A Betchy Breakdown Of The ‘Love Is Blind’ Season 8 Cast
mEight years in, and we’re still conducting the pod “experiment” on Love is Blind because research has to be thorough, people! I watch this show strictly for science and expanding my knowledge about love. No other reasons. Last season, we unfortunately witnessed raging narcissists, lots of bullying and gaslighting, and even someone lying about fatherhood. ‘Twas intense, to say the least. And I have a feeling this season is gonna match that level of chaos, based on this interesting new crew. Please enjoy my betchy breakdown of the Love is Blind season 8 cast. This is basically red flag central.
A Betchy Breakdown Of The Love Is Blind Season 8 Cast
The Love Is Blind Season 8 Women
Molly, 30, Executive Assistant
Molly seems a little unhinged, but in a fun way I think. The former cheerleader paid her college tuition with money she won from lip-sync battles. Kind of iconic… I didn’t know that was a skill you could monetize. She does seem a little too Christmas-obsessed, but maybe that’s not annoying to some people.
Meg, 31, Oncology Nurse
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Meg says she can be a “little bit air-headed” from time to time, which concerns me, ’cause, um, she’s an oncology nurse. After two years of living the single life, Meg’s ready to find a man who can cook (real), and she needs someone who actually asks her questions. Hear that, boys? No interviews allowed!!
Sara, 29, Oncology Nurse
Sara’s not like the other girls — she plays Call of Duty, which I’m sure lots of the guys are gonna love. Unfortunately, I do have concerns that she’s a liar; Sara claims she once typed the entire alphabet in three and a half seconds, which does not sound possible. She’s looking for guys who “don’t need fixing.” Lol, good luck.
Tiera, 34, Marketing Strategist
Tiera says she’s “very traditional and prefers the old ways” of dating, so it totally makes sense that she’s participating in the age-old tradition of pod-dating. She doesn’t super care about looks, but she low-key does want a Michael B. Jordan lookalike (who doesn’t?). Tiera won’t compromise on her faith, so I hope the guys are ready to show off how much they love God.
Amanda, 43, District Retail Manager
Amanda’s looking for an “organic” meet-cute. Does a popular reality show setting with cameras and producers count as “organic” or a meet-cute?? Lemme know. At 43, she’s the oldest cast member this season, but she’s more worried about communication skills than age gaps. “Somebody who can’t communicate is definitely an ick for me,” she says. Say it louder.
Ashley, 28, Client Success Manager
In her previous relationships, Ashley’s been told that she’s “a bit too much,” which means: she’s dated men who love to say annoying shit like that. “I am not willing to sacrifice my excitability,” she says. Tell ’em, queen. Ashley’s open to short kings as long as they’re “secure” and “confident.”
Casandra, 30, Hairstylist
I have an excellent feeling about Casandra, who’s a girls girl like moi. The hairstylist says her “good group of girls” always comes first, so she has my instant approval. Also, she does not wanna see any guys’ butt cracks and a great sense of humor is the ultimate green flag for her. Retweet, retweet. Casandra, can we be friends?
Brittany, 35, Partnership Executive
Brittany is all about new experiences, and that’s why she decided to move to Minneapolis… to each her own, IG. She’s a badass businesswoman and also played and coached Division 1 college basketball, so I’m pretty damn sure she’s wayyy out of every guy (in this cast’s) league.
Madison, 28, Artist
Apparently, Madison’s “most consistent relationship” has been with her French bulldog, Henri, and I honestly don’t see how a man is gonna top that. She’s so bad at texting that her friends sometimes think she died, so that’s not a green flag, but she does have a motorcycle, which is iconic. No men with “long fingernails and mommy issues who cheat” for Madison. Very specific!
Lauren, 31, Educational Sales
Lauren has 80 first cousins, so I’m scared. She likes asking questions, which I’m sure will serve her well in the pods, and she knows what she doesn’t want: an arrogant asshole. Seems like she has a good head on her shoulders… just too many cousins, unfortunately.
Kylie, 28, Medical Student
Kylie’s not playing around — she’s here to find a husband. (Too bad the men who go on Love is Blind are rarely husband material.) She’s a shopaholic and a god-aholic. “I am a very religious person, so I’m looking for somebody who has those traditions and is willing to share them with me and raise a family,” she says.
Yemi, 30, Product Sales Manager
Yemi is sick of Midwestern guys failing to make the first move. “I don’t get approached very often,” she says. “It might have to do with the fact that I’m a little intimidating.” Real. She’s looking for an “ambitious” guy with good manners… I wish her luck.
Virginia, 34, Healthcare Recruiter
Virginia’s a former cheerleader, so I’m guessing she’s a fabulous hype woman in relationships. I do think it’s a red flag that she likes to run marathons because… why would anyone wanna do that? She’s proud of herself for still trying to find love because it’s “really easy to become jaded.” I hear you girl, but I think you’re about to become a lot more jaded after this ~experience~.
Taylor, 32, Colonoscopy Nurse
Okay, Taylor is dangerously Christmas-obsessed. It makes me anxious that she “could cry just thinking about” decorating a Christmas tree with a man. Oh, and she carols all year. Yikes. After Christmas, humor is her second priority. She says, “If you can make me laugh, the rest is history.”
Monica, 28, Digital Marketing
Monica says her loved ones would describe her as “secretly really weird,” so yeah, I’d watch out for her. She also says “shoes are an ick,” which could present a problem for, well, going outside. She’s deleted the dating apps and put her faith in the pods, famously a much more reliable system.
Vanessa, 31, Media Planner
Vanessa’s a classically trained ballerina… slay. “My perfect partner is somebody who’s always down to try something new and go along with my crazy whims,” she says. I like it, I like it. She’s not willing to sacrifice dogs for a man, so I trust her judgment 100 percent.
The Love Is Blind Season 8 Men
Andrew, 27, Realtor
“I’m someone who is constantly searching for answers to not always the simplest questions,” Andrew claims. Oh boy. Lots of mansplaining in his future GF’s future, I fear. He’s also super religious and likes dancing despite being terrible at it. (It would be a no from me, but maybe his lady’s out there in the pods.)
Benji, 26, Entrepreneur / Realtor
Sir, you’re 26. Get out there and date! He’s looking for a “spontaneous” girl who likes to travel (sounds like every man on a dating app ever). Despite his age, he says he’s ready to settle down. We’ll see about that, I suppose.
Brad, 35, Dentist
Brad? Dentist? Two immediate red flags. I’ve never met a Brad or a dentist that I liked. That being said, he once won $10,000 doing a freestyle dance competition in Miami Beach, which is intriguing. He’s trying to avoid “mean” women. I don’t know what he could be talking about… there are no mean women?
Daniel, 30, Sales Account Executive
Daniel says he “doesn’t always think before he speaks” and is proud of his ability to ask for help… greeeattt! Oh, and he’s looking for unconditional love, of course.
Adam, 33, Fashion Director / Co-Owner
Adam hasn’t found The One yet, ’cause he’s been too busy killing it as a business owner. He’s grown his men’s clothing business from one small location to six stores across the country, which is impressive, I gotta say. He claims there are “no single people” by the time you’re 26… is Minneapolis Amish country? I’m confused.
Ben, 28, Developer
Ben has a competitive nature and also (allegedly) a passion for making people feel included. He claims to have a “sixth sense” for when someone’s feeling left out. Hmmm. I’ll believe it when I see it, ’cause I’ve yet to see a straight man with any kind of “sixth sense.” He’s looking for someone who’s outgoing, playful, and competitive.
Alex, 29, Commercial Real Estate Broker
Alex knows how to ride a unicycle, which is definitely a red flag. However, he’s also a former high school music teacher and plays the guitar, piano, bass, drums, violin, and clarinet, so that’s pretty cool. He’s looking for a “nerdy” and “adventurous” woman. I see you, Alex. You’re not like the other boys!
Devin, 29, Youth Director/Coach
TBH, Devin seems a little too good to be true. He has his own basketball training business and mentoring program to help kids reach their goals, and he loves cooking. “I would love to just be at home listening to music, partying and dancing,” he says. Yup, there’s gotta be something wrong with him.
Brian, 30, Wine Bar Owner
Brian spent his senior year of college opening up a wine bar, which is a pretty crazy choice. Most of us were partying and enjoying some last moments with our besties and situationships during that time. He’s obsessed with white teeth and hygiene, so good thing he’s going on a show where you can’t see the other person!
David, 33, Medical Device Sales
David also has way too many cousins (40). Why is this a theme?? Apparently, his “biggest turn-off” is “superficiality,” which essentially means no Botox. I thought the point was… love is blind. Am I crazy? David “struggles to express his feelings” and wants a woman with a personality that will keep him “curious.” Sigh.
Hugo, 30, Marketing
Hugo is an avoidant attachment king. “One thing I’m not willing to sacrifice for love would be my alone time,” he says. “I do need some space every now and then.” Re-fucking-tweet. He’s been single for four years and he’s ready to find a “down-to-earth” partner who’s up for adventures.
Scott, 34, Project Manager
Scott describes himself as a “golden retriever” and sounds like he has ADHD. He’s worried about “long dates lounging in the pods” because he has a lot of energy that he needs to get out. Hmmm, not sure the women are gonna love that. Apparently, he does read, which is a positive.
Mo, 35, Property Manager
I like Mo — he’s the first in his family to graduate college, and he says he’s “experienced significant personal growth throughout his 20s.” He’s looking for someone who’s trustworthy and ready to “embrace his big heart.” These don’t seem like crazy standards to me.
Joey, 35, Physician Associate
Joey has a suspicious amount of friends… he was in 11 weddings last year. He’s also ripped his pants on the dance floor at weddings a suspicious amount of times: six, to be exact. WTF is going on there? I have questions. “Healthy boundaries” are important to him, which is valid.
Mason, 33, Cinematographer
Mason’s looking for a girl with passion and drive, and he says a skater girl would be particularly “rad,” since he’s a skater himself. Oh dear. Apparently, his friends and fam describe him as a “big softie.” I’ll be the judge of that when the show starts.
Tom, 38, Management Consultant
Tom is a fitness fanatic, soooo… I’d stay away. But that’s just me. “I work out when I go on vacation and I’m pretty focused on my diet,” he says. Sounds terrible. Tom’s very concerned about falling for someone who’s always “glued to their phone.” Clearly, he’s not online enough to be at all cultured. Red. Flag.
Topics: Love Is (Not) Blind, Netflix, TV
Ilana Frost