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The Super Blood Wolf Moon Comedown: Weekend Horoscopes January 25-27

This week we’re all coming down from the Super Blood Wolf Moon‘s affects (btw there was a Super Blood Wolf Moon) and you’re going to have to be careful if you want to strike the right balance of party energy, and not ruining your life energy. Here’s what the stars have to say about whether or not you should take that last shot of tequila.

Aries

What happens when an Aries stops being polite and starts getting real? You’re about to find out. This weekend you’re not in the mood to be nice or apologize for sh*t, so just warn your friends ahead of time that there might be drama at the club. Woooooorrrrldstarrrrrr!

Taurus

You’re in the mood for a solo adventure this weekend, Taurus, so embrace it. Put your group chat on mute and do some sh*t for yourself. Hiking, going to a museum, shopping, or just rewatching both Fyre Fest docs are all on the table. Just be sure to post to Insta Story so people know you’re not dead.

Gemini

You want to be romanced this weekend, Gemini, and that’s going to take finessing. If you’re in a relationship, start dropping subtle hints (i.e demanding) your significant other plan a date night. I’m talking some Bachelor level sh*t like a private helicopter, roses everywhere, and an unlimited wine bar. If you’re single, time to call in the reinforcements (aka that one coworker you know is in love with you) and see if you can’t at least get your dinner paid for.

Cancer

Exciting news: you will not be spending this weekend glued to your couch recovering from a hangover or trying to muster up the energy to go back to work on Monday. You’re feeling motivated to do stuff this weekend, making the the perfect time to check in on those 2019 goals. You are paying for that gym membership, after all.

Leo

You’re in the mood to be extra and beg for attention this weekend, Leo. I mean, you’re always kind of in that mood, but more so now. Try to figure out a way to do this that won’t annoy the sh*t out of everyone around you. Karaoke is a good outlet, but for the love of God, please don’t post your singing to Insta Story.

Virgo

Beware, Virgo—you’re in danger of catching feelings! Proceed with caution. Is this dude really “The One” or is he just “The One Who’s Buying You A Drink Right Now”? Not saying you can’t still go home with him, just maybe hold off on the matching tattoos.

Libra

It’s time to let some sh*t go this weekend, Libra. Whether it be the person you’re only texting because they’ve got a nice apartment, the “friend” who never Venmos you back, or just a toxic Slack channel, it’s time to shed those who aren’t serving you. You won’t miss them, but they’ll def miss you.

Scorpio

Hope your bank account is in a good place right now, Scorpio, because you’ve got the urge to splurge. Do you need a set of jade and rose quartz face rollers? Maybe. What’s the definition of “need” anyway? WebMD says it helps with anxiety and you have anxiety, so proceed to checkout!

Sagittarius

You just wanna make out with somebody this weekend, Sagittarius and ain’t nothin’ wrong with that. If you already have someone in your life that you like to make out with, find a way to be in the same place as them. If you don’t, go grab your “I want to make out” outfit and let the universe do the rest.

Capricorn

You know that amazing feeling you get right after canceling plans? Well that’s your vibe this weekend, Capricorn. Think up your excuses now and get ready to send your “omg I’m sooo sick” texts a respectable 1-2 hours before.

Aquarius

Hit up your favorite group chat and plan a brunch because you’re in the mood for some time with the squad. When was the last time you all got together and went crazy? Last weekend? Whatever, do it again!

Pisces

You have the very random (but also very helpful) urge to get your finances in order this weekend. Considering how rare this feeling is, use this opportunity to make that spreadsheet, dig up those old receipts, and maybe actually be ready by the time tax season comes around.

Images via Giphy (6), Unsplash (1)

Alise Morales
Alise Morales is a comedy writer and performer. She is the writer of the Betches Sup Newsletter and co-host of the Betches Sup Podcast.