Fraternity ‘Role Model’ Arrested After Allegedly Groping, Punching Flight Attendants

In the latest story of white privilege gone wild, an Ohio man has been charged with three counts of battery following an incident on a Frontier Airlines flight. Max Berry, a 22-year-old from Norwalk who looks like every fraternity’s president, was caught on video going completely berserk on a Frontier flight from Philadelphia to Miami on July 31.

The video, which was posted on Twitter by ABC News reporter Sam Sweeney, has already been viewed over 9 million times. In the clip, Berry can be heard yelling, “My parents are worth over f*cking 2 million goddamn dollars. And you know what? You f*cking suck”. I mean, I know he’s flying a low-cost airline, and while I am certainly worth nowhere near $2 million (take off six zeros and that’s hitting closer to my net worth), $2 million is not exactly the flex Berry thinks it is. I’m sure the airline that pulled in over $2 billion in 2018 is shaking over this guy whose parents… own a nice house in the suburbs.

Later on in the video, he screams, “My grandpa is worth more than this f*ckin’ plane” before screaming something about a “f*cking attorney” and telling a flight attendant trying to get him to calm down to “shut the f*ck up.” Really checking all the boxes for white dude rage fits. (The New York Times was unable to confirm if Mr. Berry did, in fact, retain an attorney.) Other passengers can be heard laughing, probably because this is truly the embodiment of a terrible joke—or, more accurately, a hateful comment one tries to pass off as a joke upon realizing nobody’s laughing. He later appears to punch a male crew member. 


Things started to go south for Mr. Do You Know Who My Dad Is when he ordered his third drink on board (he had already consumed two drinks prior to the meltdown). According to the criminal complaint filed with the Miami-Dade Police Department, Berry brushed his empty cup against a flight attendant’s backside. The flight attendant told him, “don’t touch me.”
Then, Berry spilled his drink and went to the bathroom, from which he emerged shirtless. A flight attendant informed him that he needed to be fully dressed and even helped him get a new shirt out of his carry-on. Re-clothed, he walked around the cabin for about 15 minutes.

That’s when he groped the breasts of another flight attendant, who told him not to touch her and instructed him to sit down. The complaint also said that Berry put his arms around the same two flight attendants later and groped their breasts again. When the male flight attendant approached Berry to ask him to calm down, Berry punched him in the face.

The crew had no choice but to restrain Berry by duct taping him to his seat. (The NY Times reports that a seatbelt extender was also used to restrain him.) He was arrested upon landing at Miami International Airport, which surely put a real damper on his Miami trip.

At first, Frontier Airlines released a statement saying that the flight attendants involved with duct taping Berry had been suspended “pending further investigation”, saying, “unfortunately, the proper policies for restraining a passenger were not followed.” Frontier did not elaborate to the NY Times about what said proper policies for restraining a passenger were, and whether duct tape qualified.

The Association of Flight Attendants dragged Frontier’s initial response; its president, Sara Nelson, said in a statement, “Management suspended the crew as a knee-jerk reaction to a short video clip that did not show the full incident. Management should be supporting the crew at this time, not suspending them.”

After receiving backlash for suspending employees who were allegedly sexually and physically assaulted, Frontier quickly backtracked and at 4:10pm ET on August 3, amended their statement.

“Frontier Airlines maintains the utmost value, respect, concern, and support for all of our flight attendants, including those who were assaulted on this flight. We are supporting the needs of these team members and are working with law enforcement to fully support the prosecution of the passenger involved.” The statement also clarified that the flight attendants involved were placed on paid leave, which the airline says is “in line with an event of this nature pending an investigation.”

Berry was released on a $1,500 bail, and the FBI declined to press felony charges. Berry graduated in May from Ohio Wesleyan University where—and you truly cannot make this up—he was given an award from the Greek life community for being a “perfect role model” and for working to “fight to dismantle fraternity stereotypes.” Stereotypes he singlehandedly embodied all of on that 2 hour and 37 minute flight.

A spokesman for Ohio Wesleyan told the NY Times in an email that the university is “saddened to learn of this situation with one of our graduates.” The spokesman, Cole Hatcher, also asserted, “The case does not involve the university, and the incidents depicted do not reflect Ohio Wesleyan’s values.”

Translation:

idk her

Images: Jason Schronce / Shutterstock.com; SweeneyABC / Twitter; Giphy

This Viral Video of a Senator Making a Tuna Melt Has Us Screaming

I never thought I would say this, but a new video has been released during the coronavirus quarantine that made me cringe even harder than Gal Gadot’s embarrassingly tone deaf “Imagine” sing-a-long. What on Earth could be more devastating than a bunch of rich celebs trying to heal everyone by singing off-tune in their mansions, you may ask? A senator making the most horrendous tuna melt sandwich I have ever seen on Instagram Live. That’s what, b*tch.

Okay. So. First, mentally prepare yourselves to be repulsed.

Great, now let’s dive into this nasty tuna melt disaster. Democratic senator Mark Warner of Virginia decided it was time for him to give back to the community by sharing a recipe from his past that he apparently still eats all the time. Great. How very wholesome. However, the “recipe” is for a tuna melt, which is honestly fine by me. I don’t mind a good tuna melt if it’s done right. This was not done right, fam.

View this post on Instagram

My daughters won't eat them anymore, and my staff tried to stop me from sharing this quarantine delicacy with the world. Fortunately for you, they were OVERRULED. So here it is, my soon-to-be-world-famous Tuna Melt.

A post shared by Mark R. Warner (@senatorwarner) on

First, let’s peep the caption:

My daughters won’t eat them anymore, and my staff tried to stop me from sharing this quarantine delicacy with the world. Fortunately for you, they were OVERRULED. So here it is, my soon-to-be-world-famous Tuna Melt.

A lot to unpack here. His daughters and staff had tried protest this abomination, but to no avail. As they say, if everyone who loves you tells you you’re making a bad decision, go ahead and go for it! Has been working for me re: my dating life for years! Also, absolutely obsessed with him calling this his “soon-to-be-world-famous Tuna Melt.” Gorgeous. No notes.

Now on to the actual recipe. Senator Warner’s first mistake is that he does not mix the tuna and the mayonnaise. Instead, he takes each slice of bread and just absolutely goes to town, squirting a mountain of mayo on each slice. It is…upsetting. White people: when will we answer to our sin of worshipping mayonnaise? Not soon enough.

Ok @MarkWarner we need to talk. That’s too much mayo dude. Where is Lisa? I love your effort…but…. https://t.co/Fnuvg5bHhQ

— Claire McCaskill (@clairecmc) April 21, 2020

Next, the senator opens his can of tuna, which he notes is his preferred brand of Chicken of the Sea (he and Jessica Simpson both). Then he does.not.drain.the.tuna. Nope. He just scoops it right onto the bread. I…

Next up is cheese. This is fine. He chooses some mediocre cheddar, declaring proudly that he’s a “two slice man.” Whatever.

THEN. THENNNNNNN. This grown-ass man….puts his “soon-to-be-world-famous” sandwich IN THE MICROWAVE. Sir.

This man is claiming his sandwich should be world-renowned, and he is cooking it in the god damn microwave. Not even toasting his bread. He is microwaving tuna fish!!!! That is a war crime.

And this, my friends, is why going live on Instagram should be illegal.

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Images: Twitter(1) Instagram(1) Giphy(2)

 

What Is The Bottle Cap Challenge And Why Do We Care?

Guys, I wish it hadn’t come to this. I wish I wasn’t writing an article about something called “The Bottle Cap Challenge,” but yesterday I called a friend’s new baby “alien-esque,” so I guess karma works quick, huh? So what is the Bottle Cap Challenge, other than a stain on our history, an assault on my eyeballs, and a dumpster fire to my brain? Why I’m glad you asked, since I’ve got to write 800 words on the subject. Allow me to ruin your life enlighten you.

According to PopSugar, The Bottle Cap Challenge was started by Taekwondo instructor and fighter Farabi Davletchin on June 25th. Fine, Farabi, you seem cool. And, if you had only stopped there, I wouldn’t have had to add you to my revenge spreadsheet. But this turned into a viral challenge, and that gains you automatic entrance onto my list. Sorry pal, I don’t make the rules, I just enforce them. (Fine, I also make them.) Since the Bottle Cap Challenge began, celebrities have been participating in it, and also challenging their friends/colleagues/people they want to embarrass. Should we take a look at the best of the bunch? And by best, I mean “the ones that elicited a very strong reaction in me.” Onward!

Mariah Carey

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Challenge accepted! #bottlecapchallenge

A post shared by Mariah Carey (@mariahcarey) on

If I HAD to pick a favorite because some animal was threatening to rip the coffee IV out of my arm or something equally horrific, I’d have to pick Mariah Carey’s. There’s so much to like here. She’s wearing a sparkly waist trainer.  She pretends to do some taekwondo moves in the beginning. It doesn’t work the first time. She proves to us that she’s STILL. GOT. IT. That voice! And, when it’s over, she runs away with a healthy mix of shame and satisfaction. That’s all I ask. Bow down.

Kendall Jenner

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you asked for it @haileybieber …

A post shared by Kendall (@kendalljenner) on

I hate the KarJenners and nothing they do will ever please me, so if you’re a fan, you might want to put on the earmuffs right now. *Beginning rant* We know you’re rich, Kendall. We know you’re skinny, Kendall. We know you spend your days on jet skis instead of in darkened cubes surrounded by people who make sexist jokes that you’re forced to laugh at in order to get that raise you begged for, Kendall. WE KNOW. You don’t have to continue to shove it in our faces with everything you do, MY GOD. I’m not impressed. I’d only actually be impressed if she completed this challenge in the unfinished half of a friend’s basement after drinking straight vodka for 6 hours like the rest of us were doing at age 23. Only then. *End rant*

Lizzo

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Y’all muthafuckas ain’t really knockin that bottle cap off the bottle bitch!!! #BottleCapChallenge

A post shared by Lizzo (@lizzobeeating) on

First of all, hi Lizzo, where’d you get that jumpsuit? Help a girl out. Second of all, FINALLY someone speaks the truth! No one is actually completing these challenges, right? Certainly not while on a jet ski *cough* Kendall *cough*. Sorry sweetie, truth hurts. GET IT??

Ryan Reynolds

#BottleCapChallenge #Glass @AviationGin pic.twitter.com/joM20RhUid

— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) July 3, 2019

Ryan Reynolds gets a special mention here, because I appreciate his commitment to self-promotion. Did you guys know he owns a gin company? If you didn’t know, please see his 45-second commercial disguised as a viral challenge video. Does he successfully complete the challenge? I have no idea, because I lost interest in this one after 9 seconds, but now I am craving an ice cold G&T at 9 in the morning. Thanks, Ryan!

Jason Statham

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#bottlecapchallenge #challengeaccepted @erlsn.acr This thing landed on my head from @johnmayer but will quickly go to a couple of fellas we’ve seen do push ups badly. All yours @guyritchie and @jmoontasri

A post shared by Jason Statham (@jasonstatham) on

There’s no one cooler than Jason Statham. There just isn’t. He once used defibrillators on himself. He put shards of glass in his eye. He jumped off a high-rise building with only a raincoat as a parachute and broke both legs. The Bottle Cap Challenge? A cake walk. This is the only video I can mildly tolerate. Call me, Jason! 

Did I miss any cool ones? KIDDING. They don’t exist. I hope you got your fill of the Bottle Cap Challenge, because this is the last you’ll hear of it from me. Fingers crossed it will pass quickly and we can all get back to watching our regularly scheduled YouTube makeup tutorials!

Images: mariahcarey, kendalljenner, lizzobeeating, jasonstatham/ Instagram; vancityreynolds/ Twitter

A Troll Tried To Shame Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez And It Totally Backfired

Well folks, it finally happened. The right figured out how to savagely take down left-wing, newly sworn in congresswoman and bold lip legend Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. The battle has been won, as a Twitter user dragged Ocasio-Cortez by posting a video of her *checks notes* innocently dancing along to a song from The Breakfast Club and seemingly having some sober fun on a college campus?

That’s right, some idiot thought he could destroy the voice of our generation by exposing her as a great dancer who also went to Boston University. Nice try, asshole. The whole thing obviously backfired, because of course we are all obsessed with this adorable video of AOC showing off her dance moves as a youthful, adorable college kid. I mean, weird that she’s on the rooftop of her college and not learning how to poorly blow smoke O’s while smoking weed out of a carrot, but I’ll let that slide.

The original (which has since been deleted of course) read:

Here is America’s favorite commie know-it-all acting like the clueless nitwit she is…
…High School video of “Sandy” Ocasio-Cortez

Here’s the video from some other guy so you can watch it yourself:

A big LOL to the fact that conservatives think a woman being sworn into Congress should be discredited because she once ~danced~ as a teen, but are totes fine with the fact that a man was sworn into the Supreme Court after eye witnesses told stories about him belligerently punching a man in the face at a bar for literally no reason and putting his dick in a woman’s face at a college party just for funsies. Not to mention, he had a friend name Squee…and casually was accused of sexual assault by multiple women. Very cool and very legal.

Anyway, the internet responded as it should for once and was like “lol what r u talking about tho?”

And here’s the live footage of my initial response to the video:

Anyway, republicans are clearly obsessed with AOC (just wait til you read the eventual comments on this article…wow) and they’re honestly starting to look v desperate. Looking forward to their next devastating takedown of her, in which they release a clip of her curing cancer while rocking red lipstick and revealing that she’s also an incredible singer or some shit. Keep ’em coming guys, these are honestly entertaining.

Update: AOC has responded, and because she’s AOC, it’s the f*cking best:

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This Is What Really Goes On In The Guys’ Bathroom

One of the greatest mysteries of human existence is what people of the opposite sex do when they go to the bathroom. We know what guys think girls do, and it’s mostly accurate. The crying. The false complimenting. The re-application of highlighter, and, most importantly, the low-key shot taking out of tiny bottles you keep in your purse. The one thing guys definitely have wrong is that they apparently think the ladies room is some kind of luxury paradise, complete with couches and nice smells. Sadly, as anyone who has visited a ladies’ room can attest, it’s just a regular bathroom with less urinals and more little metals boxes for tampons and stuff. The guys’ room, as far as I can tell, is exactly the same as the girls’ room except there is more open farting and exposed penises. But like…what do they do in there? Do they talk? Or do they just stand in silence desperately trying not to make eye contact or look at each other’s penises? Personally, what I imagine when I think of the men’s restroom feels pulled from a Saw movie, but I have a feeling that, much like the Kardashian-level accommodations men imagine for women, my idea of the men’s room might be overblown. So what do guys and girls do in the bathroom?

Betches investigates: 

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The Emotional Stages Of Getting A Text From Your Crush

Any betch who’s been in even the briefest of relationships, IRL or otherwise, knows that getting a text—much less getting a first text—from a guy who isn’t an actual boyfriend is harder than hiding a hangover at Sunday brunch. Unless you’re sending a nude (we won’t judge), we can practically guarantee that it’ll take no less than an hour or two to get a response, if you get one at all. Hey, even the betchiest amongst us can admit that it bruises the ego a little when you check your phone hours after you’ve sent a risky text and the only notifications you have are a text from your mom and a voicemail from your therapist confirming your appointment on Wednesday.

So, obviously if you get that elusive first text from a guy—and one who you don’t find repulsive, at that—celebratory alcohol a congratulations from your friends (and even your family, hi Grandma) is in order. Below, check out Betches’ latest video “When Your Crush Texts You First” and fantasize about the day that this actually happens to you. Remember to subscribe to our Youtube channel for more hilarious content!

 
Watch: Signs You’re Too Good At Creeping
What Every Party You See On Snapchat Is Actually Like

Anyone who’s ever stayed in on a weekend night (so like, all of us) has experienced the FOMO that comes along with a night of being responsible aka too hungover from the previous night. You settle in for a night of Netflix, but first you gotta check your apps. Facebook is the same—just some of your vaguely prejudiced friends posting veiled statuses in support of Trump, nothing new to see there. You check Instagram and have a few chuckles at some memes. But then you make the cardinal mistake of checking Snapchat, and you come to the realization that everyone is out having fun without you. Your friends aren’t holding a funeral service for your absence. Your coworkers who said they were doing nothing this weekend are all out drinking without you. Those bitches. But never fear, because we’re exposing the reality of all those “fun” parties you see in our new Social Media Vs. Reality video series. That lit house party you see your roommate at? Yeah, that’s probably like, three people and an iPhone. The crazy club night your cousin’s posting about? Think of it this way: If it were really that fun, she wouldn’t be constantly taking breaks from dancing to capture, filter, and upload selfies every 10 minutes. I know, I’m a genius.

Anyway, here’s what that house party you saw on Snapchat was actually like IRL. (Spoiler alert: You didn’t miss anything.)

Taking Off Your Makeup Expectations Vs. Reality

We all know by now that the number one thing you can do in life to fuck up your skin is fail to take off your makeup properly. That and like, not drink so much alcohol, but only one of those options is truly feasible for the average betch’s modern lifestyle. Unfortunately for those of us who usually come home some combination of tired/drunk and are generally lazy, there are a lot of steps to actually taking your makeup off that go way beyond soap and water. Like, apparently Q-Tips should be involved? I’m honestly shocked. Also I continually fail to understand the presence of cucumbers in our beauty regimens. I mean, I don’t hate it, I just don’t understand it. Which is most things in life, I guess.

While we all hope to come home after work and completely remove every trace of dirt from our pores and thoroughly exfoliate our post-workday skin, we all know that this dream is basically bullshit. In reality you will most likely stumble home at the end of the night, splash water on your face, and walk out of the bathroom with the day’s mascara still fully applied to your lashes. 

In order to illustrate this phenomenon, check out Betches Video’s latest “How To Take Off Your Makeup Expectations Vs. Reality” video and be like, “omg this is me.” Subscribe to our Youtube channel for more funny videos just like this one.