I have good news and bad news. The good news is today is pre-Friday, which I think deserves a toast (or like, several) just for making it through this gloomy af week. The bad news? Well, next week is the start of August, which means summer is basically over. Kill me now. I HAVE YET TO GO NEAR AN OCEAN, PEOPLE. Ugh. While I am eagerly looking forward to the arrival of vampy manicures and everything pumpkin related, I am dreading the moment I have to tuck away my summer dresses for a boring (and utterly predictable) wardrobe. Don’t get me wrong—I’m not complaining about the fact that I can get away with wearing an oversize sweater, leggings, and the same pair of combat boots to the office. However, I’m so not looking forward to the ugly trends retailers will thrust in my face. Last year’s faux fur trend was pushing it, tbh. Before you make the mistake of shopping these, here are five of the worst fall fashion trends that will assault your Instagram feed.
1. Animal Prints
This was kind of a thing last year, except for the fact that it wasn’t as obnoxious and tacky. Expect to see more of it, and on every clothing piece from a bougie looking coat to kitten heels. This won’t be limited to just cheetah print, either. You’ll probs see other animal patterns like tiger, snow leopard, and even giraffe.
2. Ruched Details
Any texture that begins with an r is almost always fugly. Ruffles, ripples, ruching—how about let’s not and say we did. Not only do I think they are not flattering in the slightest, but they’re awkward, bulky, and honestly, it just looks like you’ve snagged a thread in your shirt. Let’s leave this trend in the early 2000s where it belongs.
3. Western Vibes
A ton of big designers have incorporated western vibes into their collections, so naturally, every other brand will try to mimic this. Yes, I’m pointing to Zara, Forever21, and ASOS. Unless you pregame to Blake Shelton and actually enjoy wearing your cowboy boots to the bar, I’m just going to advise you give this a hard pass to prevent social suicide. I’m only looking out for you, girlfriend.
4. ‘Little House On The Prairie’ Dresses
This is supposed to be a flirty “romantic” trend next season, but it only makes you look like Laura Ingalls Wilder—and not in a good way. These dresses are one thing on the Valentino runway, but in real life, it’s a no from me. As far as I’m concerned, this looks more like a Halloween costume than a dress that’s supposed to be taken seriously. Sorry not sorry.
5. Knee-High Leather Boots
As much as we all love OTK boots, all good things must come to an end. Unfortunately, the ever-changing fashion industry is trying to make knee-high boots a thing. This style is probably the exact pair your high school history teacher used to wear so she wouldn’t cross the line between prude and slutty. End result? A boot that falls somewhere in the middle of the calf and looks awko taco AF. Stick with the ankle bootie or classic OTK—Never in between.
Photos: Shutterstock; Asos; Urban Outfitters; Revolve; The Outnet; Shopbop
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