Fourth of July

The Fourth of July is almost here, and if you’re anything like me, you’ll be spending your long weekend in a darkened room with everyone’s favorite obligatory psychotic jackass, Logan Echolls.

Every 4th of July, there are certain things that are guaranteed: hotdogs, fireworks, and drunk girls everywhere in tacky "American" outfits.

Honestly, how is it July already?

The 4th of July is almost here and we can practically taste the red, white, and blue Jell-O shots! (They're sooo cute...until they come back up Thursday morning.) The point is, you only have two days left to put together a perfect holiday-appropriate outfit for getting blackout at a BBQ celebrating America's independence.

How you spend the Fourth of July says a lot about you.

Whether you spent your long weekend taking poolside tequila shots or eating lobster rolls while scouting out the underwhelming crowd at Gurney’s, you currently feel like shit.

Listen up, heathens.