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New Year, New Moon, New You: Weekly Horoscopes January 11-15

The new moon heads into over-achiever Capricorn on Wednesday, turning us all into Hermione Grangers for a little while. Now is the perfect time to start (or restart) your 2021 resolutions (no judgment) and make sure you really get what you want out of this upcoming year—apart from vaccination and a functional government, of course. You’ve had a chaotic first week of the year, can’t imagine why, but now is the time to actually get your new year on track. We all deserve a little grace period right now.

Aries

Completing all your New Year’s resolutions in a single week? With the new moon in Capricorn there is basically nothing you can’t do, Aries. This week your work ethic, motivation, and general get-shit-done-itude are at an all-time high.  Just thank your lucky stars (literally) this happened during COVID so it won’t result in an expensive and hard to cancel gym membership.

Taurus

Maybe it’s the new moon in Capricorn, or maybe it’s the onslaught of terrifying historic events, but you’re feeling philosophical this week, Taurus. Even more exciting, a guru or spiritual teacher may present themselves in a way that will really help your spiritual growth this year. Just remember: if a white man in a robe asks you to move to a remote location, you might be joining a cult.

Gemini

Sparks are flying this week, Gemini, setting the tone for your romantic adventures for the rest of the year. No pressure. As corny as it sounds, now is the time to listen to your heart. Don’t hold back from exploring with a new person, or telling your partner about that thing you want them to do. And if they get weird just be like “new moon made me do it.”

Cancer

Any questions you have about your relationships are about to be answered with the new moon in your house of partnerships, so you can thank Capricorn for that. Don’t be afraid to put a label on something, even if that label is “over.” We’re already still dealing with the pandemic. We’re not bringing bad relationships into 2021 too.

Leo

Your health and wellness goals are off to an amazing start with a new moon in Capricorn, so TG you made your partner get you a fitness tracker for Christmas. And it’s not just a desire to work out. This new moon will be bringing about a desire for total health and wellness, which means aligning those chakras, eating a balanced breakfast, and—say it with me now!—actually drinking water. And they said it couldn’t be done!

Virgo

A hopeless romantic? You? Yep! This week with the new moon in Capricorn, you’re giving love a chance rather than preemptively swiping left on every person who might potentially talk to you. After what we all went through last year, who doesn’t deserve to be swept off their feet by a handsome stranger? Or at least exchange some sexy DMs with someone you don’t totally despise.

Libra

Fire up the interior design Pinterest boards! With the new moon in Capricorn, you’re refocusing on Chez Libra. While you may not be able to go full HGTV right now, making a list of home projects that you’d like to accomplish in 2021 and get started knocking things off the list. The pile of clothes next to your bed or the pile of shoes by your door are always great places to start.

Scorpio

Pay attention to who makes an appearance in your life this week, Scorpio, because with the new moon in Capricorn, the door is open for an important person (or a future important person) to make themselves known. Even something as simple as a late night fire emoji could be enough to signal this person is worth paying attention to. (Even if it’s just for long enough to block them forever.)

Sagittarius

Your income might be getting a boost from the new moon this week, so you can thank Capricorn for that! Whether it be the effects of your year-end bonus, an unexpected windfall, or that stimulus check finally hitting your account, use whatever you get wisely to start a nest egg for next year. Then set aside a small amount and go absolutely ham on Postmates.

Capricorn

That little voice in the back of your head that tells you to do sh*t? That’s called intuition, Capricorn. Listen to it. With the new moon in your sign, you’d be crazy not to. Things that started out as weird ideas you had while half-watching Bridgerton could end up being 2021’s next big thing. People have gone viral for wayyyy less.

Aquarius

A new moon in Capricorn means a time of transitions, for you, Aquarius. And with transitions come drama. Don’t be surprised if tensions reach a boiling point this week for you. It’s annoying, but it’s all part of The Universe’s plan to force you to act. Don’t make Her go even harder…

Pisces

You’re going to be feeling the need to reconnect with your crew thanks t o the new moon in Capricorn’s influence on your house of teamwork. Yes, COVID restrictions are still in place, but that doesn’t mean you can’t schedule a long FaceTime or go back to the early quarantine days of Zoom happy hours. (Worst. TBT. Ever.)

Images: Giphy

Alise Morales
Alise Morales
Alise Morales is a comedy writer and performer. She is the writer of the Betches Sup Newsletter and co-host of the Betches Sup Podcast.