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This Shit Is Up To 70% Off! The Best Presidents' Day Sales That Are Actually Worth Shopping

Listen, I’m not here to lie to you — paying full price for *anything* in this economy feels worse than accidentally liking someone’s 2015 Instagram post. So when I remembered that Presidents’ Day sales were coming up, my first thought wasn’t ~founding fathers~ (because, duh); it was ~founding some killer deals in my cart,~ ya feel?

This weekend isn’t just about scoring a day off to binge Netflix in bed — it’s also lowkey one of the best times to shop. And if a day off isn’t reason enough to buy, buy, buy, the fact that it’s also Valentine’s Day weekend should be. Whether you’re coupled up, celebrating Galentine’s, or just using it as an excuse to romanticize your own life, there’s truly no better way to show yourself some love than by treating yourself to some ridiculously good sales. Self-care is snagging that Dyson for $250 off, bestie.

And before you roll your eyes at yet another sale roundup, let me remind you that we’re not talking about 5% off a random toaster. We’re talking actual discounts on shit you actually want: designer fashion finds, home decor upgrades that scream I have my life together (even if you don’t), and tech that you’d otherwise have to sell a kidney for.

Every retailer is practically begging you to spend your tax refund early, and honestly? Who are we to say no? We love a little retail therapy when the math is actually mathing. And because I’m a generous queen, I did you the honor of rounding up the best deals from multiple retailers so you don’t have to sift through pages of “meh” discounts. Here’s everything worth shopping this Presidents’ Day and Valentine’s Day weekend because if there’s one thing our past leaders would want, it’s for you to secure the jacket — at 50% off, ofc.

Betches may receive a portion of revenue if you click a link and purchase a product or service. The links are independently placed and do not influence editorial content. Prices are accurate at the time of publication.

Umm… the coziest bed essentials for up to 50% off? Say less

Cozy Cloud Duvet
 $229
 $279

40% off this nonstick Carote set that makes cooking feel chic AF

CAROTE 14 Pcs Pots and Pans Set Nonstick
 $66.49
 $109.99

Get $250 off a cordless Dyson vacuum juuuust in time for spring cleaning

Dyson Digital Slim Cordless Vacuum
 $249.99
 $499.99

Oh, and 35% off the viral (and warranted, IMO!) Casper mattress

The One Casper® Premium Foam Mattress
 $599
 $749

Find tons of deals on eco-friendly Blueland cleaning products bc harsh chemicals are soooo 2024

Blueland Tablet Trio
 $46.40

P.S. It’s time to replace your old, gross couch because everything at Lovesac is 30% off rn

Lovesac Sectional
 $3,307.50
 $4,725

Lol remember BestBuy? They’ve got tons of deals on major appliances, laptops, TVs, etc. 

Apple - iPad Mini
 $399
 $499

Good news! You can finally get those AirPods since they’re currently 32% off

Apple AirPods Pro 2
 $169
 $249

Or snag some Beats for 50% off if big ass headphones are more your vibe

Beats Solo 4
 $99.99
 $199.95

Save 25% off everyone’s fave portable (and waterproof!!!) speaker

JBL Clip 5
 $59.95
 $79.95
 

Time to revert to bootcut jeans (or not…) with 40% off sitewide at Levi

Levi's 501® '90s Women's Jeans
 $68.60
 $98

20% off Uggs means, yes, you’ll be rocking them with shorts this summer

UGG Women's Classic Short Boot II
 $143.95
 $179.99

Hi, yes, you can get 40-60% off the denim jacket of your damn dreams TYSM

Gap Icon Denim Jacket
 $64.99
 $79.95

70% off a bunch of cute stuff at Macy’s? Sure, why not?

Free People Women's Midnight Magic Fit & Flare Mini Dress
 $76.80
 $128

Your shoe closet is literally *begging* you to shop The ARCHIVE SALE at Margaux…

Margaux - The Daphne
 $149
 $295

Stock up, friends, bc these best-selling nipple covers are 20% off

Nippies Nipple Cover
 $21.20

31% off a Nuna car seat feels illegal, so get one before they wise up

Nuna RAVA™ Flame Retardant–Free Convertible Car Seat
 $374.99
 $550

Take an extra 23% off an easy-to-use blow-dry brush that won’t break the bank

Wavytalk Thermal Brush
 $45.99
 $59.99

Or splurge and get the end-all-be-all blowout brush for the price of less than a visit to the salon

T3 Micro BOMBSHELL BLOWOUT Pack
 $199.99
 $285.99

Rachel Varina
Formerly one of the HBICs at Total Sorority Move (RIP), Rachel Varina has a long history of writing about things that make her parents ashamed. She's an avid lover of holding grudges, sitting down, and buffalo chicken dip. Currently, she lives in Tampa, Florida, but did not feed her husband to tigers. And even though she's married (with a *gasp* baby), she doesn't suck. Promise. PROMISE! Follow her on Instagram and Twitter (@rachelvarina) so she gets more followers than that influencer her husband dated in high school.