Last-Minute Father’s Day Gifts Because We Know You Forgot Too

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Let’s be honest, we all waited until the last minute to find a Father’s Day gift. We’re all just trying to stay in the present, ok? Speaking of presents… All I have to say is thank goodness for expedited shipping or my ass would be in trouble right about now. It looks like we’re on the same page since you’re reading this article, so we’ve taken the liberty of rounding up all the best Father’s Day gifts on Amazon Prime for you. (You can thank us later.)

Buy $29.99
price as of time of posting

I don’t know why, but I feel like if there’s something smoked on a cocktail menu, the dad at the table is bound to order it. Bring the buzz home with this cocktail smoker kit. Did I mention there are 4 different kinds of wood to burn?

Buy $48
price as of time of posting

Because we know he’d be a mess without you, help your partner (or dad) get organized with this bedside docking station. It has a perfect little nook or hook for everything he uses on a day-to-day basis. Bonus points: he’ll never have to ask you, “Hey, where’s my wallet?” again.

You know what they say, “If you teach a man to fish…” Well, if you get him a breakfast sandwich maker he’ll have fresh breakfast for life. Plus, what Dad doesn’t love a good BEC?

Buy $84.99
price as of time of posting

Okay, so maybe he’s not up for a trip to the spa, but that doesn’t mean you can’t bring the spa to him. This foot and leg massager is quiet and super effective. It’s the perfect gift to show you care without actually having to touch his feet.   

Buy $75.99
price as of time of posting

Nothing quite says “Dad” like grilling. This 19-piece grill set is all he’ll ever need when mastering the BBQ. It’s made from quality material and has a portable carrying case so he can show it off to all his friends.

Buy $59.99
price as of time of posting

For the active Dad who’s always on-the-go, the Amazon Halo tracker is the perfect addition to his ensemble. It’ll track his steps, sleep, and heart rate without being intrusive or distracting.

Not only is this speaker portable, but it’s also wireless and waterproof—making it a perfect addition to your next family beach day. What more could he ask for?

The father of your children might need some peace and quiet every once in a while, and these noise canceling headphones will do the trick. If he starts telling too many Dad jokes, you can always borrow them to tune him out.

I know we talked about grilling already, but what if it’s raining on his BBQ parade? Or, you don’t have outdoor space for a grill? Not to fret—this indoor grill has you covered. It’s non-stick and dishwasher safe, which means no extra dishes for you to deal with.

Give him the gift of a green thumb all year long. Dads that love being on garden duty during the warmer months will love having an indoor version of it for every season.

Let him relax a little—setting up this hammock in your backyard will make him feel like he’s on an island somewhere without you having to fork over the funds for flights. 

Buy $27.99
price as of time of posting

Cure his caffeine fix during the hot summer mornings with a cold brew coffee maker. He’ll stop complaining about his hot coffee being too watery when he adds too many ice cubes to it. 

Buy $62.99
price as of time of posting

Let’s get to the point, pickleball is having a moment. It’s a great game to play with the entire family. Just make sure he doesn’t get too competitive.

OK, anything with the phrase “industrial strength” in the name has to be made specifically for fathers, right? We all know that he’s probably never going to buy this for himself, but he desperately needs it. 

Let him be the “cool” Dad he thinks he is with a leakproof, soft cooler backpack. Perfect for all the summer picnics, beach days, and boys’ nights ahead. 

Image: Cottonbro / Pexels

How To Ask For Money Instead of Gifts This Holiday Season

If you’ve ever read a story by yours truly, you know that the holidays give me all the life I’ll ever need. Even now, as a 26-year-old jaded New Yorker who is impressed by nothing, I tear open a perfectly-wrapped gift with the same energy that most people save for fighting strangers at Target on Black Friday. However, sometimes I’ll rip off the wrapping paper, lift the cardboard lid, and find a disappointing gift. Honestly, the last time I got excited over a gift that came in a box was in 2004, and guess what was in the box? A puppy.

Unless you’re gifting someone the eternal happiness that comes with a dog, wrapped gifts just aren’t as exciting as they used to be. Maybe it’s just a downside of being an adult, but my favorite kind of gift is a monetary one. Like, want to give me a gift I’ll truly cherish? Pay for my gym membership for a month! Just kidding, but like, not really. If all you and your loved ones want for Christmas is some cheddar, listen up, because etiquette expert Elaine Swann will clue you in how to give money as a gift seeming like you put zero thought into your present, and on the flip side, how to ask for money without looking like an entitled douchecanoe.

The only time I’ve ever witnessed people asking for money instead of presents was at my brother and his wife’s wedding. Yes, you read that right. These two asked their guests to donate to a honeymoon fund instead of losing their sanity on a wedding registry. At first, I thought it was the tackiest thing I’d ever heard, but then I saw the photos of them gallivanting around the Ritz in Paris and realized they didn’t drop a damn cent on this. And that’s when I realized that asking for money in lieu of gifts is, honestly, the move.

So if you’re just looking to give cash this holiday season, Swann suggests, “Make sure you personalize this gift. Give some thought to how this person may use the money. Then, in the note, you can add in a line about something that is a hobby of theirs or something they may enjoy doing with the money.” So, for example, if you’re giving me money, tell me a little tale about a thirsty girl who’s strapped for cash and loves white wine. Cute, right?

If you’ve been raised to exhibit classiness in your day-to-day life and don’t want to stop now by asking for money, worry not because there are ways to do it without looking like Mona Lisa Saperstein.

Swann says, “Be honest! Let them know that you have your heart set on a ski trip, a spa treatment, paying off your student loans, or any other kind of experience you’re interested in. By stating this, you can encourage them to give the gift of money that can go toward this experience.” For an added bonus, she advises, “Keep it towards an experience that people can see and feel a part of when you share stories or photos through social media.” Because the only thing better than seeing the look on someone’s face when they open a gift is being publicly thanked (and tagged) on Instagram stories once they actually use your gift.

Look, if anyone is actually giving you a holiday gift, chances are they know you pretty well, so they’re not going to judge you for asking for money (they probably know you well enough to judge you for your choice in exes/Seamless orders/generally destructive life choices instead). 

If you do want money, don’t wring out your generous friends by asking for a fortune. That’s actually why putting this money towards something specific, like a trip or a facial, is the way to go, and it will actually give them an idea of how much they should give you without you having to awkwardly name a number. At the end of the day, everyone loves getting money as a present! I’ve never heard any of my rich friends who work in finance or advertising open an envelope of cash and be like, “Ugh, I wish it was bath salts!” So, if you love your friends and family, get them something they really want, like a crisp Benjamin. 

Images: NBC; Giphy (2)

The Betches 2019 Gift Guide: $150+

If the proliferation of Christmas music through my eardrums is any indication, it’s holiday season. That means it’s the one time of year when you have to think about other people and not just yourself (bummer). However, as a conceited person, I’ll say that there is no rush quite like the influx of praise you receive from buying someone the perfect gift. But that is hard to do, so I’ve rounded up some gifts that will get you those compliments you so badly need, organized by price point. Whether you’re ballin’ on a budget or straight ballin’ you can find something on this list.

On this list, you’ll find luxe gift options for all the people you really feel like you need to splurge on. For gifts that won’t hurt your wallet so badly, check out our other Gift Guides, with options under $50 and under $150.

Onepiece Holidays Are Coming Onesie, $160

F*ck an Ugly Christmas Sweater, an Ugly (but not actually ugly) Christmas Onesie is so much better. This has a hood, pockets (you know a bitch loves pockets), suede sleeve and elbow patches, and a two-way zipper closure (meaning, you don’t have to get completely naked to pee). This is the kind of gift that you get for your bf, but really, you get it so you can steal it… if he’ll let you once he feels how f*cking cozy it is.

Drinkworks® Home Bar by Keurig®, $199

The chances you actually want to leave your house to get a cocktail in the winter are basically slim to none. However, I know there is no shot in hell I’d be able to make myself a cocktail I actually would enjoy drinking at home so this is where I run into a problem. But we have found the solution to that with the Drinkworks® Home Bar by Keurig®, which is exactly what it sounds like. Now you can make cocktails from the comfort of your own home without knowing a thing about mixology. The liquid-filled pods that you put in the machine come with all the ingredients already in it so you just have to stick it in the machine and voilà – a craft cocktail!

La Mer The Replenishing Moisture Collection, $245

La Mer is the sh*t, and even though it’s pricy AF, it’s worth the money. This three-piece mini regimen includes the Replenishing Oil Exfoliator, Moisturizing Soft Cream, and Renewal Oil, plus a chic little carrying case that you can definitely use as your go-to travel beauty case once you’ve gone through all the La Mer products.

Apple AirPods Pro, $249

Yeah, we getting bougie bougie in this section. To be honest, these kind of look like the sh*tty Skull Candy in-ear headphones I used to buy from Sam Goody, only without cords. But we as a society have decided AirPods are aspirational, so here they are on this list. You can get these engraved for free, which really ups the gift factor.

George The Jeweler Custom Name Necklace in 14K Gold, $259.99

Nameplate necklaces, so hot right now. Don’t just get a crappy one from Forever21, get a real, 14K gold, customizable nameplate necklace from the Kardashians’ jeweler. You can get it in yellow, white, or the still-somehow-trendy rose gold. I have one of these, and it’s legit my favorite thing.

Hale Bob Unity Lace Dress, $274

I feel like this dress is something one of the witches in AHS Coven would have worn when they were testing to see who the next Supreme would be, and I mean that in the best way because I honestly want it rn. And if you haven’t heard of the designer yet, pay attention, because Hale Bob has been featured in the likes of Vogue and Elle (and now, Betches!) and been worn by celebs like Jenna Dewan and Cheryl Burke.

MZ Wallace Travel Jim, $295

This bag is perfect for holding all the sh*t you need to travel with, or take to the gym, but it’s still lightweight. It comes in a number of cute colors and patterns, including the oh-so-trendy camo. (It’s also important to note that it isn’t an obnoxious camo.) Anyway, I feel like everyone needs a solid weekend bag, and this one from MZ Wallace is that bag.

Connex Frequent Flyer Hardside, $299

Before you come at me for this one, let me just say that all the luggage I’ve ever owned in my life has been a gift from my mom. So, this holiday season, maybe return the favor? This luggage is made by the same people as Swiss Army Knives, and is seriously legit. It’s got built-in space-saving features, plus a USB port, SIM card replacement tool, ID tag, and pen. 

Harrys of London Grace Nappa Sneakers, $425

I’ve participated in enough wedding gift giving that the thought of giving my college friend a crock pot infuriates me. I helped that girl do her first keg stand and now I’m supposed to act as if she’s some delicate homemaker? Chances are she’s going to want a pair of fancy AF shoes to change into at her wedding and these sneakers are the perfect gift to give as a group. So hit up those other bridesmaids and split the cost of this pricey but comfortable sneaker. Give the gift early enough and she’ll have these for her bachelorette party too. And you know she’ll be living in these on her honeymoon.

 

 

Betches may receive a portion of revenue if you click a link and purchase a product or service. The links are independently placed and do not influence editorial content.

The Betches 2019 Gift Guide: $50-$150

If the proliferation of Christmas music through my eardrums is any indication, it’s holiday season. That means it’s the one time of year when you have to think about other people and not just yourself (bummer). However, as a conceited person, I’ll say that there is no rush quite like the influx of praise you receive from buying someone the perfect gift. But that is hard to do, so I’ve rounded up some gifts that will get you those compliments you so badly need, organized by price point. Whether you’re ballin’ on a budget or straight ballin’ you can find something on this list.

Here are our best picks this holiday season between $50 and $150. For gift ideas that are a little more expensive or a little less expensive, check out our other two 2019 Gift Guides.

Pottery Barn Black Marble Wine Cooler, $59

I feel like when you get a wine cooler, you’ll know you’ve made it. Like, yeah, I need to cool my $12 wine, what about it? It’s imported and made of 100% marble, which just sounds fancy af. There’s also a white marble version if you’re not into the black… but like, if you don’t prefer black, who tf are you?

Vineyard Vines Holiday Pajama Pants, $65

If your boyfriend is still going to sleep in boxers that have holes in them, get him a pair of decent pajama pants, for god’s sake. They’re super soft, made of cotton, and come in a couple of festive patterns. They also come in a simple dark blue and green plaid if the recipient in question is allergic to patterns that are not a neutral.

BFFS & BABES Pastel Party Tie-Dye Cotton Fleece Pullover Sweatshirt, $68

Because all the fads you loved in the 90s but have since thrown out are BACK, tie-dye is in, so get you and your BFF a matching custom tie-dye sweatshirt. All BFFS & BABES sweatshirts are hand dyed and made to order, so you won’t have to worry about any gift overlap.

as|if by Nassif #FRESHSTART Regimen, $89

Composed of a #getwoke exfoliating cleanser and mask, #areweclear skin refining essence, and #youfeelme hydrocream moisturizer, this kit will seriously improve skin—but the names are so cute, it won’t seem like a backhanded gift. Plus, this sh*t really works, and smells amazing.

Brooklinen Super-Plush Robe, from $98

It’s hermiting weather, and what piece of attire is more perfect for that than a super-plush robe made of Turkish cotton? What about a super-plush robe made of Turkish cotton WITH POCKETS for your snacks?! Ya love to see it.

Fitbit Inspire HR, $99.95

For those of you who might poo-poo this idea, I literally gave my mom a Fitbit years ago, and she’s worn it every day ever since. I feel like there’s nothing worse than spending money on a gift for someone, and having them never use it. 

The Ruffino Prosecco Holiday Six-Pack, $100

This collab between Italian wine producer Ruffino and Brooklyn-based fashion designer Stickybaby is billed as “the ultimate gift for the Prosecco lover in your life,” but I think you should cut out anyone you know who doesn’t like Prosecco. Included are six mini Prosecco bottles and a transparent glitter tote—clear bags, so hot right now. Between the bag and the Prosecco, it’s a two-in-one gift.

Slip BEAUTY SLEEP TO GO! PINK TRAVEL SET, $119

I’m a skeptic about most things in life, so please trust me when I say that using a silk pillowcase has actually changed my life. And by life, I mean skin and hair, mostly. You know when you get a blowout and you spend two hours trying to devise a way to sleep that won’t f*ck it up? Yeah, you don’t have to do that anymore if you have a silk pillowcase. This travel set comes with a pillowcase and a sleep mask, and it also comes in—you guessed it—black.

Olivia Burton Eco Vegan-Friendly Midi Dial Watch, $120

I am decidedly extra, hence why I’m obsessed with the rose gold. This water-resistant watch has a vegan leather strap that’s made from 100% recycled materials, so you can feel good about giving it to someone. You can also personalize the band to make it that much more special. 

Onzie Black Rib Yoga Set, $126

These leggings are so cute, so comfortable, and if you wanted to buy them individually and not as a set, the $72 price tag is not terrible. Plus, as someone with wide hips and no waist, the M/L fit perfectly—no muffin top, and they’re not sliding down either. 

Briogeo Rose Quartz Crystal Energy Comb, $128

Look, am I the type of person who would drop a Benjamin (and then some) on a comb? No, but I also don’t believe in crystals, and I feel like the same type of person would appreciate this gift. According to the Briogeo website, rose quartz is “is a symbol of loving energy that clears away negativity.” So if you detangle your locks with it, you can “Comb away the day’s stress and tension to rebalance and restore your scalp and hair harmony.” At the very least, it looks pretty.

Man Crates Whiskey Appreciation Crate, $129

Yeah yeah, it’s a little gender-normative, but you can give this crate to anyone who’s into whiskey, regardless of gender. The crate includes a personalized hand-made whiskey decanter, 2 personalized Heavy Bottom Rocks Glasses, 2 Ice Sphere Molds, 2 Slate Coasters, a Whiskey Drinking Journal (helpful), and some nuts. I’m a tequila girl, but that all sounds pretty f*cking legit.

ColourPop The Big Box of Lippie Stix, $150

I f*cking love ColourPop because it’s legit the same lipstick as Kylie Cosmetics but for like, $5. That was not a typo. While you could spend a million dollars (not an accurate figure) getting every Colourpop lipstick you think you’ll look good in, you could just get ColourPop’s Big Box of Lippie Stix, which includes 48 of their best-selling universally flattering shades, for the lipstick lover in your life. That’s a $240 value, if you can do math.

Betches may receive a portion of revenue if you click a link and purchase a product or service. The links are independently placed and do not influence editorial content.

5 Gifts Your Bridesmaids Actually Want

Getting your bridesmaids a gift is kind of like answering your grandma’s butt-dial calls: it’s not necessary, but you do it anyway because it’s the right thing to do. Brides, you don’t have to buy us jewelry with our names spelled out in diamonds, but getting us a little something is a really nice gesture that goes a long way! Seriously, there are a lot of friends to dump after your wedding and bridesmaids shouldn’t be on that list, so get us a pair of monogrammed slippers or something else we can lose keep forever to be reminded of that time you conference-called us at 3am on a Tuesday to ask if your dress is “too white.” Memories to look back on fondly, am I right? 

Generally, the bride gives her bridesmaids gifts both when asking them to be in the wedding and on the big day. Hope this is news to no one. So if you’re a bride wondering what to give your loyal hoes in different area codes that you want by your side for your wedding, look no further! From the always-a-bridesmaid-never-a-bride herself, here are my personal recommendations for bridesmaids gifts. 

Island to East Side Custom Clutch

Look, getting a gift for a group of people must be hard, so get us one we will all definitely love…like this clutch! There are 39 bag colors to choose from and about a million ways to personalize the writing, so you really can’t go wrong here. In case any of my friends who are about to get married are reading this, my personal favorite is the mini structured asymmetrical clutch with matte silver beads, white letters and a removable silver strap, but I’ve only spent two hours of my life on this site, so what do I know? As someone who has received many a stupid gift, I can confidently say that these very chic clutches are a good move because we will actually wear them again, unlike the monogrammed onesie that “got lost” during my move. 

Shop Betches Bridesmaid Mug

If you’re a bridesmaid, there is a 110% chance that you are drinking a steamy caffeinated beverage at some point between “will you be my bridesmaid?” and the big day, so why not sip said coffee out of a hilarious mug that will most definitely make anyone who sees you with it smile? I have seven beautiful Anthropologie mugs and this mug, and guess which one everyone loves the most when they open my kitchen cabinet looking for wine glasses? Yep, the Shop Betches one. 

BKR Spiked Tutu 500ml

Even though water gives us everything we need to survive and rock a beautiful glow, we do not drink enough of it. Maybe it’s because I’m really busy and forget, or maybe it’s because my big-ass mason jar just isn’t inspiring me. I’ll never know. The first time I saw one of these chic BKR water bottles was in a barre class a year and a half ago, and I’ve thought about getting one every day since. Here’s a few reasons why: they’re glass, so you’re not ingesting all of the toxic sh*t like BPAs commonly found in plastic water bottles, the part you sip from is small, so you don’t have to worry about accidentally dumping water all over yourself at work when you guzzle, and they’re really pretty, so your desk and/or nightstand will look that much cuter. Personally, I like the spiked silicon sleeve, as opposed to the smooth one, because it’s really cute but also badass, which is what every bridesmaid should aspire to be, in my opinion. 

Pinch Provisions Minimergency Kit For Bridesmaids

My sister-in-law gave these to her bridesmaids the day of her wedding and let me just say, I am impressed with how useful this tiny pouch and its contents were to me that day. These little guys are 3.5’ x 2” x 2” and are stuffed with fashion tape, floss, nail polish remover, ibuprofen, tissues, earring backs, blotting wipes, bobby pins and a bunch of other sh*t. I am a very organized person and generally always have my bases covered, but on the day of her wedding, the hair stylist accidentally knocked my earring back out and I chipped a nail trying to find it. If you thought my sister-in-law was about to let me walk down the aisle with a chipped nail and one earring, think again. Luckily, I had my handy-dandy Minimergency Kit to save the day! They come in eight different colors, four of which are sparkly, so take your pick!

Sugarfina Will You Be My Bridesmaid Bento Box

People who don’t like sweets are not to be trusted. Sugarfina products are truly superior to all other candy companies, so getting not one, but three of the brand’s signature boxes is a great gift. The bento box is filled with three of Sugarfina’s best-selling gummies, which include Champagne bears, Pink Diamonds, and Champagne Bubbles. The boxes are enclosed with a sticker that reads, “will you,” “be my,” and “bridesmaid?” I mean, is that cute or what? Fun fact: the Champagne Bears are made with Dom Pérignon! 

Images: Unsplash; Sugarfina; Pinch Provisions; Shop Betches, Island To East; My BKR
Betches may receive a portion of revenue if you click a link and purchase a product or service. The links are independently placed and do not influence editorial content.

5 Customizable Bridal Gifts For Every Type Of Bride

One of the hardest things about weddings (other than nosy guests, dress codes, and unexpected bridal party costs) is figuring out the perfect gift for the bride. You want your gift to stand out from everyone else’s (duh), but not in a “I spent $5,000 on this just because I can” kind of way. (Or in that way! If you’re attending my wedding, certainly in that way. I just can’t afford to return the favor.) Anyway, when it comes to bridal gifts, you don’t want to phone it in and get her something average that everyone else will get her (how many Instant Pots does one couple need?). Customizing gifts is an easy way to make it seem like you put in a ton of effort and prove to everyone what a good friend you are (without spending that much more money or time). If that sounds interesting to you, check out these five customizable bridal gift options below. You’ll find something even your fussiest friend will secretly covet, guaranteed.

Rae Of Light Clutches

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Rae Of Light is a brand offering small, customizable handbags, and they just rolled out a full bridal collection. Yes, that means clutches that say “Bride” (pictured above) “I DO,” “Mrs.” etc., each in a more hype shade of glitter than the last. And those are just their pre-made designs; you can (and should) also order custom bags with the bride’s new last name, wedding date, or bachelorette party hashtag. Because frankly, the only thing better than a clutch that reminds people you’re getting married is one that also reminds people of how f*cking epic your bachelorette weekend in Tulum was. These bags don’t only make a great gift for the bride, but also for the entire wedding party as well. And for a limited time, Betches readers can get their first bag for 10% off using the code BetchesBrides at checkout! So, really, you have no reason not to get one.

Wedding Favorites Sun Hats

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Personalized Mrs Gifts make the cutests bridal shower gifts for the bride to take on her honeymoon! ☀️??⁣ .⁣ .⁣ .⁣ .⁣ .⁣ #WeddingFavorites #bridalshowerideas #bridalshowergift #bridegift #bacheloretteparty #bacheloretteweekend #bridestyle #bridebabe #bride2be #brideinspo #bridegoals #misstomrs #mrs #engaged #weddingideas_brides #weddinggift #honeymoongift #justhitched #2019bride #bridetobe #justengaged #engagementgift #newlastname #justmarried #sunhat #clutchbag #stylishbride #bridalstyle #floppyhat #beachhat

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Does the bride’s bachelorette party take place at a beach locale, by any chance? Great, your work is done here. These sun hats can be customized with each person’s name (and are affordable enough that you can splurge on a set for the full bridesmaid crew). Have a few members of your crew who are terrible at putting on sunscreen, burn on day 1, and complain about it the whole time? Not anymore. Tie this hat on them and tell them the bride says they’re not allowed to take it off. Once they see how cute group pics are with these matching hats, I doubt they’ll be complaining.

CuteSayings Swim Suits

I’m giving you more than one option for a customizable beach bachelorette gift, both because I’m incredibly generous and because the beach-bound bachelorette trip is a classic, and you’ll definitely go on more than one. (Thank god! Isn’t going to the beach all anyone wants to do anyway?) These swim suits from CuteSayings have a bridal line with logos like “Team Bride,” “Bride Squad,” “Final Fiesta,” or whatever the f*ck you want. It’s fully customizable, so feel free to put some inside joke from 5th grade that you have with the bride, or go for more a more neutral theme if you’re shelling out for a group.

Shop Betches Jackets

Is the bride more of a city girl? Does she call bridal showers “too girly” and insist she doesn’t want any gifts (then freak out over the ones she really loves)? Yeah, you’ll want to get her a Shop Betches jacket, and customize it so well that she feels like she designed it herself. If that sounds impossible, just take a look at the customizing options. If you’re friends with someone whose personality doesn’t revolve around champagne, pizza, dogs, diamonds, and being rude to people, is she even really your friend?

Mark & Graham Wine Glasses

Finally, a gift that ~truly~ every bride will thank you for. I feel very strongly that stemless wine glasses are the way of the future—and if you’ve ever been in a room full of drunk women, I imagine you understand why. The customizing on these glasses means you can take them in pretty much any direction: if they’re functioning as a bachelorette party gift, spring for colored glass and raunchy slogans (or bridesmaid initials, if you’re feeling cute); if you’re hoping they’ll actually last the couple a while, you can do a sleek monogram on clear glass (pictured above). Either way, I’ve never heard someone say “sh*t, why do I have so many wine glasses?!” Have you?

There you have it, my friends. Easy (and shockingly affordable) customizable gifts that tell the bride in your life “I love you, I made this just for you, and I want you to remember how good at gifts I am when my own wedding comes around.” The best part? You can get them all without leaving your couch—as God and Jeff Bezos intended.

Images: @raeoflightcustom; @weddingfavorites / Instagram, @CuteSayings / Etsy, Shop Betches, Mark & Graham

8 Holiday Gifts For The Coworkers You Actually Like

I don’t think I need to remind you that it’s the holiday season. This means you’re supposed to start thinking about buying gifts for other people, ugh. Worst part? It’s not just your family. You’ve got to get stuff for your friends, for your kind-of boyfriend, Secret Santa gifts for your coworkers… it’s all v stressful.

But if you’re on a personal quest to be crowned the nicest, coolest, fetchest person in the office, then it’s time to think about gifts for your coworkers. You don’t need to go balls to the wall, but these are people you likely spend the majority of your Monday through Friday with. Small gestures go far, and this could totally (maybe) pay off for you later.

Here are a few collective and individual gifts for your coworkers that say “hi, I’m cool and got you something cause I’m thoughtful” without coming off as creepy or desperate. You can thank us when that promotion comes through.

1. Coffee And Treats

Everyone loves coffee and treats when at the office. Diets don’t exist when you’re in that fluorescent-lit sixth circle of hell. Honestly though, if you’re looking to please EVERYONE in the office rather than buying a bunch of individual gifts, get things to eat and caffeine to drink. Wandering Bear makes a delicious peppermint cold brew (also regular and vanilla) that comes in individual boxes or a giant 96 oz. monster that can be delivered right to your office.You could also just stop at Dunkin’ or Krispy Kreme if people are more into the typical hot coffee (esp. great if it’s negative three degrees outside).

Pair with a few boxes of freshly made doughnuts OR get super fancy with it and order brownies (or bonbons) from this small mom-and-pop North Carolina shop, French Broad Chocolates or Harry & David if you’re fancy and into large corporations.

Wandering Bear Organic Cold Brew Coffee

2. Desktop Organizers

Is your work husband’s desk so disgusting it’s become a joke? Get him a “clean it up” gift basket with monitor wipes or mista desk organizer, and pocketbook on Feng Shui. It’s a win-win. You’re encouraging him to clean up his sh*t so he can be more organized and you don’t have to look at his crusty monitor anymore.

Joss & Main Camile Desk Organizer

3. Lip Balm And Hand Cream

If the folks in your office are anything like me, they’re constantly searching for hand cream and lip balm because of how full of black mold dry the office is. Get some desk #necessities in the form of Nyakio lip balm, cuticle cream, Burt’s Bees, and the ALWAYS amazing Neutrogena Norwegian Formula Hand Cream. Make sure whatever products you pick are free of any color or glitter. If you do go this direction with your gifts, you won’t have to look at people’s nasty dry hands or lips anymore. Yay!

Nyakio Baobab Lip Balm

4. Plants

Plants are a wonderful gift if you feel that more oxygen in the office would truly benefit everyone and you’re confident that the plants won’t die within the first week of your recipients having them. Snake plants are a great option because they’re practically impossible to kill. Succulents are even better if the recipient is likely to forget about watering their new gift. Bonus points if you find something that incorporates plants into something functional, like a “smartphone valet” (whatever that is… do I need to tip it?).

Uncommon Goods Smartphone Valet and Planter

5. Cubicle Guest Book

If you don’t know where a coworker stands on caring for living things (or you work in a sad, windowless room), this cubicle guest book is a fun, cheap, and kind of universal option. It’s hilarious because, like, they have to interact with others and make them sign it with fun notes. We all know how awesome interacting with people can be in an office environment, don’t we?

Knock Knock Guest Book Cubicle

6. DIY Cookie Mix

Don’t feel like spending money or applying effort other than pouring ingredients into a Mason jar? Cool! Create a DIY brownie or cookie mix and slap on a cute tag tied with adorable ribbon. It’ll cost you next to nothing since you likely have sugar, flour, and whatever else in your pantry. Or, you can buy pre-done ones and say they’re your handiwork!

The Mason Jar Cookie Company Cookie Mix

7. Desk Games

Desktop golf, basketball, and other games are all great gifts for your coworkers, because they will help distract your everybody from doing real work while providing hours of entertainment. Your boss will probs hate it, but you’ll become an office legend.

Uncommon Goods Desktop Basketball

8. Dammit Dolls

This is perfect for that coworker who’s always shouting obscenities from their office or cubicle. These are stress relievers in the shape of tiny people that you can throw into walls, drive pins in to, choke, curse at, etc. They’re great for anyone looking to lessen their outbursts directed towards individual people. Now they can channel that very rage into an inanimate object. Healthy!

Paper Source Dammit Dolls

Images: rawpixel/Unsplash; Paper Source; Uncommon Goods (2) Amazon (5); Joss & Main; Ulta
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What To Get Him For The Holidays Based On How Long You’ve Been Dating

With the holidays (help) around the corner, it’s kind of time you start thinking about wtf to get the dude in your life for Christmas/Hannukah/Kwanzaa/Festivus. There are many possibilities, from flannel shirts to designer watches to apps that let you casually stalk him. All of these things, though, fall into categories of appropriateness (is that a word?) dependent upon how long you all have been boning or, like, dating. So here’s what to get him based on how long you’ve been dating.

0-3 Months

This is kind of more of a “fun” gift than a serious one; especially considering you all started dating right at the cusp of cuffing season. Considering you aren’t sure 100% on whether or not he’s a psycho yet, this isn’t the time to go above and beyond with hundred-dollar gifts. With great relationships come great responsibility, according to Spider-Man. Anyway, if you’ve passed the one month hurdle and are well into month two or three, you need to look at spending, like, $25-75, tops.

Carhartt Unisex Multi Tool

Carhartt Multi-Tool: It’s something he’ll use, it’s small, and you’ll only be out $10 when he ghosts you in two months. Praise be.
“Night-In” Box: One brilliant idea is curating a “night-in” box with Cool Haus ice cream (or Ben & Jerry’s, whatever), cozy slippers, and a nice (but cheap) bottle of wine (or non-Jose tequila if that’s more his speed). It’s like you’re doing the date planning for him, plus you won’t be dropping major cash on this.
Flannel Shirts from JCrew or Woolrich: Honestly, the guys I talked to wanted these any time anyway, and they’re not a “we’re super serious” gift. Flannel can be worn by just about any guy, regardless of style. Is he a hipster? Is he v ironic? Does he work construction? Does he like tying them around his waist when he feels like his ass looks fat? You probably haven’t even figured him out yet and this gift STILL works. See. Everyone could use a flannel. Plus, you can always steal it later.
Beer: Yes, really. If he’s into craft beer, get a nice sampler and slap a bow on it. Just try to pay attention to what he drinks when you’re blackout at the bar.

3-6 Months

The three to six month time period is usually the time a dude wants to know you “get” him, so thoughtfulness counts more than dropping dollaz.

Man Crates Exotic Meats Crate

Man Crates: We recommend fun sh*t like a Man Crate, filled with meat snacks, tools, and other “he-man” items. It’ll give him an excuse to pry open a literal wooden crate with the included crow bar (yes, rly) and then indulge in exotic meat snacks so he can brag to his idiot friends that he ate ostrich and alligator. Aside from jerky items, you can also get “project” crates, so he can learn how to carve his own wooden pipe and be an all new kind of asshole.
V Specific Gift Cards: If he’s hugely into outdoor sh*t from R.E.I., get a gift card. If he goes from six to midnight whenever he thinks about leather bound books, maybe a gift card to Barnes & Noble is in order. It isn’t a cop-out, it’s showing you know he digs certain things. This is allowing him to get whatever he wants from a place you know he enjoys. Don’t let the gift card be the ONLY thing you get, obviously, but make it enough that he can get something worthwhile.
Concert Tickets: In keeping with the whole you “get” him thing, get tickets to his favorite band (within reason) that won’t cost you an entire paycheck.

6-12 Months

Hooray, you made it more than six months and haven’t ghosted each other. If your relationship was the size of a in-utero child, it’d be an eggplant. That made me gag a little, how about you? Anyway, we’re getting into almost serious territory here, so you should be spending a decent amount of money on and putting thoughtfulness into his gift.

Amazon Echo Dot

Amazon Echo or Alexa or Google Thing: I refuse to acknowledge whatever the Google thing’s name is, but you catch my drift. Chances are your dude (and most dudes) need a robot woman to tell them if it’s raining or how many cups are in a quart or whether or not the NASDAQ is crashing. Robots are the future, so investing in one of these know-it-all glorified Bluetooth speakers is a nice gesture.
A Nice Watch: If you’re in the 6-12 month range, a nice watch (especially if he doesn’t have one) is a great gift. We’re not saying you need to go out and fetch a Rolex; there are tons of brands that are well-made and don’t carry an insane price tag. If your dude is outdoorsy, Luminox is a great option. If he’s into flannel and wood, grab a Filson. And if he has no discernible style, like, whatsoever, but enjoys nice things, Citizen is a great choice.
Couples Massages: Lay naked next to each other awkwardly while strangers touch you! Honestly, less guys than ladies tend to treat themselves to massages, so getting one with him may put him at ease about the whole thing. Plus, if he’s never ventured into daiye day spa territory, he’s in for a pleasant surprise.

More Than One Year

Y’all are practically married. If you’ve been dating more than one year and have never been “on a break” or “seeing other people,” you can go p serious on the gift front.

Holy Stone HS700 FPV Drone

Drone: Do you want to encourage his habit of disturbing wildlife or spying on neighbors? Get him a drone. He’ll definitely be entertained for at least a month.
MasterClass: These include cooking taught and screamed about by Gordon Ramsey, photography by Annie Leibovitz, and creative writing by Margaret Atwell. Give him the gift that keeps on giving: a literal life skill.
Weekend Getaway: Your guy not into learning? That’s cool. Book a weekend getaway somewhere he’d like. Look into the Baseball/Rock N Roll/Football/Country/IDFK Hall of Fame. Take him to a sports outing that you normally wouldn’t be caught dead attending. Go to a concert or get sushi at that place you hate. This is kind of about him, and you can definitely plan something nice-ish for under $500 if you think ahead of time.
That Thing He Won’t Buy For Himself: Does he have a set of satin pajamas you know he loves but won’t buy? A massage chair? A pedicure? Once you’re in for the long(ish) haul, you should know him well enough to get him the thing he would not go out and buy on his own. Maybe its boudoir pictures of yourself, or a year-long subscription to a dog-centered magazine. Whatever.

Images: Kira auf der Heide /Unsplash; Amazon (2); Man Crates; Carhartt