I *Refuse* to Get Sick, and These Things Keep Me Feeling 100P

I recently found out that flu season can peak as late as February and honestly I feel like my whole life’s been a lie. I was minding my own business at the doctor’s when I overheard the hot office goss: “I can’t believe how hard the flu has been hitting.” Cue my massive panic attack.

I asked my doctor about it, and she told me that the flu is EVERYWHERE. ALL AT ONCE. Within seconds, I was begging for a flu shot and literally anything that could keep me healthy. I mean, I was prepared for the flu back in November and December but February? Hard pass!

So in the spirit of keeping healthy until spring, here’s a rundown of all the sh*t I’m doing to keep healthy that’s been working…so far.

Betches may receive a portion of revenue if you click a link and purchase a product or service. The links are independently placed and do not influence editorial content.

Hatch Restore Sunrise Alarm Clock

If I’m being honest, sleep is the answer to a lot of my problems. On the verge of a menty b? Take a nap. Feeling a cold coming on? Go to bed early. And while I’m not quite on the level of TikTokers with a 82 step night-time routine, I will say that my Hatch Alarm Clock has worked wonders to help wind down and fall asleep.

Hatch Restore Sunrise Alarm Clock, $129.99, Amazon

Kin Spritz by Kin Euphorics

IDK about you, but I was sick every week of college. I was also drinking like everyday. Coincidence? Probably not. Personally, I’ve been trying to have a mocktail in between every drink, similar to that “water after every beer” rule you learned in high school but conveniently forgot. If you’re out at a bar it’s hard to get creative, might I suggest a mocktail mule (aka gingerbeer and lime, sans vodka). But at home, it’s fun to mix it up a bit with Kin Euphorics.

Kin Spritz by Kin Euphorics, $20.72, Amazon

Beats Solo3 Wireless On-Ear Headphones



When I say that every time I have an overly-stressful week at work, I get sick, it’s an understatement. So I do what I can to reduce stress throughout the day, and thanks to the internet circa 2022 I realized that walking is the one reliable (and sustainable) way for me to reduce stress. Pop on a playlist of your fave music or podcasts and get moving. Your brain will thank you later.

Beats Solo3 Wireless On-Ear Headphones, $99.99, Amazon

Beekeeper’s Naturals Propolis Liposomal with Vitamin C

My mom truly would be so proud to hear that I’ve finally upgraded from orange juice to these handy packets in order to get my daily dose of vitamin C. The trick? I actually enjoy taking it—which I’ve been told can be a total triumph when it comes to supplements. (Hello, nausea.) This Beekeeper’s Naturals packet tastes a lot like honey and I’m pretty obsessed with adding it to my morning iced matcha. *Chef’s kiss*.

Beekeeper’s Naturals Propolis Liposomal with Vitamin C, $27.99, Amazon

Touchland Hydrating Hand Sanitizer

Truth be told, the only thing that keeps me sane in a crowd these days is—you guessed it—hand sanitizer. I started carrying some on me so I could use it on the subway, at Target, after the gym, after having to pick up my dog’s sh*t, etc. Whenever I know I’m going to be in an ick or sick situation, I reach for this hand sanitizer, and it’s honestly made me feel a lot more comfortable. Plus, there are so many cute options that it feels like the season’s must-have accessory.

Touchland Power Mist Hydrating Hand Sanitizer, $26.99, Amazon

Feature Image Credit/ Photo by Anna Shvets



7 Of Our Favorite Prenatal Vitamins

Whether you’re trying to get pregnant, are pregnant or postpartum, prenatal vitamins are chock-full of all the amazing sh*t your body needs to take care of a tiny baby. Like all vitamins and supplements, though, not all prenatals are created equal. Having the recommended amount of vitamin D, DHA, and folate can make the difference between a vitamin being okay versus really f*cking great. Regardless of which prenatal vitamin you choose, taking any supplement should be first discussed with your OB/GYN—as should trying to get pregnant in general.

According to Web MD, you’ll want to look for prenatal vitamins with the following:

To help you wade through this wide world of not-Flintstones gummies, we’ve rounded up the best of the best when it comes to poppable prenatal vitamins.

Ritual Essential Prenatal

Ritual’s prenatal vitamins are a bit of a standout because they don’t contain calcium, but that isn’t necessarily a bad thing here. Calcium and iron can compete to be absorbed by your body, according to Women’s Health magazine, so Ritual contains the iron you need for baby (and baby-makin’) and allows you to get calcium from foods you’re eating. Plus, chugging a glass of milk is probably easier for most of us than chewing a steak, so it’s a win-win, honestly. Ritual also contains 1,000 mcg of folate and 300 mg of DHA.

MegaFood Baby & Me 2

Crunchy hipsters, this is the prenatal vitamin for you. All of the vitamins, minerals, and supplements in MegaFood are paired with organic foods to ensure maximum absorption. In addition to having all (and for some, more than) the recommended values of vitamins and minerals (including 600 mcg of folate), MegaFood also contains mood-stabilizing choline, which, as someone who’s been pregnant can attest, is f*cking necessary. Like Ritual, MegaFood also leaves the calcium out, so be sure to supplement if you choose this vitamin. These prenatals call for two pills per day, which can help with your morning sickness since you’re spacing out the dose.

New Chapter Perfect Prenatal Vitamins

Struggling with nausea? This is the prenatal for you. New Chapter is formulated with organic ginger, which helps A LOT when it comes to feeling super sh*tty in the morning while pregnant, but it also helps that New Chapter spaces out your dosage to three pills each day, so you aren’t slamming your body with iron and nutrients at 7am and risking feeling dizzy. New Chapter also contains 100% of the folic acid and iron you’ll need each day. One thing to be aware of, though, according to Business Insider, is that “the source of this vitamin’s folate could be misleading. Folate is generally the naturally occurring form of vitamin B9, while folic acid is often synthetic. Rarely, some women can be sensitive to the synthetic form, and if that’s you, New Chapter might not be your pick.”

Nature Made Prenatal + DHA

These were my personal go-to before, during, and after pregnancy. This has double the recommended amount of folic acid (800 mcg)  and also has DHA, which is a super important supplement for a fetus’s brain and eye development. My kid’s eyes and brain seem tip-top atm, so I assume taking this sh*t worked. You can also get 150 soft gels on Amazon Prime for a little over $20, so this is a great option for the thrifty shoppers out there.

Vitafusion PreNatal Gummie Multivitamins

If you’re not into swallowing a giant pill in the morning, or, like, any time, get you some gummies. The Vitafusion PreNatal Gummies taste great, have all the necessary nutrients (600 mcg of folate), and are easy on your stomach. An important note for these, though, is that they don’t contain iron. Why? Because iron can be the main trigger for nausea, especially when you’re pregnant. So, if you go with these tasty vitamins, make sure you’re getting an iron supplement, too.

Rainbow Light Prenatal One Multivitamins

With a name like that, how could you NOT want these prenatal vitamins? It sounds like a Care Bear’s sponsored supplement. If you’re too young for that reference, get out. Anyway, the Rainbow prenatals are fabulous because they don’t contain any of the eight major allergens (soy, peanuts, fish etc.) and they have probiotics. Why does that matter? Because pregnancy, for many of us, means constipation, weird skin, nausea, and other uncool side effects, so having something with skin, mood, and tummy boosters along with the necessary supplements for you and baby is ideal. These contain 600 mcg of folate plus 32 mg of a probiotic blend.

One A Day Women’s Prenatal 1 Multivitamin

One A Day is a pretty well-known and trusted brand of vitamins, and their prenatals are a great option. In addition to having more than the recommended amount of folic acid (800 mcg), One A Day also has their supplements verified by an independent lab. If that seems weird, it shouldn’t. Vitamins and supplements aren’t regulated by the FDA, so a lot of times the claims you see on anything marked “supplement” can be iffy (looking at you, generic brand diet pills).
Betches may receive a portion of revenue if you click a link and purchase a product or service. The links are independently placed and do not influence editorial content.
Images: Amazon (6), Ritual, Ömürden Cengiz/Unsplash
The Supplements That Are A Waste Of Money (& Ones That Work)

In our health-crazed society, it can be easy to buy into the bullshit. Supplements somehow aren’t FDA-approved, so there is a lot of weird shit out on the market that claims it can do a bunch of stuff that it probably cannot, or it may actually be harmful. Here are the supplements should and could take, and which supplements you should run screaming from. Sorry, Instagram Models, turns out you’re not doctors. I mean, I’m not either. But like, I feel like I have better intentions here.

First, let’s start with the supplements that are legit:


If you eat a perfectly balanced diet, then you probably don’t need any kind of vitamin supplement. But like, who eats a balanced diet? Even when I’m eating healthy, I still pretty much avoid fruit because I don’t want MyFitnessPal to yell at me at my carb or sugar intake EVEN THOUGH IT’S THE GOOD KIND, YOU ASSHOLES. Like, I’d rather dedicate those carbs to bread. Anyway. Vitamins are essential for healthy body function, sickness immunity, pretty skin, pretty hair, etc. Chances are, you’re not getting enough nutrients from your diet, so if you want to take a multi-vitamin to amp up what you’re lacking, go for it. Especially if you’re like me and you never go outside for some Vitamin D, it may be worth adding a supplement.

Optimum Nutrition Opti-Women, Womens Daily Multivitamin Supplement with Iron, 120 Capsules

Optimum Nutrition Opti-Women Daily Multivitamin Supplement

Fish Oil

Speaking of pretty hair, fish oil is great for your hair, skin, and nails. Less important benefits are that it lowers blood pressure, reduces triglycerides, helps arteries, and reduces the chance of heart attack and stroke. Also? Did not know what triglycerides were. Googled it. Something about cholesterol. Apparently, you’re supposed to eat fish twice a week, according to the American Heart Association, so if you don’t do that you should def get some fish oil into your diet. Some fish oil supplements are, for lack of better words, fucking disgusting, but I take these and they don’t taste like you licked a fish’s asshole. (Do fish have assholes?) Also, they match the bottle above so they look cute together.

Optimum Nutrition Omega 3 Fish Oil, 300MG, Brain Support Supplement, 200 Softgels

Optimum Nutrition Omega 3 Fish Oil

Protein Powder

If you don’t get enough protein in your diet because you eat bread for every meal like I do (like I know it’s bad but I cannot stop), then supplementing with protein powder is totally safe. It is always better to get your nutrients from real food, especially since protein is easy to find, but let’s say you’re crazy a vegan, or you have no self-control like me (dammit, bagels). Protein is essential to your diet because every cell in your body needs it. You need it to repair cells and make new ones. Plus, you need even more if you work out to help muscle repair, and protein keeps you full the longest. Most protein powders are whey-based, meaning they’re essentially condensed milk and you get a lot of protein for not a lot of calories (20g/100 cal for most). Or if you’re vegan, they also have plant-based proteins which are made out of plants. Obviously. I’m assuming.

Now that you know what actually works, here are a few supplements that don’t work. You should avoid these like the plague we’re inevitably all going to get thanks to Kat Von D because she doesn’t believe in vaccines.

Weight Loss Anything

Guys. We need to talk. Weight loss is one of the simplest things in the world. It is free. The secret to weight loss is to eat less and move more. That is it. You don’t need to spend a bunch of money on weight loss products for the magic cure. Such a cure doesn’t exist. You just need to eat less, eat better, move more. Super simple—I know it’s not necessarily easy, but it IS simple. I mean, eating less sucks and I don’t want to, but conceptually this is not difficult nor should you shell out a bunch of money for it. Plus, you’ll actually save money if you’re going out to dinner less and eating less overall. If you manage to find a weight loss supplement that works, chances are it is horrible for you, and it’s better just to do things the right way. Like yeah, meth makes you lose weight too, but then you also look like this:

To be fair, she’s super thin.

Hair Gummies

Ah, hair gummies. Instagram marketing at its best. These gummies are usually around $30 a bottle and are basically a multivitamin with Biotin and a bunch of added sugars thrown in for good measure. Yes, Biotin can help promote hair growth, but you can get a bottle of Biotin supplements from your drugstore for like, $10 and skip all the sugar and unnecessary shit. This is my own personal experience and not at all a proven side-effect, but I ate gummy hair vitamins and all I did was break out. Did my hair grow? Maybe. I couldn’t tell over all the fresh acne.

Appetite Suppressants

Although I understand that Kim Kardashian is a woman of science and she is exactly who we all should take advice from on what to put into our bodies, I am going to violently disagree with this idea of appetite suppressants. One, eating is the best. Two, yeah right that those fucking lollipops even work. Three, you need food to live. If you’re hungry, you should eat, not try to stave off your body’s natural hunger signals. Like, odds are if you’re trying to cut calories, you don’t need to suppress your hunger, just your desire to eat shitty food (hi). You do not need to be sucking on bullshit, pro-starvation lollipops.

Images: Amazon (3); Giphy (1)

The Supplements You Need To Start Taking For Better Skin, Hair, And Nails

IDK about you, but maybe I was traumatized when I was a kid because when I think of vitamins, I think of those nasty-ass, chalk-tasting, vomit-inducing Flintstone vitamins my mom used to force me to take. I used to, like, cringe when I thought about the idea of taking vitamins. Have I grown into a mature adult since then? I mean, not exactly, but I obviously now know that vitamins are supposed to do good things for you and your body, and basically improve your quality of life. I’ve clearly overcome this (v rational) fear of mine and now that I feel ancient af, I started giving a shit about my overall well-being. Not that this will stop my weekly blackouts or anything. Vitamins have become my personal pill of choice, if you will, since they fix all of my life’s problems. From better skin to feeling happy AF, they do it all. I’m not a doctor so like, obvs ask yours first before popping anything on the regular. But when Xanax doesn’t cut it, here are the best vitamins you need to improve your overall health.

For Better Skin

The best vitamins for getting rid of annoying af pimples are A and E. Foods like pumpkin spice lattes, vegetables, and nuts help fulfill your daily dosage, but those who suffer from acne, eczema, or psoriasis may want to take an additional vitamin A supplement to reduce excess oil and strengthen skin cells. Too much of it can supposedly pose health risks if you’re not taking it properly so like, def ask your doctor first. However, this supplement contains a little bit of all vitamins to unclog pores and clear up skin quickly.

Murad Pure Skin Clarifying Dietary Supplement

For Longer Hair

I assume SugarBearHair is great and all, but I’m so bitter about seeing it on a daily basis that I’m not including it on this very unbiased list. This is an equally as fetch hair supplement because they don’t taste like shit and they’re gummies, so they’re basically candy. It holds the key to healthier, longer hair—in other words, it contains vitamin B and biotin.

Hum Nutrition Hair Sweet Hair

For Stronger Nails

Our skin, hair, and nails all need some form of vitamin B to thrive, TBH. So, more often than not, whether it’s biotin or B12, you’re doing each of them a huge favor. Whether you’re a victim of stubby, brittle nails or you’re just addicted to acrylic manicures, you’ll want to cop some B12 to keep in your bag. Take it with your lunch salad on a daily basis for stronger nails that grow a million times faster.

Sundown Naturals B12 1000 mcg

For A Better Immune System

As long as your mimosa has, at the very least, a splash of OJ, your body is thanking you in the long run. (Not actual medical advice. Get your flu shot.) Everyone in the English-speaking world knows vitamin C is your best bet for skipping out on a nasty cold or a gross flu virus. I’ve started taking this with my lunch everyday and like, not only have I not been sick in what feels like forever, but my skin is looking pretty fab, too.

Solaray Vitamin C 5000 MG

To Feel Happy AF

If you’ve recently been told that you need to take a chill pill STAT, well, then you probs need more vitamin D in your life—and I don’t mean that in the way fuckboys say it. The lack of sun and heat is making me feel bitter 24/7 and only making my chronic RBF worse. To make sitting in a cubicle all day less depressing, consider taking vitamin D3, which is supposedly the same as basking in the sun on a hot summer day. I can honestly say these will hold me over until March 20th.

Hum Nutrition Here Comes The Sun Softgels

Image: Maira Gallardo / Unsplash

5 Supplements To Take For Clear Skin That Looks Like It’s Been FaceTuned

IDK about you, but sometimes it feels like I could be my most obnoxious, vegan, fitstagram-loving self and still feel dead inside have shitty skin. Like, this week I drank a whole vomit green smoothie and ran to the train once. Doesn’t that count for anything? I wash my face (almost) every night, attempt to eliminate 3am pizza on the weekends, and will even drink the occasional glass of water. Most people telI me to just be patient with my skin, but I hardly understand what “being patient” means. Thankfully, I’ve finally found the solution to all of my problems: skin-perfecting supplements. No, this is not an #ad and I’m not #sponsored. This is the real deal. Please note that I am not a doctor and you should probs discuss any vitamin/supplement regimen with your doctor aka don’t sue me. Here are the best life-changing skin supplements that will get you model-looking skin faster than you can say “link in bio”.

1. HUM Nutrition Daily Cleanse Clear Skin And Acne Supplement

This is not only a supplement that rids toxins from your skin, but it also gets rid of toxins inside your body that are contributing to breakouts. Full of detoxifying and botanical nutrients, it helps detox the skin and other internal organs for clearer and much healthier skin. Take up to two a day without food and you’ll start seeing visible results after just a few weeks.

2. OmegaGenics Evening Primrose Oil

Dermatologists love this shit, tbh. Evening primrose helps target really fucking painful acne (such as cystic acne) and helps speed up the healing process and reduce redness. Omega-6, which is seriously an essential for glowing skin, smoothes the skin’s texture and prevents unnecessary swelling. Take one three to six times a day for #spon celeb results.

3. Heliocare Dietary Supplement

Heliocare is full of a fuck ton of antioxidants (which is v important for like, being healthy) and consists of natural ingredients such as wild fern extract. The plant prevents wrinkles and awk facial lines that hide your inner 80-year-old self. For hotter months, it also prevents cell damage and dangerous sun exposure effects. If you can barely swallow an Advil, you only have to take this once a day for optimal results. Bless.

4. Caudalie Vinexpert Dietary Supplements

This supplement is full of anti-aging and moisturizing magic that helps keep your skin from sagging and looking dry af. It’s also full of natural antioxidants such as Resveratrol (also found in red wine) that helps get rid of dark spots and protects from cancer-causing UV rays. So, I mean, keep chugging red wine like it’s your job at dinner and/or just take two of these a day and you’ll see fab results in just a few weeks.

5. Dr. Barbara Sturm Skin Food

“Skin food” might sound kind of nasty, but it is actually a healthy alternative for the path to the “fountain of youth,” according to Dr. Barb here. It’s a formula reduces evidence of slowly becoming ancient aging, prevents swelling, and produces fresher, clearer skin immediately. It keeps your skin firm without looking like you went under the needle and evens out texture and skin tone. Pop two a day with water and you’ll wonder why you didn’t stumble across my really good advice them sooner.

Read: 7 Supplements That Will Undo The Damage You Did To Your Body Over The Weekend
6 Beauty Supplements You Need To Take For Better Skin, Hair, & Overall Appearance

Who here is still feeling personally victimized by the weekend? *raises both hands and feet* I mean, I realize it’s Tuesday—a full 72 hours since I’ve sabotaged my mind, body, and spirit by ingesting enough alcohol to kill most humans and texting every person in my phone who has a penis—but the damage still feels very recent, ya know? If you couldn’t tell, I’m really thriving in this life. My mother is v proud. Anyway, as a result of the way I choose to live my life these circumstances that 100 percent could not be prevented in any way, shape, or form, my hair, skin, and body are starting to fall apart faster than my credit score. It’s like the world is trying to tell me something? Like maybe treating my body like the floor of a frat house might have more long-lasting consequences than just having to scrub my social media of my drunken antics from the night before? Or that maybe I need to start actually taking care of myself…? *shudders* Nah, I’m not looking to fix all my problems by, like, changing my life and all my habits. I’d rather just take a pill or whatever. Or in this case, a beauty supplement aka the thing that makes you look pretty without you having to actually put any effort into it. Blessings. I’m guessing that you, like me, are also a human trash bag someone who looks for the easy way out whenever possible, so I’m sure I’m about to change your whole life with this hard-hitting segment on beauty supplements. You’re welcome in advance. Anyway, here are the beauty supplements you need to be taking like, right fucking now so you can tell everyone you just woke up like this and actually mean it. 

For Your Best Hair Day

Celebrity hairstylist Jen Atkin, stylist to Bella Hadid and the Kardashian Klan and their wigs, is saving all of our average lives because she just released a hair growth supplement called Ouai Dry Hair Supplement, so now you too can look like an off-brand celebrity. See, Mom? Dreams do come true. The supplement is made specifically for dry, brittle, or thinning hair, but really if you have hair in general, you should be taking this shit on a daily basis. Packed with vitamin E, amino acids, and biotin, it will make your hair look shiny and hydrated AF. 

Ouai Dry Hair Supplement

For When You Feel Tired AF

So basically my constant state of being 4-6 days a week. Hey, it’s not my fault I lead a thrilling and adventurous life with my Netflix account that constantly keeps me up way past a normal person’s bedtime. A girl’s gotta have her priorities, am I right? If you’re high-key always tired like me, then try taking Olly Restful Sleep Blackberry Zen Vitamin Gummies. Hopefully, after an extended amount of time with these bad boys you’ll look less like a zombie and more like you actually have your shit together. A girl can dream. These gummies help to restore your hair, skin, and nails while also giving you an extreme boost of energy. Made with melatonin and other ingredients to help promote sleep, you should take these right before bed to help get you into a relaxed state before you pass the fuck out. 

OLLY Restful Sleep Blackberry Zen Vitamin Gummies

For When You’re Stressed AF

My stress levels are constantly somewhere between eating-my-feelings stressed and I’m-about-to-jump-into-oncoming-traffic stressed, and I am not about to get premature wrinkles just because I can’t get my life together. No fucking way. Goop vitamins in the “Why Am I So Effing Tired” formula will save your fucking life. And, no, this isn’t some gag product. That’s the name of an actual beauty supplement. The mix aims to combat fatigue, increase energy levels, and diminish stress by combining Vitamin B, Omega 3’s, and a bunch of other shit that will keep you looking fresh AF. 

GOOP Why Am I So Effing Tired

For When You Look Like The Crypt Keeper

If you’re looking for a formula that specifically combats wrinkles then you should invest in Dr. Barbara Sturm’s Skin Food, which is actually quite an investment because this shit is pricey AF. That said, it really fucking works. While it won’t get the root of your problems (i.e. staying up late to watch the entire first season of Riverdale for the third fucking time in three months, and then being so tired at work all you do is google “Cole Sprouse + girlfriend?” before spending the last few hours of your day wondering why you sabotage your life like this, and then going home to do it all over again) but it will keep your skin looking like something out of a Neutrogena commercial. Really all I can ask for at this point. This supplement utilizes the ingredient purslane, which is an anti-inflammatory and rich in antioxidants to protect your skin and support its healthy function. Plus these capsules also help hydrate and moisturize your skin.

Dr. Barbara Sturm's Skin Food

For When You Feel Fat AF

Ever wake up on a Monday morning, bloated from the combination of brunch, mimosas, and poor life choices and wish you could take a diet pill, but without the ephedrine and risk of heart attack? No, me either, I have no idea what that’s like. For the rest of you aka not dirty fucking liars out there, HUM Nutrition’s Skinny Bird is basically what Regina George thought Kaltene bars were. They contain Caralluma Fimbriata to curb appetite, 5-HTP to reduce stress eating, green tea extract to boost metabolism, and chromium to control blood sugar. No, I don’t know how any of it really works but you’ll drop 10 pounds like that! *snaps* Take one capsule up to three times a day a half hour before your next meal so you don’t over eat.

HUM Nutrition Skinny Bird

For When Your Life Is Just Falling Apart In General

Honestly, so relatable. I live off a steady diet of cheese and shitty Pinot Grigio, so let’s just say all aspects of my outward appearance are constantly being personally victimized by me and my disgusting lifestyle. If you relate to my Bumble bio this lifestyle as well, then you’re going to want to invest in a multivitamin to cover all your bases. Ritual Essential for women is one of the more up-and-coming multivitamins for women and it’s supposed to give you better, skin, hair, and nails, and it’s got nine essential nutrients in it that most women lack, like iron, magnesium, vitamin D3, folate, and more. The only bad news here is you need a prescription to get access to these miracle workers. But the good news is now you have an excuse to spend the rest of your day on Zocdoc looking up hot AF doctors to take pity on you and write you a prescription. 

Ritual Multivitamin

Read: The 7 Best Supplements To Undo The Damage You Did To Your Body Over The Weekend
The Supplements You Need To Get Your Skin & Body Ready For Summer

Working out might be one way to get fit, but you can improve your fitness and health without even sweating at Soulcycle. That’s because the buzzy beauty brand HUM Nutrition knows betches like things that come in cute packages and they’ve designed all-natural supplements for every beauty need a betch might have. How convenient, because summer means it’s getting too hot to run outside but also it’s time to show off your beach bod. Naturally we’re obsessed with HUM, because we can chill and do less work while still getting hotter. 

Speaking of less work, HUM Nutrition takes all the time and guesswork out of finding the perfect vitamin match. Take their 3-minute online evaluation for a foolproof plan that will give you personalized recommendations of exactly what you need. Your personalized plan, courtesy of one of HUM’s registered nutritionists, will deliver real results and protect against future concerns, because we all know betches aren’t pros at thinking long-term. Their pills are GMO-free, gluten-free, and drama-free. They’re basically like the boosts you can get at Jamba Juice, but without the extra calories and without having to like, go to a Jamba Juice because you’re not 16. Here’s the betchiest ones, in our HUMble opinion. (Sorry, had to.)

1. Here Comes The Sun – Vitamin D3

A hot betch like you shouldn’t be in an office all day, because the world deserves to see you under the sun and glowing like the bronze goddess you are. Unfortunately sometimes you gotta work to afford your lifestyle, so that’s where these Vitamin D3 pills come in. Get your daily dose of sunshine from these pills until you’re on a beach resort again. You’ll feel so sunny and bright, your co-workers will wonder if there’s some secret rooftop garden they don’t know about in your building.

Here Comes The Sun

2. Skinny Bird – Weight Loss Support

So you partied all spring and before you realized it, it’s already summer. Whoops, somewhere between hangovers and drunk hookups you forgot to work out. This supplement is for you, because it’ll keep you skinny without ruining your vibe. It’s a daily all-natural fully vegan weight loss support supplement that works by boosting metabolism, curbing your appetite, and reducing stress eating. You’re used to taking pills and not having an appetite for days, but this time it’s actually good for you. Enjoy the summer body, betch.

Skinny Bird

3. Red Carpet – Glow Supplement

This plant-based omega supplement is perfect for when you have a hot date and want to look sexy without putting on too much makeup. Red Carpet hydrates cells, making your hair look fuller and skin glowy, like you just won prom queen all over again. Except this time you won’t have to slow dance with a sweaty Sean McGinnis while wondering if your double-sided tape will hold up your dress. 

Red Carpet

4. Turn Back Time – Anti-Aging Supplement

You’re always at your peak, but that doesn’t mean you don’t have a better peak. As in, we know you only post TBT photos because you like how skinny you look in them. This supplement will help reverse and protect against aging without botox or therapy. You know how you can’t drink without a 2-day hangover anymore? We can’t help you with that, but at least you’ll look like you went to bed at 10pm and didn’t do 10 shots the night before. This can’t turn back time for any regrets, but it will bring back your recruitment body when you looked hot and full of hope. 

Turn Back Time

5. Uber Energy – Consistent Energy

You’re tired all the time, because you’re small and doing things wears you out, but don’t worry because this supplement will give you the energy you need to stay out until last call. To be honest you’re probably just bored most of the time, because working in a cubicle under fluorescent lights is not exactly Miami during spring break, but take Uber Energy to make it feel like you just got to Coachella and you haven’t lost your phone and best friend yet. This supplement will naturally boost and balance your energy and give you good vibes throughout the day.

Uber Energy

6. Daily Cleanse – Skin & Body Detox

Daily Cleanse herbal formula is basically a juice cleanse for your skin and gut but without the pretentious juice bottle you have to carry around. So you’ll just have to find another way to secretly let everyone know you’re better than them.

Daily Cleanse

Bonus: Betches get 20% off their first purchase with code HUMBETCHES at checkout! Get shopping!


The 7 Best Supplements To Help Undo All The Damage You Did To Your Body Last Weekend

As much as we try our best to take care of ourselves and stay on top of our health, sometimes (aka every weekend) we slip up. Like, I can spend Monday through Friday talking about my waspy paleo diet and active lifestyle, but then the weekend comes with like, eight tequila shots, a late-night diner stop, a grueling hangover and a full-on carboload, and suddenly I’m like, barely alive by Sunday night. We did some research and rounded up some supplements that will help keep you healthy on those days where you forgot to eat a vegetable or get more than four hours of sleep or replaced water with grain alcohol. Here are seven supplements you should be taking on the reg:


Taking a probiotic every morning will help with digestion, prevent bloating, and keep your gut healthy throughout the day. Probiotics are literally live bacteria and yeast, which sounds gross AF, but your body already produces them naturally, and adding an extra supplement will change your life. If your stomach is particularly sensitive to specific foods, a probiotic will do wonders for any bloating or nausea you might have throughout the day. Also, if you frequently get yeast infections or other vaginal probs, probiotics might help balance your shit out. Yah these things are like 30 fucking dollars a box at CVS, but just suck it up because they’re the best.


Fish Oil

This one sounds gross too, but don’t knock it till you down it with a liter of water. Taking a fish oil supplement every day has been proven to prevent ADHD, Alzheimer’s, depression and anxiety. It’ll also help reduce inflammation in your body strengthen your hair and nails, so stop gagging and order your fish oil. We know what you’re thinking, and no it won’t make your vagina smell or taste (more) like fish. 

Finding Nemo

Vitamin C

Vitamin C isn’t only meant to be taken when you feel a cold coming on. It obviously boosts your immune system which helps prevent sickness, but Vitamin C has so many other benefits that most people don’t know about. Vitamin C is an antioxidant, and it’ll help your body maintain any weak connective tissue, like your bones, blood vessels, and skin. If you’re prone to breakouts or blackheads, taking a Vitamin C supplement will be a game changer for your skin.

Vitamin C

Collagen Powder

You may have seen collagen powder being used in a smoothie in some health food blogger’s Instagram story, and there’s a reason it’s completely blowing up in the wellness world. Collagen is a tasteless powder that helps aid gut health, soothes sore muscles, and prevents wrinkles in your skin as you get older. Plus, two scoops has like, 20 grams of protein, so adding some to your smoothies or yogurts, or even your coffee, will help keep you full longer after breakfast. PSA: Getting collagen injected into your lips does not count, Kylie.

Kylie Jenner


Most betches happen to be anemic as fuck, but even if you’re not, getting some extra iron in your diet is so good for you. When you’re not getting enough iron, your nails will get super brittle, you’ll bruise really easily, and your hair might even start falling out. Don’t wait till you look like Mary-Kate Olsen. Start taking a slow-release iron supplement to keep your body strong and keep your hair on your head.


B Vitamins

There are eight B Vitamins, and they have been proven to help maintain your metabolism, your muscle tone, and your concentration. Folic acid, specifically, helps keep red blood cells healthy, which is super important for your long-term health. Whether you’re going into work with two hours of sleep, recovering from a weekend of one too many vodka sodas, or just trying to upkeep all that work from your 2-pound SoulCycle weights, taking B vitamins is def the right call for you.



Bullshit ads from your childhood have been telling you to drink a shit ton of milk to get your calcium, but a lot of leafy greens and vegetables actually have more calcium in them than dairy does, so you don’t have to be chugging a cup of 2% every morning. I mean, that should be a given. Anyway, if you’re worried your bones could use some extra strength or you’re prone to dental issues, taking a calcium supplement is a good idea. 

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