We Have To Talk About Trump’s Antisemitism

My Jewish identity has been a huge part of my life since I was born. I was lucky enough to grow up somewhere with a large Jewish community. I went to a Jewish summer camp, participated in youth groups, and now go to a college with a relatively large Jewish population. So, while I grew up aware of antisemitism, I’m privileged in that my own experiences of it have been pretty limited. 

Unfortunately, this is not super common for American Jews. As the Anti-Defamation Leauge (ADL) reported, antisemitic attacks are only becoming more frequent across the United States. In 2019, a recorded 2,107 anti-semitic incidents took place across the country. This was a 12 percent rise from the year before and the highest number since the ADL began recording.

Antisemitism is widespread across both major parties in the United States. Sometimes, it seems like attacks on Jewish people are coming from all sides. While we would expect a normal president to denounce all types of hate, including antisemitism, this isn’t the case with Trump. Instead, he covers up his antisemitic policies and behaviors with pro-Israel policy. 

For his entire presidency, Donald Trump has leaned on being “good for American Jews” because he is “good for Israel.” This week alone, during an annual pre-Rosh Hashanah (the Jewish New Year) call with Jewish leaders, Trump said, “We really appreciate you… we love your country also.” 

This isn’t the first time he has said something like this. Over the last several years, Trump has repeatedly implied that Jewish Americans should be grateful for his actions in the Middle East and his strengthened ties with the current Israeli Prime Minister. And, peace is a great thing, no matter who the President is, part of their job is helping further peace plans whenever possible. My problem isn’t with that, and honestly, I’m not even here to write about conflicts in the Middle East. 

My problem is that when Trump views Jewish Americans’ electoral support as tied to Israel, he is perpetuating the idea of ‘dual loyalty.’ The concept of dual loyalty is an antisemitic dog whistle that implies that Jewish people are inherently disloyal and place the global Jewish community over the countries in which they live. In the United States, it is used to imply that American Jews can’t be 100% loyal to America because some of their loyalty is owed to Israel or the international Jewish community. 

Trump’s attempts to win Jewish people’s electoral support are all based on the extremely reductive assumption that American Jews’ top policy concern is Israel. While it may be the case for some members of the Jewish community, it certainly isn’t true for everyone. By only attempting to appeal to Jewish voters through Middle Eastern policy, the Trump administration actively ignores dangerous forms of antisemitism in America. 

White supremacy and antisemitism are inextricable from each other. We all remember what Donald Trump said after the Unite The Right rally in 2017: “you also had people that were very fine people, on both sides.” Many of the “very fine people” that Trump was talking about were carrying Nazi flags and shouting, “Jews will not replace us.”

Throughout his presidency, Trump has clung to white supremacists’ support, endorsed their actions, and continuously given them platforms. The most recent example of this is Trump’s embracing of the QAnon conspiracy theory, which has blatantly anti-semitic roots. The theory pushes the narrative that the Rothschild family holds control of every bank in America and alleges that a secret ‘elite’ class dominates other important industries such as the media. 

A few weeks ago, when asked about the conspiracy group, Trump said, “I don’t know much about the movement other than I understand they like me very much, which I appreciate.” This is just another case of Trump not only dismissing dangerous antisemitism, but giving it a platform. 

American Jews are not a monolithic group, and we care about a lot of things. Like I said, the top priority for some Jewish people may be the state of Israel, and that’s ok. However, it is neither mine nor many of the Jewish voters I talk to. In fact, around 75% of Jewish voters supported Hillary Clinton in the last election, and Jewish voters consistently make up a large Democratic party base. 

This baffles Trump, who, despite his claims of being a great ally to the Jewish community, said that he thinks that if “any Jewish people that vote for a Democrat — it shows either a total lack of knowledge or great disloyalty.”

If the President actually cared about Jewish voters, he would stop perpetuating the incredibly dangerous narrative of dual loyalty and denounce white supremacy. But, I’m not really holding my breath. 



We’re All (Still) Being Gaslit

While it’s no All Too Well or, even, Cruel Summer, since Folklore came out last week, I’ve listened to the song Mad Woman too many times to count. I then went back and made an entire Spotify playlist with songs about being gaslit because, tbh, I’m kind of going through it right now. 

Obviously, songs like Mad Woman always hit differently, but, around my 15th listen, I also happened to be scrolling through Twitter when I saw one too many Trump tweets and started to get, like, really angry. Then I remembered that the Trump campaign and most of the GOP is relying on the same gaslighting tactics as every boy Taylor writes about and the all of the f*ckboys I’ve *almost* dated. 

Before I get ahead of myself, gaslighting is a form of manipulation that makes someone feel like they’re actually crazy, forcing them to invalidate their own thoughts and feelings. While it’s most common in interpersonal and romantic relationships, it can happen at a wider scale, like when the president gaslights his entire country.  

Here are a few examples of talking points that they use to gaslight Americans: 

“The Radical Left”

The Radical Left Democrats: First they try to take away your guns. Then they try to take away your police!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) June 12, 2020

Donald Trump, everyone who works at Fox, and most of the Republican party have latched onto the phrase “radical left” over the last several years. They tend to like using it as a description of most of the policies that the Democratic party supports and advocates for. As someone who studied politics in London for a semester and hasn’t shut up about it, it’s really important that we deconstruct the myth that a “radical left” exists in America. “Radical left” policies like increased access to healthcare and gun control are commonplace in most countries. In many, they’re even seen as the bare minimum.

While political commentators like to talk about the fact that American parties are more polarized – or further apart – than ever. This narrative implies that the Democratic and Republican parties have moved left and right, respectively, at the same rate.

This is absolutely not the case, as demonstrated by this New York Times article from last year. The Democrats certainly have moved to the left, but the GOP has moved much further right at a quicker rate, leaving Democrats way closer to the center than the Republican party. 

The term “radical left” is really just a way to force the left to concede on important legislation and aspects of the Democratic party’s platform.

It’s also worth considering that the fear of having a candidate that was seen as radical is part of the reason we went from the youngest, most diverse field in history to picking an old white guy for a nominee (love you, Joe!). 

IDK about anyone else, but this has direct parallels to the guy who told me I was being crazy and controlling when I said I’d appreciate it if he maybe stopped hooking up with other girls, please? Like, I was really asking for a bare minimum level of respect, but to him, it was “moving too fast, and it was way too much!” 

IDK!? I just feel like whether it’s from guys or politicians, we shouldn’t have to beg for the bare minimum. 

 

“They’re Taking Away Our Rights” 

THANK YOU to the 5 million members of the @NRA for once again entrusting me with your FULL & COMPLETE ENDORSEMENT! As long as I am President, I will ALWAYS protect our Great Second Amendment, and never let the Radical Left take away your Rights, your Guns, or your Police! @NRAPVF https://t.co/8ZhChqxgBI

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) July 17, 2020

Let’s go back to things like gun control for a hot sec to talk about rights. Conservatives love to use the Second Amendment to push back on arguments for increased gun control. While I’m not going to fully get into this debate because I can only dedicate one or two of the very few brain cells I have left to this, I want to point out what the actual amendment says. 

“A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.” 

So, the Second Amendment was written and ratified in 1789, when our country was literally brand new. We didn’t have a legitimate army, in fact, part of the motivation behind the Second Amendment was that the founders were nervous about the country having a strong standing army like Britain’s. They were worried that a standing army would limit citizens’ rights. There would always be a looming threat that the federal government could deploy against its citizens.

If you think this sounds like anything that might be happening around the country today? You’re right. But, I digress. 

The argument that gun control is taking away Second Amendment rights reminds me of a guy who likes to revise history and change the meanings of words mid-fight. You know, the kind who says, “just because I said I really liked you, slept over every other night for two months, and brought you to my grandpa’s 94th birthday party doesn’t mean I had feelings for you, I thought you knew that.” 

 

“This Is What Joe Biden’s America Will Look Like”

Joe Biden and the Radical Left want to Abolish Police, Abolish ICE, Abolish Bail, Abolish Suburbs, Abolish the 2nd Amendment – and Abolish the American Way of Life. No one will be SAFE in Joe Biden’s America!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) July 15, 2020

 

You may have noticed a new round of Trump ads that depict what he thinks America will look like under a Biden presidency. These ads have footage of protests, riots, and violence that have all happened during the Trump presidency. The ads also falsely say that Biden is in favor of defunding the police despite him saying the opposite in several interviews. 

These ads are the same as saying “seriously, I can’t believe you’re upset about the way I talk to you, it could be so much worse. It’s not like I’m manipulating or lying to you, all I did was say it’s psycho that you told your friends about me and punched a hole in the wall.” 

While we’re on the subject, let’s touch upon how Trump gaslights his own base. It cracks me up that his supporters keep walking around with MAGA hats as if Trump’s campaign didn’t briefly try to use “Keep America Great.”

MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) July 27, 2020

MAGA gives his base a goal and a fictional enemy, completely distracting from the reality that over the last almost four years, Trump has accomplished almost nothing he promised his supporters he has, and America is further from ‘greatness’ than it has been in quite a long time. 

 

“Mail-In Ballots Lead to Fraud” 

 

There is NO WAY (ZERO!) that Mail-In Ballots will be anything less than substantially fraudulent. Mail boxes will be robbed, ballots will be forged & even illegally printed out & fraudulently signed. The Governor of California is sending Ballots to millions of people, anyone…..

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) May 26, 2020

 

This is one of the more dangerous examples of manipulation by the Trump campaign, and one Twitter flagged as misleading. In a typical year, somewhere around 20% of Americans vote either by mail or through absentee ballot (spoiler alert: they’re literally the same thing). Though this 20% includes the Trump family and most of his administration, Trump has recently picked safe, mail-in ballots, as his new enemy. He has called them unsafe and said that they would put us at further risk of election tampering. More candidly, he expressed fear that expansion of early voting and vote by mail means that “you’d never have a Republican elected in this country again.” 

Multiple studies have shown that not only is voting by mail safe, but it is proven to favor neither party. However, in a normal year, in-person voting serves as a barrier to many people getting to cast their ballots at all, and, in a pandemic, this will obviously be worsened. What Trump really is saying is that when people who may not ordinarily get to vote are given the option and when more people vote in general, Republicans often lose. (He has also openly said this.)

Here, we’re being told not to trust an institution that is not only very trustworthy but vital to the functioning of democracy. It’s like being told that your friend is lying to you and jealous after telling a significant other that the same friend saw them cheating on you or pointed out your significant other’s problematic behavior. 

Personally, I think that these manipulation tactics coming from elected officials impact women in different ways than they do men. Women are often gaslit by their significant others, co-workers, family members, and even friends. While some women do the gaslighting, we are more likely to be on the receiving end. 

When these tactics become commonplace in daily interactions, they can have devastating psychological impacts. According to Psychology Today, over time, a victim of gaslighting will stop trusting their own judgment, over apologize, question their knowledge or memory, and have difficulties making decisions. 

Gaslighting is just one of many forms of emotional abuse and manipulation that society conditions women to accept and that we see in our political world. Last week, AOC was verbally attacked in front of the media, our president regularly comments on female politicians and reporters’ looks, the list of misogyny in politics goes on and on. All of these things are connected to one another. 

The idea that Trump is a misogynistic, manipulative narcissist who uses gaslighting for political power is not new at all, but it’s getting worse. The effects of gaslighting by Trump and his cronies have already impacted the 2020 election and will continue doing so. 

Just like our toxic exes, Trump probably won’t change, so it’s up to us to be aware of what he is doing and dump his ass on November third. 

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Gen-Z Found A New Way To Troll Trump Online

I’m not sure 2020 has been a good year for anyone, but some people are still determined to make the most of it. I, for one, remain super impressed with Gen-Z’s dedication to trolling Donald Trump, repeatedly using TikTok and other methods at their disposal to rain on his sh*tty parade time after time. Finally, there is hope for the future.

As you may recall, the TikTok teens, along with the good samaritans of K-Pop Twitter, banded together last month to massively inflate attendance expectations for Trump’s big return to the campaign trail in Tulsa. The arena was mostly empty, the photos were glorious, and everyone had fun. But since then, the teens have still been hard at work coming up with new and exciting ways to mess with Trump.

This week, it was reported that the Trump administration wants to ban TikTok in the United States. According to Trump, banning the app (which originated in China) would be a way for our country to retaliate against China for giving us the coronavirus. Sounds unbelievable, but at this point, is anyone surprised that Trump wants to do something like this? But on top of wanting to punish China, it seems like Trump might want to put a stop to the Zoomers using TikTok against him.

Of course, these kids aren’t going down without a fight. In response to Trump’s threats to delete their favorite app, they hatched a plan to delete his favorite app: the official Trump 2020 campaign app. According to the people of TikTok, Apple’s App Store has a quality control policy where any app that has an average rating of one star gets removed. It’s questionable whether or not this policy actually exists, but we can play along for now. Basically, the plan is to spam Trump’s app with as many one-star ratings as possible, so the average drops, and his app will be removed from the App Store.

omg guys.. it would be so bad if we got the app store to delete trumps app definitely do NOT leave a one star review that would be so bad could u imagine pic.twitter.com/kHcidOR1H8

— 𝙜𝙞𝙖⁷ (@FL0WERH0YA) July 9, 2020

While it’s unclear if this will actually work, the app has been flooded with thousands of negative reviews, and the app’s average rating currently sits at an abysmal 1.2 stars. But it’s not just the TikTokers ruining the app’s score—a quick scroll of the reviews suggests that the app might just suck in general. One reviewers wrote “I downloaded this app to keep up with when the rallies were. I’m devastated to say that this app took hours to load.” Damn, “devastated” is a strong word, but that’s so rough. Other sincere reviews note frustration with the fact that the app requires you to register an account and share your location services. GTFO, Trump!

But there are also plenty of less serious reviews that are funny as f*ck. One reviewer complained that they “downloaded this app to hopefully improve my spray tan skills,” but were disappointed to realize that “is NOT what this app is for AT ALL.” So misleading, honestly. Another claimed that the app took 69 days to download (nice), then filled their camera roll with unwanted pictures of bare feet. Gotta love all this creativity coming from America’s youth.

The current attack on Trump’s app reviews might seem creative, but it’s actually not the first time Gen-Z has used this same tactic. Back in April, as schools across the country transitioned to at-home instruction, the reviews for the widely-used Google Classroom app were similarly flooded with negativity, with such insightful comments as “I don’t wanna do work during lockdown.” The app’s average rating currently sits at 1.5 stars, which seems high when compared with the Trump app, but it was never removed from the App Store.

At the end of the day, it’s unlikely that Apple will remove the Trump 2020 app, but all these 1-star reviews are still good for a laugh. If you’re feeling particularly stressed about the upcoming election (same), feel free to go leave a sh*tty review just as a way to vent. Let it out sweetie, put it in the book App Store.

Images: Frederic Legrand – COMEO / Shutterstock.com; flowerhoya / Twitter; App Store

Kellyanne Conway’s 15-Year-Old Daughter Is Trolling Trump On Tik Tok

Claudia Conway has entered the chat.

The Conway family is well known for their political division, with Kellyanne serving as a senior counsel to the president and her husband, George III serving as an advisor to the anti-Trump Lincoln Project and constantly tweeting that the president is unfit for office. Basically, they’re like the Romeo and Juliet of American politics. Their star crossed love story aside, at the end of the day, both are registered as Republicans. 

Typically, when the Conways are in the news, it tends to be because George III responded to something horrible that the White House did and is directly opposing his wife. However, this time, a new family member is at the center of focus. 

Claudia Conway, the 15-year-old daughter of Kellyanne and George has been going viral with her Tik Tok activity. To be VERY CLEAR, I didn’t have it on my 2020 bingo card, but looks like I am Claudia Conway’s newest fan.

Like many other members of gen-z who are too young to vote in 2020, Claudia is using Tik Tok to advocate for the causes she believes in and help mobilize older Tik Tok users to vote. Many of Claudia’s Tik Toks feature her advocating for the BLM movement, speaking up against toxic masculinity, actively advocating against Trump, and supporting Black content creators.

She also uses Instagram as a platform for activism. She has shared several posts advocating for mental health awareness, the BLM movement, and taking precautionary safety measures seriously in the pandemic. Here she is lipsyncing over a sound questioning why pro-life people who consider abortion murder to fail to raise the alarm when Black Americans are killed in public. And here, she mocks Trump fans who can’t handle being criticized for supporting a dictatorial white supremacist (ok, our words.)

As her social media accounts have grown more and more popular over the last day, she has made her message to both supporters and haters very clear: it is important to educate yourself and speak truth to power. 

View this post on Instagram

“when the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace.” — jimi hendrix to the black community, YOU matter. all black lives matter. black women. black men. black LGTBQIA+. you all matter. keep fighting. this isn’t over yet. to non-black people, like myself, we must use our privilege for good. we MUST be allies. we must listen. we must educate ourselves. we ALL must advocate. this isn’t a matter of bipartisan politics. we all must check our bias at the door. we must check our political affiliations at the door. this is a human rights movement. we must come together. we will not stop speaking out until an end is put to this. let’s end systemic racism and destroy the agenda of institutional racism. let’s get on the RIGHT side of history. 🖤✊🏽✊🏿✊🏾 #blacklivesmatter #juneteenth

A post shared by claudia conway (@claudiamconway) on

Not only is Claudia a great example of how younger people are using the app to participate in a political system that they are not yet old enough to formally contribute to, but she is totally badass for sharing her opinions. She has explained, several times, that even though her parents are famous conservative politicians she still works hard to form her own, educated opinions, even if they contradict that of her parents. She also has been very clear that just because they differ in opinions does not mean they love each other any less. I know how draining it can be to have a ~spirited conversation~ over tough issues with loved ones who disagree with you, and I literally couldn’t imagine being in Claudia’s shoes.

Claudia is only one of many gen-z Tik Tokers who are using the platform for advocacy and to troll Trump. Over the last month, advocacy on Tik Tok has skyrocketed. Creators are making catchy songs to explain systemic racism, to expose injustices in the political system, and explain the importance of registering to vote. Between tricking Trump’s campaign store to thinking that they’re out of merch to flooding a meet and greet raffle with fake submissions, younger Americans are doing everything in their power to make sure the president doesn’t have four more years in office.

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The Wildest Moments From The White House Tell-All Trump Doesn’t Want You To See

As if there wasn’t enough going on in the world, one of America’s least favorite attention seekers decided now was the time to force himself into the spotlight. That’s right, former National Security Advisor to the Trump Administration, John Bolton decided that now was a good time to publish hs long-awaited book The Room Where It Happened – which, BTW, is a total rip off of Hamilton – and has been causing drama for, like, six months. 

Last November, Bolton took to Twitter to start promoting his book, which is basically just a list of all of the shitty things Trump did while Bolton worked for him. Here’s the thing, Bolton obviously thought these crimes were serious enough to at least warrant writing a burn book, but still, he didn’t testify during the impeachment hearings. 

While the book is set to come out next week, President Trump is losing his shit about being #exposed, so the Justice Department keeps trying to illegally come up with reasons to block it, either because it includes falsehoods or classified information — Trump can’t make up his mind. 

In the epilogue of the book, Bolton apparently explains that the book has no classified information, and Trump is just upset because it “revealed information that can only be described as embarrassing to Trump or as indicative of possible impermissible behavior.”

A number of news outlets have tracked down advanced copies, which we have adapted as a Burn Book of sorts. Much like Regina George, John Bolton likes to write about crimes instead of reporting them. 

Donald Trump Thought Finland Was Part Of Russia 

Throughout the book, Bolton recounts private convos with Don over his 18 months of service. He claims Trump once asked former Chief of Staff John Kelly if Finland was part of Russia, if the UK had any nuclear weapons (yes), and raged about Pearl Harbor during discussions of Japan. 

He also felt conflicted about supporting Venezuelan opposition leader Juan Guaidó over Nicolás Maduro because he didn’t think Guaidó was manly enough. 

Donald Trump Became Obsessed With Sending The North Korean Dictator A Personalized Gift 

Trump apparently regretted calling North Korean leader  Kim Jong Un “ROCKETMAN” on Twitter and wanted to smooth things by delivering an autographed copy of Elton John’s “Rocket Man” on CD to prove it was actually a term of endearment. 

Such a gift would violate U.S. sanctions against the authoritarian regime, but getting it “remained a high priority for several months,” Bolton writes. Un is a millennial, Don, he doesn’t want your Compact Disc. 

Donald Trump Promised To Intervene In The Justice System To Give World Leaders Favorable Treatment 

Bolton says that in 2018, Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan asked Trump to look at a case involving a Turkish firm under investigation by a U.S. Attorney for violating Iranian sanctions.

Trump told Erdogan he would “take care of things” once he got Obama’s prosecutors out. Trump’s refusal to stand up to Erdogan also resulted in the U.S. removing troops from Syria, leaving our Kurdish allies in the dust.

Donald Trump Does Not Care About Human Rights 

Bolton says that Trump told China’s leader that he approved of the construction of camps to detain the members of the country’s Uighur Muslim minority. Hundreds of thousands of Uighur Muslims have been held by the Chinese government for “re-education.”

Just this week, Trump signed a law calling for sanctions to punish Chinese officials for human rights abuses against Uighur Muslims.

Donald Trump Is A Cheater

Of course, the President has been trying to cheat in his elections with Ukraine and China. We all knew that ‘The Donald’ tried to extort Ukraine into helping him get dirt on his political opponent, namely Joe Biden’s son. Cheating is this President’s MO, so we shouldn’t be surprised that he took his moves over to China. 

According to Bolton’s book, Trump asked Xi Jinping, the President of China, to promise that China would buy more produce from American farmers. This would raise his favorability among farmers because that would increase their income, and Trump would be tied to it, bettering his re-election chances. 

Trump asks other leaders to help him win in return for support so often that we should come up with a name for it… maybe we could go with ‘quid pro quo?’

Donald Trump Is A Total Wanna-Be 

Turns out that Donald “LAW AND ORDER!!!” Trump doesn’t believe that dictators and people in power should face legal consequences for illegal actions. Wild. We already knew Donald Trump is a massive fan of obstructing justice. In his book, Bolton says that Trump seems to have adopted “obstruction of justice as a way of life.” 

Apparently, the President is a big fan of intervening in Justice Department investigations that target his friends. Trump is so disgustingly desperate to get approval from dictators across the globe that he will literally do anything to appease them. Two of the many examples of Trump obstructing justice include him trying to get Halkbank of Turkey and ZTE, a Chinese company, out of investigations over sanction violations. 

Donald Trump Is Toxic AF

When “Mean Girls” taught us about the different high school cliques, they must have forgotten to include toxic assholes. Bolton’s book describes the White House work environment as overwhelmingly negative. He cites non-stop infighting between staffers who tear each other down to get the ear of the President. Like, is this the White House or a reality show? The answer is both. 

While obviously, no one should have to work in that type of environment, I’m having a hard time feeling bad for Bolton. What else was he expecting when he took this job? Much like contestants on The Bachelor, I doubt the people working for Trump are there to make friends.

John Bolton is the Nastiest Skank Bitch I’ve Ever Met. DO NOT TRUST HIM. 

Much like Regina George, the concept of irrelevance and being reduced to a lower social circle probably terrified John Bolton, prompting him to release his “tell-all book” and launch himself back into relevance. He certainly wasn’t motivated by what’s best for the public interest, because if he was, he would have released this information via congressional testimony during the impeachment hearings. 

Bolton even covers the impeachment inquiry in his book, citing specific things he would have done differently or further explored if he was in charge. He spends 592 whole pages painting himself as a victim and an innocent bystander to Trump’s crimes as if he isn’t complicit in (at the very minimum) looking the other way. 

Like, I appreciate the sentiment of publishing all of the crimes that Trump committed in office, but if Bolton actually cared about this country and getting him out of office, he had so many other opportunities to do so for free and in a more accessible way than this stupid book. At its core, this book is a pathetic attempt at revenge on the Trump administration. 

Unlike Regina George, Bolton isn’t scattering the pages of his book for free and is charging, like, close to 20 dollars for it. F*cking classic. As much as we all love hearing about other people’s drama, especially when it comes to the President, let’s all make a collective agreement to not buy his book. Instead of spending the $20 on it, buy a book (or two or three) from a Black author. Personally, I’m in the middle of Symone Sanders’ book, and I’m a huge fan. 

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Trump Says He Was Just Inspecting The White House Bunker, Not Hiding In Fear

Last Friday, as protestors across the country marched to demand an end to police brutality, where was our President? Giving an inspirational speech? Meeting with protest leaders to find a way forward? Marching in solidarity? LMAO, not a chance. Instead, Donald Trump went to the White House bunker on Friday night, where he spent nearly an hour. As protestors gathered outside the White House, Trump was criticized for hiding and tweeting angrily rather than actually addressing their concerns, but now he has an explanation—he just had to inspect the bunker!

In the past, the bunker, formally known as the Presidential Emergency Operations Center, has mostly been reserved for use during terrorist threats, like the 9/11 attacks. White House spokesman Judd Deere said, “The White House does not comment on security protocols and decisions,” so we don’t know exactly how many times the bunker has been used, but it’s generally meant for pretty serious situations. Considering that protests outside the White House last Friday were largely non-violent, the President’s trip to the bunker seemed a little dramatic.

But there’s another explanation! In a radio interview with Brian Kilmeade of Fox News on Wednesday, Trump said of his ~visit~ to the bunker, “I was there for a tiny, little, short period of time, and it was much more for an inspection.” He continued on about this inspection that definitely happened, saying “I’ve gone down two or three times, all for inspection. And you go there, someday you may need it. I went down; I looked at it.”

So, just by a show of hands, does anyone believe this sh*t? I mean, I’m sure someone has to inspect the bunker periodically, but there’s a zero percent chance that the President of the United f*cking States is personally responsible for that. And in case you don’t believe my hunch, the PEOC, specifically, is reportedly designed to withstand the force of a passenger jet crashing into the White House, which I have a feeling is not the kind of thing you can test by just “looking at it.”

The likelihood of Donald Trump just randomly visiting the bunker—let alone “inspecting” it— on a night when, according to the Associated Press, protests in Washington “sparked one of the highest alerts on the White House complex since the Sept. 11 attacks in 2001” seems… low. And for a President who’s spent more than 250 days at golf clubs over the course of his Presidency (costing taxpayers more than $130 million), I really don’t buy that he’s doing some kind of important inspection on a Friday night. We know he was just hiding out.

Trump’s story about inspecting the bunker is an obvious attempt to make it seem like he’s not afraid of the protestors, but I think anyone with two brain cells to rub together knows that’s not what’s really going on here. Trump is a coward and a liar, and he has a convenient habit of backtracking when something he says or does makes him look bad. Just this week, he received widespread backlash for his “when the looting starts, the shooting starts” tweet, but he tried to explain it away, saying it was “spoken as a fact,” and that generally “looting leads to shooting.” I don’t think anyone but his most fervent supporters actually believe this stuff, but in a situation as serious as this, his words still have the potential to do great harm.

We can’t say for sure how many people will believe the bunker inspection story, but according to a new poll this week from Reuters/Ipsos, the majority of Americans do not think the President is handling the protests well. While his overall approval rating sits at 39% (his lowest in six months), only 33% of respondents say they approve of Trump’s handling of the protests. Clearly, the majority of people are unimpressed with Donald Trump’s leadership right now, and lying about the bunker isn’t the way to make things better.

Images: Frederic Legrand – COMEO / Shutterstock.com

Here’s How Politicians Would Spend Their Quarantines

Hey girl, wanna quarantine & chill? Welp, hope so, because you don’t have much choice. Trump has urged Americans to limit gatherings to 10 people or less. Quarantining ourselves will help keep COVID-19 from spreading, and it’s especially important for young people to take on this responsibility, as we are often carriers who can spread the virus unknowingly to elders or people with other health conditions, who are more likely to experience serious effects from the disease.

While some of us are working from home, and many of us are stuck without work or paid time off (send love and cash to any service workers/independent contractors you can!), most politicians are still out in these streets. I guess they have a duty to fulfill in these dark times…let’s see if they can rise to the occasion.

But since we’re home, we’ve decided to spend some time coming up with how some of our most beloved and most despised politicians would spend their quarantine & chill time. Let the games begin!

Bernie Sanders

Bernie is going to take this time to get set up on the Youtube so he can continue making videos once again asking for us for our financial support. His wife, Jane, will be his videographer, and they will go widely unseen since Bernie doesn’t realize it’s all about the TikTok at this point. He will ignore Hulu’s repeated recommendation that he stream “Hillary.”

Bernie will also, of course, take this time to really lean into his bedhead and socially distance himself from any type of hairbrush or comb. Jane supports him in this journey because their love is pure.

Elizabeth Warren

Liz will be damned if this quarantine stops her from being productive. She’s color-coding her closet, reorganizing the food pantry, doing her friend’s taxes, and making spreadsheets simply for the fun of it.

If she, her husband, and Bailey want to watch a movie? You bet your sweet ass Liz has made a PowerPoint presentation breaking down which options are best and why.

Liz will, of course, continue coming up with bulletproof political plans that will go underappreciated by the American public.

Mike Pence

Things are finally as God intended: Pence is at home with Mother, away from any other nasty woman’s presence.

Here, Mother can provide Pence with the 8 glasses of warm, whole milk he requires per day, while she reads him the Hyde Amendment (the legislative provision barring the use of federal funds to pay for abortion) out loud to soothe him. All is well.

Mitch McConnell

Mitch McConnell will treat social distancing the same way he treats his time on Capitol hill: by ignoring the many bills currently on his desk that could literally save lives. He and his wife, Transportation Secretary Elaine Chao, will further map their path to corrupt the federal entire government until McConnell is exposed to the virus, after which he will retreat back into his shell to self-quarantine for 14 days.

Joe Biden

Tbh who fucking knows, but I can confidently predict he would go on live TV and say something like, “I spent my quarantine time like I did every Christmas as a kid: riding my tractor down to the graveyard to have chicken fights with Ol’ Man Popsicle Stick, who, have you me, under many things, as they say, would not, on account of, you know, the thing.”

AOC

No amount of social distancing can stop this content queen from setting Twitter ablaze with her hot takes. Anyone with a bad take is getting retweeted WITH comment and dragged to clap back hell.

No internet troll is safe. No conservative commentator can hide. She’s coming for you.

Susan Collins

Hopefully sitting in a corner and thinking about what she’s done. And then regretting it.

That’s all I’ll say on that.

Brett Kavanaugh

Speaking of Susan Collins…

You just KNOW Brett is the guy who is going out to crowded bars and getting blackout, even after we’ve been told to socially distance ourselves.

Nothing can stop him from going out with his boys Tobin, Squi, and P.J.!!! Time to chug some beers and FSU because this is AMERICA and no one can tell him no (and if they do it will not compute).

RBG

A GoFundMe has been put together to provide RBG with a glass box, a la the one Joe locks his victims in in You, but obviously less creepy and fully equipped with everything Ruth needs for her daily workouts.

Food and water will be brought to RBG by a person in a hazmat suit, who will deliver it through a small opening in the box. Again, much like Joe from You, but with the intent to keep this woman tf alive, not to kill her. She is routinely let out so she can be measured for the top-secret, Bloomberg-funded RBG clone that we are definitely not making.

Cory Booker

Cory Booker gets to spend his quarantine time the way we all wish we could spend ours: with Rosario Dawson. The two are finally together without the distractions of his busy political life and her busy celebrity/being a perfect person life.

With this extra free time, Cory will of course continue to pursue his passion of tweeting out bad jokes about coffee. Fuck it, he might just turn it into a passion project and make a coffee table book full of lame coffee jokes. The perfect present for all of our dads.

"Sleep" and I broke up a few nights ago. I'm dating "Coffee" now. She's Hot!

— Cory Booker (@CoryBooker) May 29, 2009

Maxine Waters

Maxine Walters will be reclaiming her time, tyvm.

Donald Trump

Social distancing as president is what Trump had always thought this job would be like. He’s locking himself in his room, ordering all the McDonald’s fish fillets in the greater D.C. area, stockpiling Diet Coke, and watching Fox News.

Melania is pretending to have COVID-19 as an excuse to not be near him.

At long last, peace, quiet, and a lack of total responsibility. America is finally great again.

Want more stories like this? Subscribe to the Betches Sup newsletter for a lunchtime briefing to make you laugh, instead of cry, about the news.

Images: Giphy (5)

9 Times Trump Played Himself On Twitter

If you’ve been living under a rock—or don’t subscribe to The SUP yet for some reason—you may not know that for the past what-seems-like-forever, the President has been under some sort of investigation — from misconduct prior to running for president, to misconduct during his campaign to finally, abusing his power while in office.

However, like any other sub-par white guy, our man Donald has way too much unearned confidence, and, in a totally unsurprising move, is running for reelection come November.

Since crazy sh*t comes out of the White House at least twice a day, I thought it was important to remind you of some of the most ridiculous things you may have forgotten about.

We all know that POTUS has an affinity for a certain social media platform on which he pretty consistently incriminates himself. I scoured the internet and a platform full of Donnie T.’s tweets to pull this list together, and now I would like to set myself on fire and cry for a while. You’re welcome!

If you’re a masochist and want to go through the platform I used for, like, fun or whatever, you can find it here at http://www.trumptwitterarchive.com/.

1. On Winning the Election

To put this in context, Hillary Clinton beat Trump in 2016 by close to 2.9 million popular votes, which pretty much means that the electoral college is the main reason he is even in the White House. It’s good to know that he agrees he should never have been elected President.

2. On Being Laughed At

Last year, I made fun of my friend for hooking up with someone she said she’d never talk to again and then I got mad at her for making fun of me for doing the exact same thing. Since I’m turning 21 in a week, it’s harmless and kind of funny. Imagine how insane would it be if the president acted like a 20-year-old girl? Good thing you don’t have to!

Last December, five-ish years after this was tweeted via a f*cking Android, the leaders of France, Canada, and Great Britain all shared a laugh at the President’s expense. So, yeah, Donnie, it would be nice if our president were taken seriously.

3. On Being Productive and Golf

Could you guys even imagine our Commander-in-Chief traveling around the country to host fundraising rallies or to play golf while there are serious matters to attend to? Seriously—I could not imagine a world in which a President went to a campaign rally while the House was voting on whether to impeach him. It would be even more insane if the President were playing golf during, say, a f*cking devastating hurricane.

4. On World War III…

Yeah. It would be f*cking crazy if someone made a decision that put our country at danger of being forced to enter a massive war. From instigating a Twitter fight with North Korea to ordering a drone strike that killed Iranian Major General Qasem Soleimani, this President is not doing well to avoid, you know, a third World War. Even better, in 2011, Trump said that Obama would start a war with Iran to win reelection. His visions are playing out with Raven Simone accuracy. Way to go, man.

5. On Teleprompters

This scathing criticism of Obama’s teleprompter use is coming directly from the guy who allegedly snorts Adderall to be able to read off a teleprompter. Last summer, Trump blamed a teleprompter problem when he got sh*t for saying that the “Continental Army took over the airports during the Revolutionary War.” Wild that his reliance on teleprompters is so extreme that it prevents him from knowing literally anything about history.

6. On Giving Credit Where Credit Is Due

Like many of us, Trump requires external validation and is constantly seeking approval. Unlike many of us, he is not showing signs of growing out of that need and is also the F*CKING PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. So, anyway, Trump criticized Obama for taking credit for the killing of Bin Laden.

Crazy because, in a briefing given after the killing of Soleimani, he, um, took credit. He literally said, “last night, at my direction, the United States military successfully executed a flawless precision strike that killed the number-one terrorist anywhere in the world, Qasem Soleimani.”

7. On College Records and Applications

Back in the good ol’ days of Obama (we miss you), Donnie was really passionate about the release of a ton of Obama’s records including his birth certificate and college applications. But these days, our President, who is obviously really smart, had his lawyer threaten U Penn to get his transcripts covered up. Donnie says he is a very stable genius so who cares if he hid his transcripts, and that we still haven’t seen his tax returns. I think we should take him at his word and believe him when he says he’s really smart and rich the same way we do for guys who claim they are six feet on dating apps.

8. On His Own Impeachment

I want to let this cartoon that Trump tweeted in 2014 speak for itself because I’m f*cking speechless but let me follow it up with something he tweeted 5 months prior.

9. On Pelosi, Clinton, and Impeachment

As a treat, the last one I’ll leave you with is a surprisingly coherent video in which Donald f*cking Trump himself says the last things we would expect to hear from him in 2020.

Trump says (referring to Pelosi), “I’m very impressed by her, I think she is a very impressive person, I like her a lot”. Then, he follows it up with “it seemed like was gonna really look to impeach Bush and get him out of office which would have been a wonderful thing.”

Why did he think she should impeach Bush? “For the war… well he lied! He got us into the war with lies, and I mean look at the trouble Bill Clinton got into for something that was totally unimportant.”

Every action the President takes seems like the one that will finally end it, and when that’s never the case, it can be easy to get discouraged. That’s why stuff like this is important. We can’t just get distracted by his crazy fixation on his inability to flush a toilet and forget about all the truly evil and insane things this man has done.

The clusterf*ck that is this administration is going to stay in the White House unless you—and all of your friends and loved ones—actually pay attention and get informed. It’s not like you have to start only watching CNN or quit your job to go volunteer for whoever the nominee will be, but you have to do something (vote and subscribe to the newsletter, for starters).

Images: Giphy (2), geralt / Pixabay