for Kris Jenner, which makes him a…dadager? Idk.
The Cyruses
Even though Billy Ray Cyrus is famous, I firmly believe that Miley has been in charge of this family since she was like, 12 years old. She started making that Disney money, and the rest is history. Now, over a decade later, Miley has gone through major transformations in her career, from Disney starlet to horny teen to horny adult baby to hippie stoner. I might have missed some steps in there, but you get the gist. Miley now seems pretty chill, and is still engaged to Liam Hemsworth, whose famous family has had much less drama. These days, the most interesting member of the family is Miley’s little sister Noah, who you know from her iconic (but short-lived) relationship with Lil Xan.
The Hiltons & Richards
This family often gets forgotten, because Paris Hilton is the only one who really matters here. Paris is one of my favorite people of all time, whether she’s making a fool of herself on The Simple Life or pretending to DJ at nightclubs around the world. She’s an icon, the leader of a business empire, and the epitome of a betch. Also, her sister Nicky married into one of the most famous families in Europe, the Rothschilds, and I am very jealous. But it’s important not to forget that Paris and Nicky’s aunts are none other than Kim and Kyle Richards, the messy duo from The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. The drama between the sisters has been a main plot line on the show for years, and their sister Kathy (Paris’ mom) is so above it. For months, both Kim and Kathy weren’t speaking to Kyle, because she decided to produce a TV show based on their life story. The show, American Woman, got canceled after one season, so was it even worth it?
The Kardashians & Jenners
For our generation, the Kardashian-Jenners are the holy grail of famous families. In the past, we had families where multiple generations were Oscar winners or Broadway stars, but I like the Kardashians just as much. I won’t bore you with all the details that you already know, but it’s really spectacular to think about all this family has given us in the last decade. A 72-day marriage. Secret pregnancies. Cheating scandals. Jail time. Lip kits. And don’t forget, it all started with a sex tape. All these other families can try, but no one has ever brought the drama at a level that approaches the Kardashians. The devil works hard, but Kris Jenner truly just works harder.
The Trumps
Look, I know we all hate Donald Trump, and therefore we hate most of his family just by association, but there’s just so much material here. Ivanka paints herself as this iconic businesswoman and champion of feminism, but really her greatest achievement is a clothing line known for making designer knock-offs, which subsequently got dropped from most stores. Then we have Donald Jr. and Eric, who basically do nothing but wear suits and follow their dad around. Oh, and Don Jr. also allegedly had an iconic affair with Aubrey O’Day of Danity Kane, who appeared on The Celebrity Apprentice. I could go in on Melania, but I’ve been done with her since the moment she plagiarized Michelle Obama’s speech at the GOP convention in 2016. My personal favorite Trump is Tiffany, the daughter that DJT basically didn’t acknowledge until he was running for office. While Ivanka is busy fighting for women’s rights (lol), Tiff spent her summer at Lindsay Lohan’s club in Mykonos, so she’s winning. Ha ha ha how tf did we let these people control our country?
Images: @yolanda.hadid , @krisjenner, @tishcyrus, @kylerichards18, @jessicasimpson, @donaldjtrumpjr / Instagram